This is a highlight moment from the sermon “Your, Mine, Ours (The Blended Family)” by David D. Ireland, Ph.D.. Watch the full sermon on Vimeo here: http://vimeo.com/christchurchusa/blendedfamily. Visit our website at: http://www.ChristChurchUSA.org. Follow @ChristChurchUSA on Twitter at: http://twitter.com/ChristChurchUSA. To make a donation visit: http://www.ChristChurchUSA.org/give. This is a Christ Church production.
Step moms (and step fathers, for that matter) do not have a sterling reputation. What is the best way to enter into the life of your new spouse’s kids? Is it easier for men or women? Is it easier if it’s a step-son or a step-daughter? Harville Hendrix and our panel of experts discuss how to best blend a family.
Trying to bond in a blended family, and let’s just face it, everyone is different. When we think of the best relationships in our lives, those relationships are strong because of our experiences together. Being creative and thinking of new ways of doing the same old things will allow new memories, new stories and gives our children and stepchildren a chance to create bonds. Even if your children are adults, experiences help bond blended families together.
In this video we’ll discuss tips on how create strong bonds and make parenting in blended families a smoother and easier transition.. For private consultations: Email: [email protected] To Donate: https://www.paypal.me/learnbyj
Thank you for watching this video from The Simplifiers Podcast! New interviews are published every Tuesday and Friday! Subscribe to the channel today: https://bit.ly/subscribetoTheSimplifiers. ——. Q: if you’re finding yourself on the other side of divorce, you might be wondering, how in the world do you build love together (once again) in blended families? Is it possible? Is it worth it? Or is that all just a pipe dream? My special guest today is licensed marriage and family therapist, Ron L. Deal and he’s simplifying how to build love together in blended families. That’s where two adults fall in love and bring children into the mix from previous relationships… blended all together.. Sounds complicated, right? Well, what a perfect topic to simplify, then! My special guest today is Ron L. Deal and he’s simplifying how to build love in blended families.. We tackle all aspects of it, including: *What the dynamics are inside a stepfamily that makes love so tricky. *How to apply the 5 Love Languages to each person in your blended family. *The “5 P’s of Step-Parenting” are: *Partner. *Pursue. *Pace. *Patience. *Persistence (and Prayer!). *How to tackle any underlying grief that might be happening underneath it all. …and some top tips for those couples who’ve decided to separate and become co-parents. Ron wrote this book in tandem with Dr. Gary Chapman, a friend and fan-favorite of the show… so I knew I wanted to have him on to continue the conversation. Because as you know, what happens at home also affects how you show up at work. So, let’s simplify this! Q: Are you struggling with how to build love in your blended family situation? If yes, this one is for you.. It’s time to #DoTheThing! -- Show notes available with all LINKS mentioned here: https://thesimplifiers.com/podcast/ron-deal-how-to-build-love-blended-families. -- Episode sponsored by…. Goodboy Creative. Delegate your brand’s social media marketing to Goodboy Creative and simplify your life! Book a free discovery call today: https://www.goodboycreative.co/simple. (And make sure to tell them The Simplifiers sent ya!). You can follow Mary at: Website: thesimplifiers.com. Facebook: facebook.com/thesimplifiers. Twitter: twitter.com/thesimplifiers. Instagram: instagram.com/thesimplifiers/. Snapchat: snapchat.com/add/thesimplifiers. Mary Baird-Wilcock, CSEP the CEO of The Simplifiers has one goal in mind… to help you SIMPLIFY your life.. With over 16+ years experience in running a small business, she coaches creative entrepreneurs on how to simplify and optimize the operations side of running their small business.. Mary is the host of The Simplifiers Podcast, where she interviews very smart people from all over the world who take topics in business and in life and SIMPLIFIES them.. An international public speaker who’s been published in FORBES Magazine, Huffington Post and featured as one of the “Top 25 Young Event Pros to Watch” by Special Events Magazine, Mary is also on a mission to share the gospel of what a Texas breakfast taco is all about.
Hey Cousins! In this Blended Conventions we touched on the topic of “How to make the blended family work!” We discussed our Top 3 factors to successfully becoming a blended family. We hope that by analyzing these areas and discussing them with your partner your journey to “Blended” will be a lot smoother and enjoyable!. Tanita: Instagram https://www.instagram.com/nita_fonzarelli/. Darian: Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sameole_d/. The Bryants: Instagram https://www.instagram.com/blendedbryants/. Facebook https://www.facebook.com/blendedbryants. SHARE, LIKE, and SUBSCRIBE. BE SURE TO HIT THAT BELL. SPAM OUR COMMENTS BELOW…
Blending families has its own set of challenges associated, so we’re here to help you find out what works. Start with shared interests and work your way down until your new family, is stronger than ever. It’s tougher than it sounds, but the reward in the end— is sweeter as can be. Making Blended Families Blend: Creating Bonds.
Some activities to do with kids in a blended family may involve educational tours or games that help boost mental processes along with building stronger bonds. As you engage your kids in such activities, you allow them to become more creative. You also create an environment that is conducive to learning. If you are just entering stepfamily life, you may notice that age and gender differences may affect the bond that you have with your stepchildren.The physical and emotional needs of a 3 year old are varied from that of a 13 year old.
Realizing those differences is a first step in acknowledging the situation and making efforts to further the relationship with each of the children involved. When it comes to growing up or raising a blended family, there will be challenges. or letting new siblings bond, understanding these nuances can help foster even stronger. Maintaining marriage quality in a blended family. While newly remarried couples without children can use their first months together to build on their relationship, couples in a blended family are often more consumed with their kids than each other. But focusing on building a strong marital bond will ultimately benefit everyone, including the children.
9 Strategies For Making A Blended Family Blend. Is your blended family just like The Brady Bunch? Probably not, because it’s not easy to combine two families into a new unit. Welcoming a new spouse brings with it an explosion of stress-inducing newness, with new stepchildren, new rules, new demands, new religious practices and more. Though.
Stepdads and Blended Families The learnings in this article series are based on our research and years of experience supporting fathers and father-figures. But the fact is, everyone’s situation is different, so feel free to be creative, and adapt our wisdom to suit your circumstances. To create a strong blended family you need to establish rules and a routine. The rules should be discussed between the spouses’ prior to bringing them up with the kids. Both parents need to be on board with the rules.
At first, they should be simple to help create a bond with your family. Routines should also be established. Tom North, of the famous blended Beardsley family, reveals the real story behind the happy pictures-a tale of disconnection and abuse. / 10 Tips to Help Develop a Strong Family Bond.
A childfree family may have pets instead of children, or be like a parent to their nieces, nephews, or other family members. Blended Family. When a nuclear family ends up divorcing and marrying someone else, the new family is called a blended or step family.
Stepmoms, stepdads, stepbrothers, step sisters, and other members enter the fray.
List of related literature:
To help the new relationship develop, it may be beneficial for stepparents and children to spend time in subgroups (e.g., parents alone, children with their own parents, and children with stepparents).
We have had equal success in recommending that children initiate change in order to help their parents; all other close or “bonded” relationships, including husband/wife and even close friends, also work in this same way.
Overall, blended families adapt more easily and children show better adjustment when stepparents build a warm friendship with the child and adopt their new roles slowly rather than rushing or forcing relationships (Doodson & Morley, 2006).
As I touched on in the last chapter, in healthy, happy stepfamilies, a specific role division where the biological parent is more of the disciplinarian and limit-setter while the stepparent is the nurturer promotes family bonding and harmony.
Nevertheless, professional counselors should prepare to work with stepparents and children in blended families with familial issues (e.g., rejection) tantamount to heterosexual step and blended families.
Spending focused time with each parent—especially the mother—can help alleviate the older child’s feelings of displacement and help the adjustment to being the new older brother or sister.
Overall, blended families adapt more easily and children show better adjustment when stepparents build a warm friendship with the child and slowly adopt their new roles (Doodson & Morley, 2006).
Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.
My husband said he would take care of me and my son. My new husband can’t stand my son. My son and I have been traveling through life on our own. My husband gets pissed and can’t stand us being in the same room.
I worked on myself through counseling before I with held a relationship.
My husband doesn’t understand I love my son heart and soul.
My husband also inflicts jealousy of my son.
I never would of married my husband if I knew this.
I jumped in to this. I pray god well I know god will see us all through it.
One more thing.
My husband SHADOWS EVERYTHING I MEAN EVERYTHING I DO.
Cross my legs he crosses my legs,. Anything he is my shadow. It’s a positive thing but is getting creepy
It’s not hard to deal with step kids! The problem is when the SD is jealous and being brainwashed coming over and being disrespectful toward their fathers new spouse. It gets worse when the SD father doesn’t acknowledge it right then and there. Instead the father says Your The Issue!!! Man I’m done with this guy and his kids!
I preface my comment by saying I am not a believer so I am not being disingenuous. I know this man personally. I met him while I was a believer. I worked under him on a ministry staff. That was years ago. To this day, who’s influence and input in my life was and has benefited me personally. He is a good man who loves his wife. I may not share the same beliefs as he does anymore but that does not change the fact that he is a man of integrity, period. He is what I believe a Christian should be like if they were really representing their faith of love and kindness. Larry and his wife.
I don’t have step children but I’m divorced and a good chance is that my spouse will have children. I’m preparing myself for what’s to come and be the best I can be.
well I guess my step parents is just going to have to hate my guts and want me to jump off of a bridge because what you’re teaching and all these other people are teaching is not even close to biblical God didn’t say oh yeah your the stepparent you have no say you have no say let the kids do whatever the hell they want this is New Age parenting and it’s sickening this kind of garbage didn’t take place in the 80s or in the 70s or 60s for that matter but is taking place now it’s new age parenting let the children do what they want we don’t want to hurt their feelings we don’t want them to resent the step parent who cares if the children or teenagers hate the step parent the step parents job is to help the biological parent in the role of discipline not just sit on the sidelines and say your kids are your problem that’s stupid scripture those who do not discipline their children it proves you don’t care about them so basically what you’re trying to tell everybody and all the morons that agree with you I don’t care about that kids I don’t care how they turn out there not my problem people are so stupid those kids are going to have a 40 over them their whole life not just at home your bosses have authority over you government has authority over you judges and police officers have authority over you and never ends
This is very helpful but I don’t see a problem with the ex spouse being friendly. We have had my husbands ex-wife stay with us for Mardi Gras or Easter with the kids in the guest room because we spent the holiday all together. It was a way for both parents to spend time with the kids for a holiday and they still got to see my son, their little brother. I think each family has to do what is best. Whenever there was a disagreement they would just use the court order to solve it if they couldn’t. The thing is, who is most important is the children. And they need both their parents. I don’t have any issue with my husband speaking with his ex-wife about the kids and stuff.
This is so informative, wish I had watched this before I got married, my blended family is like oil and water because our two sets of children just don’t mix, my spouse and I are always in disagreement as it relates to our children, I’m a disciplinarian, I believe in punishment, or sanctions for misbehaving, that’s how I grew my kids but he’s totally complacent, no punishment or sanctions for misbehaving at all, I try to get everyone together by openly talking to my kids in front of him, but everything he does, as it relates to his kids, are done in private, behind close door. Those are some of the things that cause us to not blend, I’m almost at my wits end
I love you you point out how complex the children are! So true! We always talk about dealing with our children in our podcast/videos because as Blended Familys, it is more then just two parents! Thank you for this sermon!
1-3 years…..I am sorry. I hate all this sensitivity on step-children. I do not need to ease into raising step-children. They just need to get with it. Step-children get the immediate benefit of me paying for things, or driving them around, or cooking and cleaning for them. Why should any adult have to wait 1-3 years to run their house. As a step-mom I am the adult. Period. Americans need to stop coddling these skids. That’s why most of them are entitled brats.
![116: How to build love in blended families with Ron L. Deal [EXTENDED VERSION]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mF8jl0fOPrU/hqdefault.jpg "116: How to build love in blended families with Ron L. Deal [EXTENDED VERSION]")
My husband said he would take care of me and my son. My new husband can’t stand my son. My son and I have been traveling through life on our own. My husband gets pissed and can’t stand us being in the same room.
I worked on myself through counseling before I with held a relationship.
My husband doesn’t understand I love my son heart and soul.
My husband also inflicts jealousy of my son.
I never would of married my husband if I knew this.
I jumped in to this. I pray god well I know god will see us all through it.
One more thing.
My husband SHADOWS EVERYTHING I MEAN EVERYTHING I DO.
Cross my legs he crosses my legs,. Anything he is my shadow. It’s a positive thing but is getting creepy
Great sermon! Step parenting is such a hard topic to talk on! Especially when people have never played the role! People just don’t get us!
It’s not hard to deal with step kids! The problem is when the SD is jealous and being brainwashed coming over and being disrespectful toward their fathers new spouse. It gets worse when the SD father doesn’t acknowledge it right then and there. Instead the father says Your The Issue!!! Man I’m done with this guy and his kids!
I preface my comment by saying I am not a believer so I am not being disingenuous.
I know this man personally. I met him while I was a believer. I worked under him on a ministry staff. That was years ago. To this day, who’s influence and input in my life was and has benefited me personally. He is a good man who loves his wife. I may not share the same beliefs as he does anymore but that does not change the fact that he is a man of integrity, period. He is what I believe a Christian should be like if they were really representing their faith of love and kindness. Larry and his wife.
I don’t have step children but I’m divorced and a good chance is that my spouse will have children. I’m preparing myself for what’s to come and be the best I can be.
well I guess my step parents is just going to have to hate my guts and want me to jump off of a bridge because what you’re teaching and all these other people are teaching is not even close to biblical God didn’t say oh yeah your the stepparent you have no say you have no say let the kids do whatever the hell they want this is New Age parenting and it’s sickening this kind of garbage didn’t take place in the 80s or in the 70s or 60s for that matter but is taking place now it’s new age parenting let the children do what they want we don’t want to hurt their feelings we don’t want them to resent the step parent who cares if the children or teenagers hate the step parent the step parents job is to help the biological parent in the role of discipline not just sit on the sidelines and say your kids are your problem that’s stupid scripture those who do not discipline their children it proves you don’t care about them so basically what you’re trying to tell everybody and all the morons that agree with you I don’t care about that kids I don’t care how they turn out there not my problem people are so stupid those kids are going to have a 40 over them their whole life not just at home your bosses have authority over you government has authority over you judges and police officers have authority over you and never ends
This is very helpful but I don’t see a problem with the ex spouse being friendly. We have had my husbands ex-wife stay with us for Mardi Gras or Easter with the kids in the guest room because we spent the holiday all together. It was a way for both parents to spend time with the kids for a holiday and they still got to see my son, their little brother. I think each family has to do what is best. Whenever there was a disagreement they would just use the court order to solve it if they couldn’t. The thing is, who is most important is the children. And they need both their parents. I don’t have any issue with my husband speaking with his ex-wife about the kids and stuff.
This is so informative, wish I had watched this before I got married, my blended family is like oil and water because our two sets of children just don’t mix, my spouse and I are always in disagreement as it relates to our children, I’m a disciplinarian, I believe in punishment, or sanctions for misbehaving, that’s how I grew my kids but he’s totally complacent, no punishment or sanctions for misbehaving at all, I try to get everyone together by openly talking to my kids in front of him, but everything he does, as it relates to his kids, are done in private, behind close door. Those are some of the things that cause us to not blend, I’m almost at my wits end
I love you you point out how complex the children are! So true! We always talk about dealing with our children in our podcast/videos because as Blended Familys, it is more then just two parents! Thank you for this sermon!
1-3 years…..I am sorry. I hate all this sensitivity on step-children. I do not need to ease into raising step-children. They just need to get with it. Step-children get the immediate benefit of me paying for things, or driving them around, or cooking and cleaning for them. Why should any adult have to wait 1-3 years to run their house. As a step-mom I am the adult. Period.
Americans need to stop coddling these skids. That’s why most of them are entitled brats.