Why Anxiety Is Typical After Miscarriage and the way to Cope

 

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Feelings After Miscarriage It’s Normal

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8 Things You Go Through After Miscarriage

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MISCARRIAGE & MENTAL HEALTH | Trigger warning

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FEELINGS AFTER MISCARRIAGE | Coping With Your Emotions After Baby Loss | Ysis Lorenna

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In fact, most research suggests that anxiety disorders are a more common condition following pregnancy loss than even depression. Anxiety Disorders Commonly Seen After Pregnancy and Miscarriage Anxiety disorders are serious mental illnesses that cause significant worry or fear that doesn’t go away and can even worsen over time. “The truth is pregnancy after miscarriage is full of triggers and anxiety,” says Arden Cartrette, of Hello Warrior, a site that shares stories about infertility and pregnancy loss. “The fear. Why Anxiety Is Common After Miscarriage and How to Cope.

Feelings of anxiety after a miscarriage might be specific to anxiety about a new pregnancy or could be anxiety about life in general. Some may face the choice of whether to use anti-anxiety medications to control anxiety following a miscarriage. For couples who want to try for a new pregnancy, this begs the question of whether or not these drugs are safe.

Postpartum anxiety may seem an odd subject to bring up in a post on coping with miscarriage. But research indicates that new moms with a history of trauma (reproductive or not) are more likely to experience postpartum mental health issues like postpartum depression or anxiety. Pregnancy after loss: How to handle anxiety and fear. By Alice Domar.

When a woman has a miscarriage, one of two things tend to happen. If she hasn’t told anyone that she was pregnant, she often decides to tell no one about her loss. If she tells no one, she suffers in isolation, and wonders if her sadness and overwhelming loneliness are normal. Why Anxiety Is Common After Miscarriage and How to Cope.

Medically reviewed by Carly Snyder, MD Getting Through First Trimester After Miscarriage. Reviewed by Rachel Gurevich Ways to Cope with Guilt After a Miscarriage. Reviewed by Rachel Gurevich Funeral Planning After Pregnancy Loss. Fact checked by Donna Murray, RN, BSN.

Immediate Aftermath of Miscarriage The falling hormone levels in your body after a miscarriage might magnify your sad feelings into full-blown depression, but this effect should fade within a few weeks. Your feelings may range from sadness to anger to depression. Coping with grief after miscarriage The grief you’re feeling is real — and no matter how early in pregnancy you experienced the loss of a baby, you may feel that loss deeply. Some well-intentioned friends and family may try to minimize the significance of a loss with a “Don’t worry, you can try again,” not realizing that the loss of a. Aromatherapy is thought to help activate certain receptors in your brain, potentially easing anxiety.

Go for a walk or do 15 minutes of yoga Sometimes, the best way to stop anxious thoughts is to. After the initial grief of miscarriage, there’s the physical aftermath to contend with as well. The extent of your body’s repair depends on how far along you were before pregnancy loss.

List of related literature:

In the weeks following a stillbirth, women commonly experience sadness, irritability, feelings of guilt, physical symptoms, depression, and anxiety, characteristic of grief; 20% continue to have symptoms a year later.

“Comprehensive Gynecology” by Gretchen M. Lentz, David M. Gershenson
from Comprehensive Gynecology
by Gretchen M. Lentz, David M. Gershenson
Elsevier Mosby, 2012

Women who have had a previous reproductive loss may experience depression, anxiety and unresolved grief in a subsequent pregnancy [41,47,48].

“Critical Care Obstetrics” by Michael A. Belfort, George R. Saade, Michael R. Foley, Jeffrey P. Phelan, Gary A. Dildy
from Critical Care Obstetrics
by Michael A. Belfort, George R. Saade, et. al.
Wiley, 2010

analysis of women patients who have miscarried often reveals, many years after this event, their sense of loss, prolonged grief and unresolved mourning—a longstanding depression, a loss of self-esteem and a hatred of their female bodies which do not bear live children as their mothers did.

“Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan: A Biopsychosocial Perspective” by Carolyn Ambler Walter, PhD, LCSW, Judith L. M. McCoyd, PhD, LCSW, QCSW
from Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan: A Biopsychosocial Perspective
by Carolyn Ambler Walter, PhD, LCSW, Judith L. M. McCoyd, PhD, LCSW, QCSW
Springer Publishing Company, 2009

Following a miscarriage, a woman may experience sadness, guilt, anger, posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms, and anxiety about future pregnancies.

“Comprehensive Gynecology E-Book” by Rogerio A. Lobo, David M Gershenson, Gretchen M Lentz, Fidel A Valea
from Comprehensive Gynecology E-Book
by Rogerio A. Lobo, David M Gershenson, et. al.
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2016

Course and treatment of panic disorder during pregnancy and the postpartum period.

“General Principles and Empirically Supported Techniques of Cognitive Behavior Therapy” by William T. O'Donohue, Jane E. Fisher
from General Principles and Empirically Supported Techniques of Cognitive Behavior Therapy
by William T. O’Donohue, Jane E. Fisher
Wiley, 2009

Levels and effects of different forms of anxiety during pregnancy after a prior miscarriage.

“Maternal & Child Health Nursing: Care of the Childbearing & Childrearing Family” by Adele Pillitteri
from Maternal & Child Health Nursing: Care of the Childbearing & Childrearing Family
by Adele Pillitteri
Wolters Kluwer Health/Lippincott Williams & Wilkins, 2010

After Miscarriage After the miscarriage, depression, anxiety and grief may be experienced.

“Perfect Cure Through Homoeopathy” by K.R. Gulati
from Perfect Cure Through Homoeopathy
by K.R. Gulati
B Jain Publishers Pvt Limited, 2004

Mild to moderate anxiety symptoms are common during pregnancy, but severe anxiety symptoms need prompt diagnosis and treatment, as anxiety can have a deleterious effect on pregnancy and the fetus and increase the risk for postpartum anxiety and depression (Heron et al. 2004).

“Handbook of Consultation-Liaison Psychiatry” by Hoyle Leigh, Jon Streltzer
from Handbook of Consultation-Liaison Psychiatry
by Hoyle Leigh, Jon Streltzer
Springer International Publishing, 2014

When women who have experienced miscarriage become pregnant again, anxiety, fear, and overprotection are common as a result of fear of another miscarriage.

“Fitness for Work: The Medical Aspects” by John Hobson, Julia Smedley
from Fitness for Work: The Medical Aspects
by John Hobson, Julia Smedley
Oxford University Press, 2019

Women who have experienced previous pregnancy losses often have higher levels of anxiety compared with women who have not suffered such loss.

“Foundations of Maternal-Newborn and Women's Health Nursing” by Sharon Smith Murray, MSN, RN, C, Emily Slone McKinney, MSN, RN, C
from Foundations of Maternal-Newborn and Women’s Health Nursing
by Sharon Smith Murray, MSN, RN, C, Emily Slone McKinney, MSN, RN, C
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2013

Oktay Kutluk

Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.

Mail: [email protected]
Telephone: +1 (877) 492-3666

Biography: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/kutluk_oktay/
Bibliography: oktay_bibliography

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90 comments

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  • I’ve recently lost my baby at 19 weeks due to missed miscarriage, I’ve never felt pain like this before in my life. My first baby. I pray to God I’ll feel better soon. I feel like I’ve matured 10 years over the last 2 weeks and I just want my little family. Thank you for this video x

  • Good for you and hope you can enjoy this two kids. Is complicated and have experience something similar, very sad but other kids keep you busy and you forget the pain of loss unless you get remainders around you.

  • I miscarried twins in July. Before I smoked alot of weed, and after i just went balls deep. Now I quit everything to clean up and be healthy to try again. I think smoking helped because now I’m like up all night. It sucks. My husband is ok but he could be better. Also 2 weeks ago after waiting for my period my period started and all at once. I was in the taco shop bathroom and I swear it all came out and once, I thought I was dying. No lie a blood clot the size of my fist came out ;( it was the scariest thing I’ve ever seen. God bless all us women. He has our babies and that’s all that makes it ok

  • I wanted to add one word to your list.
    SURVIVOR!
    I have had 4 misscarriages and we need to stick together. Loss is hard i also have ptsd after post partum. I had psychosis because of this. I had to be put on medications. Make sure to see a therapist. I would have never thought of my loss’ as being a survivor before. I had bunnies i slept with for 3 years every day! A couple months ago i gave them to a little girl who can sleep with them. I hope they give her as much love and consolation as they did me.

  • Thank you for this! I had my miscarriage two days after I got my BFP. Mother’s day was so hard and thinking about what could have been has been hard. I’ve been TTCing for 1 month since but a part of me is scared that I will not get pregnant again or if I do it will happen again…

  • I lost my baby a month ago. I went through step 1: the denial and acceptance, now I am going through step 2: the grief, the guilt and the anger this is definitely difficult to get through. I’m going through crying spells, anger of what did I do wrong? I should’ve meditated more to release more stress and be more relaxed. To lashing out toward my boyfriend and I’m trying to understand how he feels. It is very difficult ��������������. I talk to others that have gone through what I am going through. I’m now starting to write in a journal.

  • NO ONE should EVER minimize the loss of your baby! Each loss is unique, and everyone experiences loss in their own way. You need to grieve, and even years down the road, you will still think about your precious babies.

    My daughter-in-law has a blog called “Faithfulness Declared” where she speaks of the three miscarriages she has experienced.
    Praying for you!

  • It took sheer guts and strength to make this video!  Your suggestions about how to help someone that has experienced loss are spot on.   Thank you for sharing this difficult video and may God bless you with your rainbow baby soon!

  • This helped me so much I have one child. But I’ve been pregnant four times and just had my 3rd miscarriage and my first d&c on friday. I’m so heartbroken. Thank you Ysis for making this video.

  • Thanks for sharing this video. I did not know that there is a baby loss awareness week. And now I do and I’m grateful because it will remind me of what had happened to me. It is still very fresh. It just happened a week ago that I had a miscarriage. It sounds strange talking about it now but I’m just grateful that I saw this video. I was 5 weeks pregnant and it was supposed to be our second baby and me and my husband were really excited about it. So excited that it didn’t even enter our mind that anything could happen. It was a normal miscarriage, they told us in the hospital, that happens to 50% of expectant mothers. It was so bizarre how the gynecologist talked to us about it because to me she was insensitive and just drop all the words lightly that it seemed like we were just talking about a wounded knee but then again maybe I was too sensitive because of what had happened and maybe she wasn’t insensitive at all. Anyhow, in the end of the conversation, she became more mellow and said a helpful phrase at least to us, that nature has its own way of stopping some things that could go wrong sooner or later. Could be that the “baby” didn’t continue to grow because something’s wrong with it and it would be best to stop now than later. All I could think about when they told me that I lost the pregnancy was what did I do wrong, was I walking around a lot, was I lifting heavy stuff, was I very stressed. It just made me feel not worthy enough for a second pregnancy. I’m still coping with it but I’m really glad that I have other mothers to share this with. Thanks again..

  • Oh Kelsie this video was just absolutely everything! ❤️���� I can see how hard this was for you and I hope it isn’t patronising to say how proud of you I am. Couldn’t agree more about the unspoken competition when it comes to TTC/infertility/miscarriage and how the loss of a pregnancy isn’t understood in the same way the loss of ‘a life’ is. So much love being sent your way as always xxx

  • Wow! You took the words out of my mouth. I felt exactly the same way as you did. I’ve lost 3 babies and it’s hard every time. You never get over that pain, you just learn to live with it. I too feel forever changed. I have so many fears because of it. It also robbed me of the joy I should have had once I conceived my daughter. I also take each due date or what was to be the due date and allow myself to feel for the baby, myself and just cry as long as I need to. Thankfully now I have a 3 year old daughter and a 3 month baby boy. I’m blessed and grateful. A big hug to you Ysis. ✨

  • I had a successful pregnancy 4 years ago. That pregnancy was blissful and looking back, a little naive. Then I had 4 pregnancy losses before having my son 7 months ago. I identify very very strongly with every one of your points. I have lost faith in pregnancy, not just mine but everyone’s. I never feel safe until the baby is out. And I absolutely feel paralyzing fear at ever tempting fate again for a third baby. Both myself and my husband are not prepared to walk that path again. It was so difficult. We feel so blessed to have our 2 healthy, happy babies. Much love.

  • Sending so much love. I totally get this feeling. Last December, I lost a baby at 7 weeks after seeing a healthy heartbeat due to a ruptured ovarian cyst. It still crushes me and I long for more babies. But, we have decided that we won’t grow our family anymore due to the physical and emotional toll our baby loss took on us both. Thank you for sharing this.

  • Thank U for this video. I have fertility issues then finally got pregnant with my miracle baby and lost her at 21 weeks about 3 weeks ago. Nobody around understands not one single person.. so trying to overcome my difficult feelings hence searching for similar stories and seeking empowerment from other women.. Thank U.. God help us. �� �� we will be fine. It’s just that I truly can’t go back to work I feel useless.. and what’s worse is that my partner is really mad about kids so duno if this is gona last coz I can’t just move on and try again after I’m mentally fine coz I have a very low chance of it happening and I’m on the older side now for babies late thirties.. what’s meant to be is meant to be.. I duno anymore.. lots of love from London x

  • Last December, a few days before christmas. I was closing in on my 12 weeks and was finally calmed down thinking something bad would happen. I had a dream i woke up and went to the bathroom, and was bleeding. Well, thats exactly what happened when I woke up from that dream. I went the the ER and was confirmed that no only am I experiencing a silent miscarriage, but i also had twins that my previous ultrasounds didnt show as the other was right behind the other. I had to carry my dead babies for 2 weeks before i had to get a D&C. After the miscarriage i tried to convince my boyfriend to try again with me. He didnt want to. He suddenly didnt want kids with me. I went through (still) severe depression and was shortly diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and Bipolar 1 Disorder. My twins birthday would’ve been the day before mine which is July 20th. My boyfriend and I broke up last June bc of my mental health. He didnt wanna deal with it. He even told me he doesnt wanna have kida with a negative woman like me.

    Every single day i wake up and feel worse. Its gotten to the point that im ready to take my life. Yes im in therapy, i have a psychiatrist. Nothing works. Im ready to give up. My birthday was awful. I specifically asked everyone to not wish me a happy birthday bc it just reminds me that my babies didnt even get to see their birthday.
    People say its gonna get better. I was told to wait about 3 months and itll get easier. Its been 7 months. Im certain that the onlt way out is to end my life. I CANNOT bare living the rest of my life, at 23, with the trauma of losing my kids and the father who i was so in love with. I dont know what to do anymore.

  • I’ve been realizing more and more that I haven’t dealt with the miscarriage I experienced last year. I really appreciate your openness, and sharing with us during your video. I could really relate to many things you said. I sat here crying, my face completely soaked, until I went to look and see the next story that would autoplay after yours. It’s an excerpt of a segment from the Dr. Phil show. It’s entitled, “I have 3 children with my father.” My tears immediately ran back into my eyes, and I realized no matter how bad my situation was, it really could’ve been WORSE. In any event, thanks for sharing your story, and best of luck to your family as you expect your increase.

  • My miscarriage is ending as I type this.. what happened last night, I not only feel every one of those words, but also felt and still feel disgusted just by being a female.. not one soul, not even the doctors, told me what exactly could happen or will happen.. I’m still finding out what’s gonna happen in the future.. but last night was a million awful words..

  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgvYcf2Lxnk listen to this. very great song and lyrics for those who experienced baby loss and miscarriages. very comfortable to hear.

  • Up until I had my miscarriage, losing my father to cancer was the worst thing I have ever been through… suffering pregnancy loss was a grief on an entirely different level. I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks earlier this year and it completely shattered me. I definitely felt a lot of the ways you discuss in this video; I was angry at my body, and scared that it couldn’t do what it was supposed to do. But I also spent a long time just feeling numb, or feeling so indescribably sad. I also felt SO alone. It was the loneliest I have ever felt in my life, and it didn’t help that I shut myself out from all my friends and basically spent all my time alone. All around me people were having babies or getting pregnant, and it just crushed me. I couldn’t be happy for them, and I felt horrible about myself for feeling bitter and resentful.

    It has been several months and a few counseling sessions later and I finally feel more like myself again, but I’m still so scared. We are back to trying, and every month that goes by I feel myself slipping back towards anger and sadness and fear, and it’s awful. I end up hating my body and feeling like I will never get my rainbow baby, and like you said, I am hyper aware of my body. Every little twinge I assume is something else in my body that is failing me. If I had not miscarried, my baby would have been born in the next few weeks. My due date was December 18th, and the closer I get to that date, the more dread I feel. The more I feel like my dream of having a baby will never come true… and the more I feel all that sadness coming back. This has been the hardest year of my entire life.

    So thank you for posting this, and for sharing your story. It really does help to hear other people’s stories and to know that I am not alone. It also helps to see women who have gone on to have their rainbow babies, especially as I creep towards my would-be due date. Pregnancy and infant loss is something that we really need to talk about more, and now that I am more comfortable sharing my story, I want to use it to support other women like you have. It may be painful for me to talk about, but I want to do it anyway because the thought of another woman experiencing that kind of pain and not having a support network to fall back on just breaks my heart. They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I believe that starts from the moment a couple decides to have a baby, because the journey is not always easy.

  • I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ve watched a number of these videos since I miscarried and this was by far the most helpful. �� I pray that you, myself and everyone else is blessed with our beautiful rainbow babies.

  • I am going through with this pain, I conceived after two years of my marriage, I lost my father 3 months ago and now miscarriage,I am so devastated…need prayers….Allah has better plan for me

  • It’s been 5 months since I lost my baby boy he was 13 weeks. Me and my husband just had a bad fight. And I finally broke down. Because next month would have been my due date… It crushes me knowing that I’m still her but little boy isn’t… Things have just been getting worst for me that I think me and my husband should move on in different paths. �� I’m so drained �� thanks for you help it lets me know that I’m not wrong to grieve. I didn’t really grieve when it happened I just suppress it. Until I couldn’t any longer…

  • I just had my third miscarriage and the anxiety has been so bad this time! I don’t remember feeling anxious the first 2 times but the anxiety this time is killing me ������

  • Thank you so much for filming this video. I just had my first miscarriage in August this year. It was also my first pregnancy. I cried through the entire almost two weeks of being pregnant knowing I was going to lose the baby (extremely low betas). It was my first IVF cycle. It’s been almost exactly two months since I miscarried (my doctors never even said the words pregnant to me, that still hurts even now) but I’ve hardly cried since it happened but this last week for whatever reason I’ve been a mess, like as if my brain and heart has finally realized what happened and I’ve found myself crying all the time, especially early in the AM while my husbands asleep. What you said about it not mattering about how far along you are, that your grief is still valid no matter the length of time someone is pregnant was extremely validating for me. I’ve felt very much like my pregnancy didn’t count, that what I had inside me wasn’t seen as a baby yet. But it was my baby. And I loved it desperately. Thank you for filming this. I needed to hear those words from someone who understands.

  • Just lost mine and I’m so sad im angry. Feel like God loves to play jokes. My third miscarriage. I want to punch walls, drown in liquor and pass out.

  • I lost my baby 2 days ago and I’m having such anxiety about being away from home and away from my family. I don’t know how to cope with it but I know that work is going to be long and hard for me.

  • I can’t even talk about my miscarriage with anyone not even my partner.
    I’m terrified to try again it was over 2years since it happened but when people ask why ain’t you trying I feel so angry about it:(
    Thinking of you all ❤️

  • I wanted a little girl so freaking bad and I finally got her. She passed at 24 weeks from hydrops caused by turners. I am not do I g good at all. This video means so much to me because it’s the first one I’ve seen where the speaker openly cried on camera. Your tears are comfort for me. It’s so much harder to watch all these videos trying to make sense of it all and seeing no one get emotional because it makes me feel like I’m wrong for crying in the blink of an eye.

  • I know this video is old but THANK YOU! and yes yes yes to no unsolicited advice. it kills me when my pregnant friends try to do that.

  • I’m so so sorry. I can feel you and your husband. we’re in the same cycle. Me and wife are in the TTC community as well. we’ve been trying for 4 years. my wife got pregnant with her first pregnancy naturally after one year of marriage and ended up with a miscarriage after a year and half we went to a TTC & infertility consultant doctor and she was diagnosed with PCOS and Hypothyroidism. she got pregnant with the 2nd and also ended up with a miscarriage,. after 6 months from the 2nd miscarriage we went back to the same doc and she got pregnant with twins a girl and a boy. we we’re so happy and excited we name them Reema “The Girl” and Saud “The Boy”. we made their room set up and everything. Sadly in my wife’s birthday June 16th 2017 we were celebrating her birthday safely and happy and the water broke and she starts bleeding. we rushed to the hospital and she had an early delivery, the twins were born at 24 weeks. Saud lived only for two days and his sister Reema lived only for 11 days, they passed away. it was the most heartbreaking and saddest moment that happened to us. But we’re not losing hope, so do you, don’t lose it and be patient. our rainbows will come sooner than you think. we’ll pray for you both. stay strong, stay patient. our hearts with you.

  • Jess! I totally felt like that after having Audrey. I had extreme anxiety over something happening to my newborn. I would picture people breaking into my house and trying to rob or hurt us! This went on for months. I have no idea if this was connected to hormones or what but it was a horrible feeling so I know exactly how you feel. I think I was able to finally get out of when I stopped breastfeeding and hormone levels evened out around 8 months postpartum. I’m no doctor obviously but I think that may have been the case for me. With that being said, I still suffer from anxiety from time to time so much so that I get chest pains. The only thing that will get me out of it is calling my husband, or watching a show. You are so busy and have so much going on with the new house, I’m so glad you have that to keep you focused and not distracted. Can’t wait to see your new house! We will be moving soon too and are so excited!

  • Kelsie I know how hard it is to make a video about this and just wanted to tell you that you did such a great job explaining what we go through mentally with the loss of our babies. Thank you for being you. You have inspired me in so many ways during my TTC journey! Lots of love, Brittany

  • Thank you so much for making this video. You described perfectly how so many of us feel but are afraid to voice. I suffered a loss at five weeks and encountered a few who tried to downplay it and simply didn’t Understand. We grieve silently but should thank you for shedding light and this painful topic

  • I’m just now watching this, mostly because I needed to heed the trigger warning for the past couple weeks. This was so brave for you to make this. Although I haven’t experienced a miscarriage, I struggle greatly with mental health, and I haven’t been able to sit down and film something with this level of vulnerability yet. Girl, you are so strong, and you know we are all here for you, cheering you on! ♥️✨

  • I needed this. My husband and I lost our first child in the 1st trimesterthe same day his sister in law announced she was pregnant to the family. I decided to suffer in silence, because I didn’t want to take away from the happiness and joy of her expecting her first child. (No one knew we were expecting yet). We were blessed with our amazing rainbow baby not long after (I thank Him daily for His goodness), but I was stuck with this…guilt of still grieving over my lost angel, especially with the frequent comment of, “Yeah, well, at least you HAVE a child now.” And while, yes, having my rainbow baby does help make it easier to cope, it has not taken away the pain and sadness I still feel over my loss. I don’t know why, but I’ve just always imagined that it was a baby boy. Just a gut feeling. This video was very freeing for me. Thank you for your courage and encouragement. It is such a relief to hear that it’s okay for me to still grieve for my angel baby, and that I don’t have to feel guilty for it. I know you have a bunch of other people saying it, but thank you, thank you, thank you, for having the strength to tackle this and be so vulnerable and open.
    -Much love ��

  • I also lost my baby around the same time. I found out on Feb. 3rd we were pregnant with our first baby (2 days after you) and our baby was due October 11th. I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s an awful feeling. You’re so strong for making these videos and for uniting us woman who have suffered these loses. Thank you and I pray you and your husband will have a healthy baby very soon. Sending my love.

  • I came across your video of your tww symptoms. I went into the description and watched the one where you get your positive test. I BAWLED MY EYES OUT. I was SO happy for you. I’m so sorry you had to face this pain again after trying for so long… I’m hoping and praying you and your husband get your rainbow.

  • I was also due in October and miscarried in April. I was 12 weeks. It was horrific and heartbreaking. It has honestly broken me. I pray you find comfort.

  • Thank you so much for posting this. I had a very early loss this past March, and haven’t been able to talk to anyone about it. When it happened, those who I was leaning on were less than helpful (to put it nicely). I’ve been made to feel like I shouldn’t be grieving since it was so early, and I had begun to think that way too. We’ve been trying for nearly five years and that was the first time I’d ever even seen those two little lines… I can’t describe the relief and joy we felt. Then it was over so quickly. It’s hard for me to find people in my personal life who understand, but I have been blessed by the infertility community. I just want you to know that this video means a lot, and I’m sure it wasn’t easy to make. So thank you.

  • Thank you for sharing. Nobody understands the way other women who are ttc understand. Ive just started following your story. This video meant a lot to me, getting some affirmation of emotions and ways of thinking that Ive struggled with after a loss. Wish I could give you a big hug! Baby dust and best wishes!

  • You’re beautiful and watching your videos make me a bit happier and hopeful on my ttc journey. I have never had a miscarriage, but I’ve been trying since middle of 2015 to conceive, so I can empathise with you. I’m so sorry you’ve gone through losing pregnancies, I hope you get you’re miracle baby soon ��

  • I’m so sorry to hear about your troubles. It’s such a difficult thing to go through.
    My favorite part of this video is Your son fishing with your husband it was such a tender and sweet moment.
    Will say prayers for you and your family during this time.

  • thank you from the bottom of my heart for this video. This video helped me to shed some tears over my miscarriage. I had reacted by numbing out over my loss because my family purposefully pretty much downplayed and barely mentioned my miscarriage (my sister told me that was my mom’s strategy in talking to me about it. Um,…..like I’m a mindless idiot who will just forget I lost my baby because my mom stops mentioning it??) So I buried my feelings. You had so many amazing insights here, you would make a great counselor.

  • I also suffered a miscarriage last september 2016 and until now that i’m pregnant again ang due to give birth to our rainbowbaby this coming september,I still remember my 1st baby. Don’t lose hope,take all the time to grieve but find something that will make you happy like your spouse and family that loves you…

  • Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing. I lost my first 4 weeks ago and I know I’ll never forget that baby. I’m sorry for your losses. I pray you have healthy pregnancies and babies in the future!!

  • You are amazing!!
    I’m at a point that i’ve been through all the stages of feelings that you mentioned by now. It’s so hard to feel this way!
    specially when everyone around me is getting pregnant and you really do want to be good and to feel happy for them. genuinely. Most of the people around me don’t know what i’m going through, because i don’t want them to pity me. maybe it’s ego that i need to set free, and just another phase that i need to cross in the ‘feeling scale’. for now i just want to say a BIG THANK U!! it helped a lot: )

  • Thank you for these words! I wish I could go through the screen and give you a big hug! I was due October 31-2017 and a piece of my heart is missing. And I’ve been very depressed and empty. I’m praying for you! And again thank you so much for these words!!!! Sending many prayers and blessings from above….��❤️��

  • You’re amazing for doing this video. I can only imagine how hard it would be and people like you help others to see things in a different light and gain a better understanding. Its extremely admirable!

  • My heart hurts for you…that you have had to go through this. Sometimes the “whys” in life are just unexplainable. You are an inspiration! I am so glad I found your channel so I can witness the beautiful journey of you becoming a mother! ❤️

  • we are so proud of you for making this video. it’s ok to talk about it and we should bring awareness to this tragedy because people do get affected. my heart goes out to you. stay strong

  • I was also due in October and lost my baby right around the same time as you. That’s how I came a crossed your channel. I find it hard to talk about, thanks for being brave and making this video. I wish you all the best.

  • Thank you for making this video. I’ve suffered 2 miscarriages and I had no support. My husband shut down and still refuses to talk about them. I hope no one who suffers a miscarriage has to suffer the way I did. Praying for you and God bless you ❤

  • Love you Kelsie! �� I’ve been following you for many years, since disney days, and I feel like we’re friends. Every time I’m talking about your videos or your channel I say my friend, and then say from You Tube. I commend you for being brave and making this video along with all of your TTC videos. You’re such an inspiration. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. You’re completely right, it’s not a competition and no one should judge anyone. While I haven’t personally experienced a miscarriage, you’re right I can’t even imagine what it feels like, my best friend has had two, && also had two beautiful daughters, so have faith. Thank you for your advice on how to be there for others. I’m hoping/planning to start my TTC journey in the near future and as someone with PCOS, I know it might be a difficult road, and I just want to say thank you for everything, because I feel like I have your support already and I haven’t even started, and that means a lot to me. God bless you! xoxo. _Emily Marie

  • Thanks for your courage and openness in this vlog. Pregnancy loss and fertility anxieties can take a woman’s mental health to the brink. Thanks for talking about it. Wishing you your hearts desires.

  • I love this video. I lost my baby 1 month ago. And I cant talk with no one because I am young (20) and people on college are usually more interested about other things. It has really changed me and my perception about life… I really wanted to have this baby with my man and I feel really sad and lost, especially now when my routine has come back after summer vacation. And thank you so much for this video. And to the other women out there, you are not alone. Lots of love ❤️

  • I completely understand your hesitation to even allow yourself to be happy or excited. That being said, when I saw your announcement I literally cried and praised JESUS! hallelujah! So excited for you!

  • I didn’t know. This must be very hard to go through and I like how you explain this so clearly. It’s ok to feel what you felt. It’s definitely great to be so aware and simply feel whatever it is that you feel and honor it. Talking about this is so important especially for other moms going through this!

  • Thank you for making this video, I know how difficult it was for you. I’ve suffered two miscarriages as well. Sending you lots of hugs ��

  • Forgot to add… I am praying for you, my twin sister, and myself. We are hoping for only good things to come in the NEAR future. I can tell that you would be a phenomenal mother.

  • KelsieThank you for doing this video. I could never do it. Thanks for being the voice for all of us. I watch your videos all the time and it helps me so much. I am sure I speak for everyone tuning in. Thanks for really keeping it real.

  • you are one of my favorite YouTube people.. you will have a healthy pregnancy.

    not sure if you religious or open to a wonderful podcast I listened to after my miscarriage it’s called Sarah’s laughter…

    I will pray for you girl.

    stay strong love

  • Kelsey, this might sound strange… But your words were so good to hear. I felt at home, understood, embraced… just could see myself saying absolutely every word that came ouy of your mouth.

    Thank you for being raw.
    Thank you for communicating the words that at times feel trapped in my throat.
    Thank you for being fearless of sharing your feelings.

    Keep doing what you do because you are (and will) changing people’s lives slowly.

    Xoxo!

    Ps. You are not alone! We are not alone!

  • I recently just lost my first born in the womb i was almost 2 months pregnant and never really knew in my mind due to being on CBD for my Anxiety and ptsd but my body was going through it all even the miscarriage til my doctor finally told me I lost my son and what caused my miscarriage was the birth control switch which my doctor did without testing me to see if I was pregnant I soon felt a sharp pain in my stomach when i got the new birth control than came that heavy bleeding and the feeling of wanting to throw upand nausea and I just thought it was a period til this past Wednesday which was the doctor appointment was his error that killed my child and will hold him accountable for this should have tested me to see if i’m pregnant which he never did he just gave me the birth control and sent me on my way

  • U really hit all the spots! Thanks for this vid.. I lost my girl at 21 weeks a couple of weeks ago.. trying to keep sane n functioning.. lots of love to everyone out there x

  • Thank you! Today I’m feeling exactly all of that, and I just really needed someone to understand how I was feeling.
    I had a missed miscarriage two months ago.

  • I’ve been feeling all of that. Thank you so much for this video. I thought I was going crazy. I felt guilty for feeling that I was overreacting but then that I was underreacting to make other people happy, work life, family life, friend life, they all still want you there even when your going thru this horrible experience and you try to stay strong for them when in reality, you need to take the time to grieve. And you’re one thousand percent right, it’s a memory you will hold until the day you pass.

  • Hi Shelly…thank you for the video. I lost my baby through an ectopic pregnancy last year July 2019. My first pregnancy, after doctors told me I’ll have a lot of trouble getting pregnant due to PCOS.I had to have emergency surgery to remove baby and tube. My bf was very supportive and was there for me until Christmas and by January he broke up with me. Apparently he couldnt deal wtih the loss and me almost dying.Which hit me like a ton of bricks. I would have had baby early January of this year (2020). I feel very alone and very ashamed and all the emotions you’ve mentioned. I dont know what to do at this point. As I am now grieving for 2 persons I love.

  • Thank you for this video! This is exactly how I am feeling. I am two weeks post miscarriage and I have felt so crazy….all of the things you discussed. This made me feel so much less alone! Love and light to you!❤️Thank you for being so open and brave!

  • You explained everything I feel or still feel! I thought I was overreacting or overthinking but you really help me feel normal with how I’m feeling! And I absolutely agree with you no one will truly know and is ever going to know how you feel! Love this video!!:)

  • 53 days…. and The one word for me is “empty.” Thank you for posting this! You are very strong and your babies in heaven are proud of their mommy and know they are loved!

  • Thank you thank you thank a million times! I thought I was crazy and selfish for feeling ALL of the feelings that you named. This helps a lot!��❤️❤️❤️

  • This is it…I feel pure rage, and jealousy at times..I cant control it..I dont know how..I lost my twin girls at 19 weeks..november 17th and November 18th..I just recently miscarried a week ago I took an early test and started bleeding the next day..I feel like no one cares..April 11th is my twins due date and I am having the hardest time carrying on with life..thank you for this video.

  • I totally understand the anxiety. Your house looks like it’s going to be beautiful! I need those Rae Dunn measuring cups & that fluff laundry sign. Thanks for sharing ��

  • Just watched this after my second pregnancy/miscarriage in a row. I was feeling so hopeless and low before I stumbled upon your incredibly inspiring channel. I feel so much less alone. Thank you for bringing me hope ❤❤❤ You are a goddess!

  • New subscribersending you so many positive vibes during your TTC journey and hoping you get your rainbow baby soon. Thank you for sharing and documenting your journey so others do not have to feel so alone. I lost two pregnancies before having our third child and felt many of the things you describe.

  • I had bad anxiety after my miscarriages… I know exactly what you mean. I pray you don’t experience any more heartache and that is over and done with! Your house is going to be amaaaazing and I love the updates! Your new clubhouse and pool is beautiful ������

  • I lost a little girl to s.i.d.s. 30 yrs.ago. i had two other children at the time and i was the same way. Take your time and slowly deal with the issues. It will work out for you. Take care and ill send a prayer your way. Love from Iowa. Julie

  • This video is everything! Thank you! This is 100% accurate ❤️ We will have our babies.���� This journey has been the hardest and the loneliest.��

  • I have been going through so much anxiety an depression since the loss of our first child (12-16-16). We were ttc for 8 years and my one word would have to be “shattered” bc that is exactly what happened the very moment we were told in the emergency room that we were having a miscarriage.. my heart.. my whole world shattered… I am still unable to figure out how to put it back together again. I love this video! Even though my miscarriage isn’t “fresh” all the emotions, pain, and memories still are. I keep everything bottled up bc no one seemed to want to listen and would just tell me to move on. Thank you for making this video especially as hard as it was to make! I am sharing this! Love to you!

  • Oh how exciting to be able to see your house come together. Thank you for being so frank about your anxiety. Yes in ways, everyone has anxiety.

  • Can completely to relate to the anxiety, you’re doing everything right with how you’re handling it! Always keeping you guys in my thoughts ��

  • A week ago today I ended up starting to miscarry my second in a row within 6 months. It’s so draining. We have been trying since late 2015. So I feel you. Praying for you. I so agree about the completion thing!

  • Jessica, Miles’ little sibling will come “in God’s perfect timing.” Just try to remember, and I know it’s hard, that God is in control. He wants the best for us and His timing is always right. Love and blessings from Atlanta. Jeremiah 29:11

  • Your anxiety is totally understandable and justifiable. Don’t rush yourself to try for a rainbow baby until you’re ready girly! Thinking of you!!

  • The community you’re building your house in is absolutely gorgeous!!! �� keeping your family in my thoughts as you go through this tough time! I hope after the storm comes your rainbow ❤️

  • Awww so sorry. I’ve been there/am there. We lost our first pregnancy and for me a lot the fears never went away. A miscarriage changes you and will probably change your future pregnancy’s too. ❤️

  • thank you for sharing. I don’t cry much too and when I do I hate it and only cry when I’m alone. I feel like it’s useless and a waste of time lol. Can’t wait to meet the baby:)

  • Emptiness, sadness, anxiety, grief is what I feel now, 6 weeks after misscarriage and only the hope, that one day it all be over helps me go through the day.

  • I really like how u did those video diaries… I’m so happy that you have used something so awful that happened to you for good now because I truly believe that God will use you to help other women in some way… always keeping you and baby number 2 in my prayers and can’t wait to hold him/her in 3 months!