How you can Know If You are a Helicopter Parent


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Signs That You Are A Helicopter Parent

Video taken from the channel: The Mental Breakdown


Helicopter Parenting | Effects of Helicopter Parenting

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Here’s how to tell if you’re what’s known as a helicopter parent. What It Means to Be a Helicopter Parent The term “helicopter parents” is often used to define a group of parents who engage in the practice of over-parenting. Helicopter parenting is not the same as intensive parenting One reason I am so confused about whether or not I am a helicopter parent is because the definition of it is unclear.

But some common signs of helicopter parenting include: Doing your child’s schoolwork – You don’t necessarily have to be writing your child’s essays for them to be doing too Fighting your child’s battles – You may not be duking it out on the playground. Helicopter Parents may also feel peer-pressure from other parents, seeing the tendency of others parents to intervene often can make them feel they need to do the same for their kids. Signs You’re. Here are 5 ways to tell if you’re “helicoptering” (doing too much) and what to do about it: You give your children a task and, because they don’t do it well, you do it yourself or fix it. You are on the phone weekly (if not daily) because your children are missing assignments.

If you think you may be suffocating your children, here are some signs that you’re a helicopter parent who needs to get their anxiety in check. 1. You Pick Out Your Kids Clothes It’s okay to pick out your children’s clothes for the first few years, but if you’re still picking out your preteen or teenager’s clothes, you need to stop!Helicopter parenting has various causes, and sometimes, there are deep-seated issues at the root of this style. Knowing this can help you understand why someone (or yourself) has a. Like most bad habits, breaking out of Helicopter Parenting hasn’t been easy.

But I’ve come a long way enough to consider myself a reformed Helicopter Parent now. Here are a few things that helped me – 1. Take stock. The first thing I did was to look at what I was doing for him that he could and should be doing for himself.

Here’s how to tell if you’re a helicopter parent, along with expert advice to curb the hovering. By Kate Bayless Updated December 05, 2019. How do you know if you’re a helicopter parent?

If the following items describe you, then you’re probably overmanaging your child’s life: You are in constant contact with your child. Cell phones have led to frequent communication between parents and children.

List of related literature:

There is even a term for this: helicopter parent.

“What We Say Matters: Practicing Nonviolent Communication” by Ike Lasater, Judith Hanson Lasater
from What We Say Matters: Practicing Nonviolent Communication
by Ike Lasater, Judith Hanson Lasater
Shambhala, 2016

In fact, I was the opposite of the helicopter parent.

“Beyond Soap: The Real Truth About What You Are Doing to Your Skin and How to Fix It for a Beautiful, Healthy Glow” by Sandy Skotnicki, Christopher Shulgan
from Beyond Soap: The Real Truth About What You Are Doing to Your Skin and How to Fix It for a Beautiful, Healthy Glow
by Sandy Skotnicki, Christopher Shulgan
Penguin Canada, 2018

Over the past few years, researchers have begun to systematically study helicopter parents.

“Parenting: A Dynamic Perspective” by George W. Holden
from Parenting: A Dynamic Perspective
by George W. Holden
SAGE Publications, 2019

This doesn’t mean you have to be a helicopter parent and monitor your child’s every activity, but if he or she expresses an interest in something, and if there’s a way to show your support for that interest, it’s probably a good idea to do so.

“Relentless Spirit: The Unconventional Raising of a Champion” by Missy Franklin, D.A. Franklin, Dick Franklin, Daniel Paisner
from Relentless Spirit: The Unconventional Raising of a Champion
by Missy Franklin, D.A. Franklin, et. al.
Penguin Publishing Group, 2016

They’ve been labeled helicopter parents, because they hover over their kids and make sure they get everything they need all the time.

“Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes: Removing Cultural Blinders to Better Understand the Bible” by E. Randolph Richards, Brandon J. O'Brien
from Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes: Removing Cultural Blinders to Better Understand the Bible
by E. Randolph Richards, Brandon J. O’Brien
InterVarsity Press, 2012

Many times when I speak publicly about the independence-dependence dynamic, I get asked about “helicopter parenting.”

“Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up” by Vanessa Lapointe, Dr. Laura Markham
from Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up
by Vanessa Lapointe, Dr. Laura Markham
LifeTree Media, 2015

Ever hear of the phrase “helicopter parent?”

“Mindsets for Parents: Strategies to Encourage Growth Mindsets in Kids” by Mary Cay Ricci, Margaret Lee
from Mindsets for Parents: Strategies to Encourage Growth Mindsets in Kids
by Mary Cay Ricci, Margaret Lee
Sourcebooks, 2016

You’ve probably heard the term “helicopter parent.”

“Lies Women Believe: And the Truth that Sets Them Free” by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Elisabeth Elliot
from Lies Women Believe: And the Truth that Sets Them Free
by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Elisabeth Elliot
Moody Publishers, 2018

Don’t be a helicopter parent.

“The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People” by Judith Orloff
from The Empath’s Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People
by Judith Orloff
Sounds True, 2017

They show up in our households: Are you a helicopter parent or more laid-back?

“Rule Makers, Rule Breakers: Tight and Loose Cultures and the Secret Signals That Direct Our Lives” by Michele Gelfand
from Rule Makers, Rule Breakers: Tight and Loose Cultures and the Secret Signals That Direct Our Lives
by Michele Gelfand
Scribner, 2019

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  • I never wanna be a parent like this. My parents were real nice and they gave me freedom but if i did some dumb shit they let me know.

  • What happened to these parents when they were younger to make them act like this? My parents were extremely strict on the “no-dating,” thing with me (among MANY other things).

    But come to find out my mom liked attention from boys had her heart broken many times. And my Dad liked to sleep around in his younger days. So I guess they were trying to protect me. I just wish they would have been more honest with me about why I couldn’t date and not just a resounding no.

    I also found out with my dad’s previous marriage, he was very lax and didn’t care what his kids did. The second time around he decided he was going to be more involved by being overprotective.

    I’m not saying the parents have a good reason to be helicopter parents, but there is a story as to why. I only found out all this information after I married. I feel bad for all these kids/adults being watched over by over zealous parents. It breaks my heart, because I know the feeling of loneliness and the boredom that accompanies it.

    Now that I’m a parent, I’m trying to find the line of being overprotective and letting them figure things out on their own. Like, yes you can go over to the neighbors house to play, but I don’t know their parents that well, so please play outside.

    I do second guess myself though. Like is that being overprotective? Was my explanation not enough? Too much? Did I discipline too harshly? Too lightly?

    To all those kids who were or are overprotected, it gets better once you out from under your parent’s thumb. You will be able to think and do things for yourself. It will take time, but you will be amazed at what you’re capable of.

  • I was given a huge amount of independence as a child, my business was my business and I took care of it. I can’t really imagine family telling me what to do. It just wouldn’t compute. I never had a curfew and there were no rules. I didn’t have friends and I loved studying so it all worked out I guess. I wish they had helped me more with things that I struggled with, like getting homework done on time and remaining dedicated when work is tough or dull. But I became very confident at my ability to solve my own problems.

  • Yes they r, these ppl r creating sjw freaks n ruining our civilization with weak minded fools who run to the Democrat side n become blm protestors or more than 2 genders ideots who r so up in their own bs they cant even c that they r the problem

  • TLDR: lots of resentment and the second they are out of sight they crash and burn because they do way too much of what they were denied their whole life.

  • i never knew i had a helicopter parent. my mom looks through my phone. only got me a phone to track me. doesn’t allow me to delete apps. i’m only allowed to get a’s and b’s or i get my phone taken away for 2 weeks. doesn’t allow me to go anywhere without her or texting her very half hour. cuts off my phone at 8pm. and had slots to eat and if we don’t eat in these slots we don’t eat. i don’t know how to self regulate. and i don’t know how to cope with anything and be independent due to this

  • Yes definetly it is part of common sense. Overprotection might create excusses parents to give their childern everything which creates a narcist. Narcist are mentaly ill.

  • I have helicopter parents. They don’t let me go anywhere alone, not even for a short walk around the house, but at the same time they complain that I’m always at home. They also say, that I can tell them everything, but if I do they judge me. My parents make decisions for me, that I don’t want and control my life. I don’t have any place where I have at least a little bit privacy (We live in a small flat, I share my room with my brother and when I’m finally alone, they come in every 10 minutes without knocking to see what I’m doing) Strict parents have good intentions, they want their children to be safe and study a lot, but instead they simply raise sneaky, good liars.
    (I know it’s old and sorry for my English, it’s my third language)

  • My parents and my older siblings constantly want to know everything I do, who I hang out with, who I know and what I do on my free time. I can’t have a boyfriend (im seventeen) but when I can have a boyfriend he needs to be from the same country as me, needs to have the same religion, a good family and if my family doesn’t like him I have to break up with him. I can’t wear what I want, I can’t speak how I want, I get judged for almost everything I do.

  • Parents who spank their children are teaching their children to hit. All parents should pledge to never hit, slap or spank their children. Talk to them with respect and with love. Whipping children with paddles, belts, branches or any other device is “child abuse” and you should be arrested. These beatings leave big bruises. See my Facebook page “School Paddling is Child Abuse.” Dallas Morning News reported that beatings of children still go on in rural North Texas schools. 31 states have banned school corporal punishment but 19 including Texas still allow it.

  • I’m a helicopter parent. My daughter doesn’t know it. Because i am uniquely subtle. Sometimes i laugh because she wishes I was…a helicopter parent i mean…Hahahahaha.. I don’t know if anyone understands.

  • And when the parents are on their death bed, they will stare at the ceiling and think “Oh God, what have I done? I raised a child, and not an adult. How will they cope without me?” They will plead with God “Please! Take me back! My children cannot survive after my death! Let me go back and I will teach them as I was suppose to!”

    And, if such wish was granted, those parents would go back to their helicoptering ways. It is in their mindset, it is in their blood, they cannot help it. They are such characters that for them to helicopter it is the same as being an alcoholic spending his children’s savings.

    Some children will go above that and become even more independent than those that were given it, for they also acquired the skills to resist tyranny. Those parents, they will not have to suffer a regret they otherwise would’ve faced. But for the rest, such parents will close their eyes for the final time blissfully unaware of their faults in raising the children.

  • Everything is clear in this video but for one thing. A true parenting, to my mind, is not only in enabling our children ‘strike out on their own’ but in returning to us as friends with whom we will walk in life till the very end. This is what such videos usually fall short of telling. The image of ‘an all-responsible absolutely dependable successful doer’ is being promoted anyway and widely enough. Perhaps, that is why the weak and elderly parents, the weak people in general, are pushed aside and die lonesome in the old people’s homes. What cartoon should be made to promote an image of someone who is not directed at ultimate success at all costs?

  • Now that I’m eighteen i can see the way I’ve been raised has affected me negatively and i am trying hard to break out of it however when you have no clue where to start off it’s even more difficult

  • It depends on the child’s ambition to develop skills to become independent my mother was a helicopter parent she forbidden me to wash on her washing machine but eventually my older sibling helped me learn how to wash.

  • My mom had this potential. She was extremely overprotective of me and I felt like I was imprisoned when I was in high school. I got a job and my senior year, I drew the line. I had a job, I was responsible, I had my own money and I was determined to hang out with my friends. So I did. I had to learn to lie very well though. Strict, overprotective and helicopter parents produce very good liars. When I turned 18, I basically laid down the law on my mom. It was a tough time for all of us at the time because my grandfather (her dad) was sick with leukemia and passed away a year later. My mom was dealing with his illness and going to school to be a nurse, but somehow still found the time to check up on me in college. I had to lay down the deal for her and it was hard on both of us. That said, I’m glad I did. She backed off and though she still crosses the line once in a while now (I’m 49, married with 3 kids, 2 of whom are adults themselves), she knows she has to back off when it’s brought to her attention. It’s hard, you will feel like an asshole, but you MUST get out from under that and your helicopter parent MUST be told and held to their position.

  • First story.

    “Sorry, ma’am but ‘yo’ didn’t get the position ‘your’ son was applying for.”

    Second story.

    Sorry to hear it.

    Third story.

    “a nervous ball of wax.” Weird all the balls of wax I see, seem stable and seem to just ‘roll with things’

    Fourth story.

    ‘Focker’ HA! More then you know, ‘poor guy’ indeed.

    Fifth story.

    “You didn’t answer my calls.” Well mom it was probably becuase I was asleep after work, which tends to happen after work and need it continue to function properly at work, SO FUCK OFF!

    Sixth story.

    “Your wife’s mother told me to pick up your daughter and walk away.” And you listened to someone a thousand miles away? Well you know what, okay. The police will be by shortly to arrest you and you can tell them what you told me and that will be used for a judge to restrict their rights.

    Seriously, this story has so many ‘legal issues’ attached to it. Especially the ‘someone picked up my child from work and no one told me about it.’

    Seventh story.

    “Lying was the best way to get out of anything.” Ma’am… do know what ‘DNA’ is, right? And ‘security cameras’ and ‘eye witnesses that happen to also be cos’ are, right? You killed the guy.

    Eighth story.

    Honestly, breaking up with someone like that may be the best wake up call for people with Helicopter parents.

    Ninth story.

    “Waited outside until the class was in session.” So what? What was going on through that woman’s mindset? He child would have been stolen or something?

    “Mom and dad sold their house and moved where baby is going to collagetwice.” Okay, make a fake ‘acceptance’ letter and ‘move’ to the town where that collage is, then double back and go to the actual collage that allowed you in.

    “The helicopter baby is becoming a helicopter pilot.” And getting further the fuck away from her parents.

    Tenth story.

    I would have continued ‘teaching that woman’ for her sake. I didn’t hear a ‘fired her for incompetence’ or make a simulated architect project but told her it was real. She failed, scold her for her ‘blatant stupidity and how are you going to explain your lower intelligence to your parents?’ The ‘parents’ part would have caused her to cry and as she was crying made an offer to learn.

    Eleventh story.

    Yeah, now I’m thinking some Helicopter parents are ‘corporate spies’ if the offspring won’t keep anything ‘confidential’… that would be a ‘long game’ to get information on a rival company.

    Twelfth story.

    “I’m a doctor” Of……what? Again these parents don’t understand that ‘doctor’ isn’t an ‘occupation’ it’s a ‘title’. Obviously ‘medical’ but he could have been a ‘doctor of art’ or ‘doctor of archeology’ and he would still be a ‘doctor.’

    Thirteenth story.

    “they regard her as a failure.” Well then you need to cut contact or put your foot down more. It sounds like the wife needs some breathing room.

    Fourteenth story.

    The mistake I saw, the ‘cooking and cleaning’ don’t cook and clean, force him to learn by means of starvation as the ‘resenting them’ part sounded like a moody teenager. He was ’57’ and needs to grow up.


    A good friend would do this, “Hey, can I speak to your mom……Hi.” Hangs up, “There, now lets play some damn video games.”

    Sixteenth story.

    “Dose that stop her from guilt tripping me for not seeing her for her birthday? Nope.” Well mom I do feel guilty, that I missed out on another birthday without hearing it will be, your ‘last’ birthday.

    Seventeenth story.

    Good parenting.

    As for the video as whole, what do these paretns think their offspring will do when they’re gone? I mean, they are going to die someday and are going to leave behind a dysfunctional member of society that is of no value to others?

  • As someone who is trying to adult, not gonna lie. It’s hard. And that four step method? That got me through (believe it or not) two years of highschool shop class. More people need that method than anyone else. It helps.

  • My mother always likes to know what I’m doing. 24/7. All the time.
    They also veto clothes that have no reason to be vetoed, as they cover up my skin in the required places and have no offensive symbolism or imagery on them. Most of the time their reasons are just dumb.
    My mom always likes to reprimand me about how I should be happy to live in a well-off household.
    I have depression and symptoms of bipolar disorder. I am afraid to tell them about it since they were so terrible to me when I was going through rough times.
    I am not allowed to have many things. I am not allowed to text friends, and if I am, they have to read them. I have to do everything in secret.
    I want to cry all of the time because of my frustration with them.
    “You can’t wear this, it’ll draw negative social attention.”
    “Lay low and blend in with the crowd.” “So no personality?” “Yes.”
    My mother assumes I like all the things she likes. I do not. I like gothic clothing, but she does not, so obviously I must wear what she wants me to wear and look how she wants me to look.
    She asks questions I cannot answer. She bombards me with questions if I’m not ‘talkative enough’ or ‘absent from the conversation.’
    I cannot dye my hair black simply because my parents believe it will draw ‘negative attention’ and don’t like it. It’s literally black. One step down from brunette.
    I am not allowed to spend MY money on things I like. It must be approved by them.
    I have secure browsers on all of my devices.
    I have found every loophole known to man on my devices. The day they catch me is the day I’ll confront them about their obsessive tendencies and then stand there as I get grounded for being ‘ungrateful.’

  • Idk if this would classify as the american standard of helicopter parenting, but i am from Albania and this subject really touches me deeply. Albania has been a patriarchal society our whole history and helicopter parenting has been the norm for centuries. Some people are old fashioned, fanatic and very very big on honor, to the point that they will commit honor killings. I’ve known countless people being chased by relatives to find out what they’re doing or if they have a secret partner, I’ve witnessed people being beat up for it, girls being abused for not obeying their parents and family members, girls being killed for dating, going out to a party once (this happened in Australia), coming late from their fiancé etc. Just endless examples of not only the parents being horrible, but even relatives especially maternal uncles bc in our culture they are held very highly. Not only will they behave like this, but in some rural areas they will even marry off their daughters, pick their husbands and if the girl chooses to wait to marry they will allude that she is “stuck at the door” expression for she can’t find a husband, she has no value.

  • And it sucks because there is no one to blame, my parents were just a bunch of scarred people trying their best to raise a child yet unsurprisingly they failed and badly.

  • This is why ANTINATALISM IS THE BEST WAY…. Stop having kids, stop being a burden on the planet and STOP the overpopulation and giving birth to little brats that will only go on to trash this planet and become an even bigger scourge on society.

  • Honestly, my parents are both helicopter parents and reasonably worried. I think they are doing that whole back out of the picture thing, just much more slowly with me due to disabilities. I understand this and won’t complainI don’t think I am ready to be on my own. I’m 20. I’m not that old. I have plenty of time to move out and all that jazz, just rn I am in college and it just isn’t the best idea for me to rush to be 100% independent.

  • I’m getting anxiety attack bcs of my dad being helicopter parent.I hate this way to save me..I want to scream as hard as I can and run away from this..I hate this

  • Jesus christ dont parents realise that shutting down ALL of the interactions with the opposing sex will kill them emotionally as an adult and will left them completely unable to have any sense of common things in relationships?

  • I wish my mom would leave me alone!!!l i cant stand her!!!!! She is on my nerves i cant!!! She is the reason why im fucked up. I hate her so much i cant stand her she is the annyoing fly in ur room at night. Just leave me alone let me breath

  • I’m 23, I have a masters degree and got my first job at a major company with a great salary right out the gate all completely through my own hard work. My parents still treat me like a child.

  • Teach. Demonstrate. Let them practice under supervision. Encourage when they do it on their own. Encourage when they have difficulties. Send them out again with love and confidence.

    Everybody needs coaching and guidance. Even Olympic athletes. But ultimately you encourage while they do it

  • I think they also have a hand in the opiod epidemic too
    Every kid I knew with annoying parents got drunk or high even harder than the rest

  • This is what happens when you remove men from children’s lives, and disempower the ones who stay. Pretty much all helicopter parents are women.

  • My dad, ex baby sister and my teacher are so disappointed becuz i have changed to be more independent and socialable they said “you are not cute anymore. always play with your friend, not family, im so disappointed! I like more when you are so spoiled! No body want an independent girls!! Disgusting!” Meanwhile i hangedout with my friend just once amonth. Im so glad now im orphaned.!!

  • It really sucks all my life has been like this I identify so much with most of them is really embarrassing I have to lie constantly I lie about jobs, relationships, about life I can’t take it anymore only a very few people know the truth but is still embarrassing being such a baby that doesn’t know shit about life and can’t do shit on their own the fact that I’m getting older and everyone my age and even younger have moved on forward and mature with their lives and im still stuck is very depressing but also the thought of losing my helicopter mom terrifies me I will be completely alone and vulnerable with noone to protect me or make my decision im going to therapy and the doctors are sick and tired of me and can’t do anything to help im just hoping I will meet someone new to control my life or somewhere to belong where I can be myself the only part of the video I’m glad is that to see im not the only baby loser and that there’s more like me and I’m not completely alone in this world I’m very unhappy i always and still had lived for other people and not for myself and haven’t done shit or anything I want with my life im almost a 30 year old virgin I just feel is too late to change everyone already moved on, I just hope I can find my place and the right people to join in this world someday

  • My mom isn’t a helicopter parent, but it’s so f*ing depressing to see some other kids having to go through shitty parents. I hope the next generation of parents won’t repeat the previous one.

  • That’s why my mom is great. She always said that the worst thing you can do to a kid is make them dependent. I started packing my lunch on my own in third grade. I knew people that still don’t pack their own lunch, and I’m in high school.

  • As someone with a toxic mom albeit not a helicopter mom, why didn’t they just cut off all contact with the parents? It was as easy as breathing for me to do so.

  • I seriously don’t know what I would do if I had parents like any of these described in the video. How do these parents force religious beliefs/rules/ways to live and not let the child decide for themselves what they believe and how they want to live? It’s a parent’s responsibility to give examples of good morals and show their child the correct way to behave in society, how to be a good person inside and outside of the home, and always be proud of them and encourage their interests/talents/academics. But if a child wants to break away from the religion they were raised in and does not believe in it anymore, a parent should NEVER force it upon them. So many of these examples in this video are straight up abuse. I was raised Catholic and my parents had no issue when I was around 16 when I decided I did not want to be Catholic anymore. Of course they were a tiny bit sad because it’s what they believed, but they always wanted me to think/choose for myself…. they are proud of me because I’m able to do that. When parents make religion control their ENTIRE lives and their children’s I just don’t believe it’s good for them. It just saddens me when a child/teen can’t choose what they want to do (whether that’s in school, extracurricular activities, TV/movies to watch, when or who to date, what to wear, etc.) and I really feel bad for them. Of course when children are growing up they need limitations and rules and need to be taught what’s right and wrong, but these are so overboard and controlling it’s ridiculous. All parents should raise children to think/choose for themselves and never follow the crowd. Encouragement, pride, and shared happiness are all things that once children notice their parents are giving it to them their whole lives, they will grow up as great people and will be able to have many paths/options that they can choose for their lives. When children know they will be praised rather then punished for making their own way in life, they usually succeed well. Helicopter parents don’t realize that it’s perfectly fine to make mistakes and go through tough/disappointing experiences. If a child never makes a mistake, fails, or experiences a loss, when they do experience it as an adult it will severely affect them and they won’t know how to cope at all and take responsibility for their actions. Mistakes and failures made as a child/teen help them understand their self-worth, their feelings, how to bounce back from a disappointment/loss, and helps them get to know their strengths and weaknesses… all while making them see the importance of personal responsibility and not clinging to their parents for help for every little thing. If they never make small mistakes when something very serious or tragic happens when they are older it will feel way more severe then if their parents let them experience mistakes earlier in life… and they will not know how to fix the problem and will become depressed/anxious immediately.

  • Is there anything I could do about this i’m a 20 year old female and my parents has taken my freedom I can’t date or go out if I do I go out for two hours I been thinking about getting a therapist or psychologist I just want someone to talk to about this I can’t Do anyhing I sneak out and they don’t know but I have no choice I been depressed they don’t know about this can someone please help:(

  • Helicopter parents:doesn’t let their 26 year old son get a job and get out of the house because it ‘is a threat to national security’

  • I know a woman who was such a helicopter parent that she didn’t even see that her child had off-the-charts ADHD. She said she wanted to be the perfect parent, and in her mind that meant that her child would never have a moment alone. Either she or her husband had to be “interacting” with the kid at all times. Once the kid started going to school, it was clear to everyone that this had been a mistake everyone except mom. Her child has been held back 3 times in his first 4 years of school.

  • It’s true what you said about quality time with kids.Sometimes we spend 2 or 3 hours with them and it turns out that we only had 15 minutes of quality time doing smth useful,like reading or writing.

  • My helicopter parents need to watch this. I can’t even cook a simple meal without them jumping like I’m going to burn the house down

  • Unable to make a decision is a big one because you constantly second guess yourself and your actions and so you just end up not making a choice and then you wait and wait and wait until either the problem goes away, your forced into something, or it goes to shit

  • I am a byproduct of helicopter parents and I can verify everything you said 100%. Thanks for the video, people need to be aware of this issue ☺️

  • My parents are helicopters to the extreme, and I think it’s starting to cause me social problems. A few extreme examples are: When I go to school they even try to hold my hand and walk me across the street and I have to take my hand away and they still try to go with me:/. Also I lost an eye from cancer and now they force me to go to school with the stupidest-looking goggles, no matter how hard I protest, because they think I might accidentally gauge my good eye out somehow. They weren’t like this with my three older siblings and even they can see that it’s pretty bad.

  • All know this has ruined my childhood and busy rebuilding myself from it. All because of my shitty education system and uncaring parents.

  • this was very helpful…i am supposed to take surveys on this topic for school and had no clue on where to start… this really did help me get an idea. tysm

  • Things I’ve been told by my mom and dad:
    “It’s for your own good”
    “We are just trying to keep you safe.”
    “Did I say you could you that?”
    “Don’t talk to strangers online. I don’t care if they ‘trust you’, they could be using a voice changer!”
    “You need to stop hanging out with _”

  • I believe helicopter parenting is a form of child abuse.

    P.S. On a unrelated side note:
    As a aircraft enthusiast, Fokker doesn’t hit me as it does with other english speakers. In Aerospace Engineering its a very respected name, and especially in the Netherlands and Germany.

  • Great video, thanks for the encouragement! I’m 28 weeks pregnant and I have a busy 16 month old boy, I’m trying to work on figuring out how to manage time for self care and just for myself.

  • anything with a white army star and a barrel would send me to the deepest parts of hell and make me somebody of the likes as ted bundy, as you can see instead of making me safe from it i know of one of the most brutal killers and am fascinated by history and war.

  • I’m 24. And have a fucking mother like this! Bruh! When I move out, on everything, I’m going to cut my bitch ass mother off! But if I did that, she would stalk me SMH

  • I was learning how to make eggs and I couldn’t do anything without asking my dad what to do, it’s so simple and I knew what I was doing but I really wanted approval on what I was doing

  • We should just watching what our child do when we are not present around them like on house roof talking with nabhour aunty. And saying now good morning and we should weak up in morning and sleep in good night
    Play with toy with his friends and talking that this toy is going from siwan (my son’s living place) to station to drop my grandmother
    Pls give me his shoes and water bottle
    In this way we assessed our child thing what type of activity or word
    use in his play (or life skills )
    Like my grandmother is old so she can tired what type of reasons use with his private speech or talking with own during play

  • For future parents out there planning to have kids, PLEASE do not be like my helicopter parent mom. Your kids will be too dependent on you and they won’t ever learn how to do things on their own, talking from my own experience. Let your kids explore and make mistakes because they’re opportunities to learn. My parents shielded me from everything bad in the world. As a young child sure that’s nice, but now as a teenager I’m no where near ready for the adult world.

  • My ex had/has a helicopter mom it was terrible… her mother controlled and still does control her life, she forced her to go to college for something she didn’t want to do and didnt want her to get a job either even at the age of 18, even now during this quarantine stuff shes back in state from college and turns 19 this year still has to be home at certain time… has her own car but her mother keeps the keys and she has to ask to leave the house. While we where together I would try to I guess corrupt there daughter to live her life the way she wants it.. not by your parents. Long story short, shes to far into be controlled by her mother that theres no coming back from it. I tried my best and thought she would stand up against her mother but now her life depends on her basically, roof over her head, gave her her first car, never had a job, has everything handed to her literally. Me being the complete opposite though is a reason the relationship didnt really work out. I know what I want in life and chose the navy, buying my first car, im used to being independent. Buying everything with my money I earned from working. And got a bright future planned

  • As for as I know that you are new youtober, basically I from India I saw your videos more than two, I learned a lots of new things with those videos thanks for making this videos.

  • My mom is very controlling and I would say she can be a bit of a helicopter parent. I recently had an allergic reaction to either my soap or my laundry detergent (found out it was the detergent) that I first thought was bedbugs (I’m starting to think slumlord DIDN’T call the exterminator like he said he would, because I never told him to cancel the appointment). I had a pimply rash covering nearly 75% of my bodyarms, legs, stomach, chest, neck, face, back, everywhere. A mental health worker who is also a paramedic and has seen severe bedbug infestations said it wasn’t bedbugs and took me to the ER for an actual doctor’s opinion and advice. I saw my mom once throughout this and it was when I thought it was bedbugs, so when I saw her again and told her how my mental health worker said it wasn’t bedbugs and took me to the ER, she got a little snooty about not having been told. I wanted to say that she never asked me about what I thought was a bedbug problem after I told her about, so why would I keep her updated? I didn’t get into an accident and that’s why I went to the ER, there was no massive emergency she needed to know about, so why should i tell her? I didn’t say this though, because then she would be up my @$$ about everything. Like, seriously, I am a 24 year old woman who lives on her own, pays her own rent with her own paycheck from her own job. Unless it’s a major emergency, I don’t need to say anything. The only reason we went to the ER was because I only had 4 hours with her and that was the best we could do without an appointment. She also likes to enter my apartment and “clean.” There is no mess, just a cluttered table and dresser tops and things not organized the way SHE wants it to be. Again: MY apartment that is paid for with MY money from MY job, she has no right to do this but says she does because otherwise slumlord will kick me out. She doesn’t understand that slumlord ALSO has rules he has to follow. One being that he can’t tell me how to organize my things so long as there is no health/safety/fire hazard posed in the way I have it. I keep the heaters as cleared as possible and nothing is in front of them in a way that can pose a fire hazard. There is a clear pathway from the living room into my bedroom, kitchen, and bathroom (MORE than a path, but there has to be at least enough room for a gurnee in case medicine assistance is needed.) So, if he were to evict me for how my apartment it organized, it would be an illegal eviction that I could take him to court over. He doesn’t want that. My mom doesn’t understand and doesn’t WANT TO understand that he can’t do whatever he wants just because he’s the landlord. If she came to understand this, then she would lose whatever “power” she thinks she has. I have hidden the spare I have and have to my grandpa (her father) that he IS NOT to allow anyone into my apartment without first asking me, REGARDLESS of who it may be. I still think she was the one who came into my apartment while I was at the dentist and threw away one of my crafts and a box of craft things I had just because they may have, to her, “looked like garbage.” Unsure about how to go about confronting her because she swears that it wasn’t her.

  • Helicopter parenting breeds resentment too, in a way you grieve what you never had, for example not being allowed outside to play, making friends was impossible as an introvert plus social anxiety, so I resorted to books,music and tv. I have and older sibling 10+yrs so not much in common since he’s a guy. Its crude but in a sense I felt like a dog that isn’t socialized so you’re wary of strangers because it’s all you’ve ever known. So please let your kids have freedom, but don’t neglect them. Give them privacy, don’t pry or nitpick everything about them it really fucks with their self esteem. Sorry to rant but it’s something I had to get off my chest.

  • This parenting is horrible, you can’t put a blindfold over your kids eyes and expect them to be perfect after you take it off, they haven’t even SEEN the world yet because you blocked it off, kids need to know how disgusting and horrible this world is and how it can punch you down and kick you on the ground, all they know is “where is my parents to do this, I need help”

  • Helicopter parenting: A style of child rearing in which an overprotective mother or father discourages a child’s independence by being too involved in the child’s life: In typical helicopter parenting, a mother or father swoops in at any sign of challenge or discomfort.

  • I’m the son of a heli mother and not so present father.

    I have no idea how bank accounts and credit works, as long as i’m under her roof i owe her most of my salary, she still treats me, a 23 year old, like if i was 13.

    If she needs me to stay home for some reason, i have to and there’s no choice, otherwise she “threatens” me to send me off to my father’s house.

    I’m learning most of life with my girlfriend, many stuff that i was supposed to learn at a young age i had to learn now, which is very embarassing.

    Lying was also a way of getting out of situations here, same as screaming at you when you’re trying to learn (my father specially), many bad habits and fears to lose.

    Pisses me off when she tells me how she pays food, shelter, electricity, etc.

    I’m not a household pet, i’m your son, if you need to throw a trantum on how you pay stuff for me when i’m trying to get under your roof, maybe you should’ve thought better on having me as a son.

    That kind of treatment had a finger in many of problems that i have today.

  • 4:23 I’m sorry if you just pick my child up and start walking away I wouldn’t even bother chasing them down.

    I’d just shoot them and sell their dead body to a necrophiliac.

  • i watched this because i never knew if my parents (actually moreso my mom) was helicoptering or simply overbearing…but seeing all these stories made me feel extremely lucky she never went to the lengths that some of these parents have

  • My dad was on the verge of being a helicopter parent but had to shut that down real quick. He would want me to cook my food his way and if not just start yelling at me and I dont take being yelled at for stupid shit kindly and will gladly on the spot retaliate against you no matter what the outcome would be. he would also try and gain control of every situation even though I’m fully capable of completing it. I’m currently 20 in the navy and have been working for everything I have like I been doing my whole life. As for now my dad learned the past 7 years(since I lived with my brother and sister with my grandparents for 13 years) what to say how to say and what to do and not to do when it comes to me. We have a decent relationship but a few hiccups here and there.

  • My mother doesn’t call me crazy but it still gives me fear to even hear my alarm (ringtone doesn’t even sound the same) I hope that sir finds a way to get around the calls and text everywhere

  • Every day of my life I had instruction, direction, and no privacy. The instant I was eighteen, all of my structure was cut. I’m 23 now, adjusting decently. My mom got it in her head that I couldn’t go buy a car by myself, so I give her money and she pays my car payment and insurance, the cost of insurance dropped, and she continued to take my money for it. I’m tempted to give her the keys, but I like the car.
    She always had something negative to say about the boys I dated until I dated a girl, then she’d beg me to take back my exes that she just complained about a year or two prior

  • I had all of this..minus any hint of love or validation..she trotted me in front of people when she wanted to be seen as a great “mom”…if I had stayed instead of leaving to live with my Dad..this would have been my life to a tee.

  • Everything those parents told others to do was illegal, and even if not these adults should had cut all contacts, and call cops everytime the parents tried something, assuming you could.

  • I grew up on the cusp of the internet age. Computers were around, but my parents never bought one. I had been using in school, and I bought one when I went to college, but I didn’t grow up with one in the house. My parents would say, “Go out side and play.” That’s what I did. When I was young, I stayed around the house. As teen, I hung with my friends. Children died all the time when I was a kid. It was horrible, but it was life. Every season, you knew one, or two people who died. We never thought about, it was just life. It was mostly boys who died. There was a tree everyone liked to climb. There were small cut off trees, under the big tree. One day, a kid I knew, fell out of the tree, and was impalled on a cut off tree. We went to see if there was any blood. Nope, it rained. We were pissed. You got hit by cars, or drown while swiming. It was just a part of life. Snow was deadly. One kid was missing, and everyone looked for him, and everyone thought he was napped. The family dog got lose, and ran around the porch, and started digging in the snow. There was a set of feet sticking out of the deep snow. He just fell head first in the snow, and died. Snow seemed the worst. We were walking to school, and the snow plow came. We stepped back, when it went by. As we walked, the girl said, “Where’s Billy.” We ran back, and found him buried by the plow. He was okay, after we got him out. His sister slapped him around, for making her late for school. I never did this, but I had friends, that would put there little siblings out on the street. Then when a pedo came to grab them, they would attack the the pedo. I remember I was throwing a ball to my friend at the ball field. No game, just hanging out. This drunk came, and told us leave. We left, but we said something sarcastic. The guy attack us. The guy was actually choking me, so I couldn’t breath. My friend broke his leg with the bat, then he beat the drunk senseless. I never told my parents, because I would have gotten in trouble. That was life, pre internet. People call teenagers “Snowflakes”. I say F this morons. No one should just leave children to run around, without being cared for. That’s crazy.

  • I had copter parents to a point, but I fortunately started fighting for my independence early on. The only way to deal with it is to do what you want anyway and call their bluff. They will cry, they will scream, they will threaten, but in my case whatever they thought they could do was in no way worse than what they were already doing. They’ve chilled out as they’ve aged, but they are in no way a central part of my life. Best of luck to anyone still in that situation.

  • My father mostly ignored me unless I did something he dissaproved off. Then I got his full “attention” of course.
    My father wasn’t a helicopter parent but rather a Stuka (infamous german WW2 dive bomber)

  • My exes mom is a narcissistic helicopter parent in the worst form. She abandoned 2 of her other kids (12 & 19). They live with her but she doesn’t give a fuck about them & doesn’t make any effort to care for them properly. But she ruined her 23yr old son, who I dated for 6 years. We used to (he still does) live 2 doors down from her. He can’t do anything without her. He can’t leave the house, he can’t make phonecalls, can’t make decisions, cant order his own food or even decide what to eat on his own, he has severe anxiety. She wouldn’t let him do anything without her help. She convinced my ex to break up with me just days after I pressed charges against my rapist & encouraged him to find “something better”. She called me lazy, disgusting, a pig, abusive, psychotic etc. (Even though I spent 4 entire months straight taking care of my dog after 2 traumatic surgeries, while he sat on his ass and played video games 18hrs a day). She physically assaulted me the day I had a miscarriage and left me battered & bruised.

    She had complete control over MY life bc we met when I was 14. Eventually she had full control over my phone plan & cancelled it when my ex broke up with me bc I was crying. She initially ripped it from my hands until I had to call the cops. I needed my phone & she knew I had an active investigation with an aggressive abuser. Her words were that it’s not her problem & she doesn’t care.
    Also, I was a tenant in that place, I paid my own rent & she grabbed me by my arm and said I could go to her parents house in the middle of nowhere (with no food, clean drinking water, money, or transporation) or I could “get the fuck out and sleep outside”
    She took our entire freezer & left me with no space for food for myself. She would take OUR car every day (even though my ex bought her her own car) and she made me miss hundreds of appointments. She would criticize me for my diet even though I have crohns and seriously can’t eat much without getting sick.

    Any time I’d have a PTSD episode, he would call her to “deal with me”. By that I mean she would nag me for being a shit girlfriend, shit person & made me feel awful for things out of my control.

    Ultimately, she refused to let him be there for the miscarriage of his baby, and convinced him he’s not allowed to support me for the trial surrounding my rape bc otherwise she’ll kill herself. Oh, and she told her 12y/o on multiple occasions since the breakup that she’s going to leave or kill herself & that it’d be my fault she did it.

    In short, I hate her, she’s a horrible mother, woman and human. My ex is an amazing guy who made me feel like I could do anything, but now refuses to be with me & have anything to do w/ me bc he’s worried his mom will kill herself.

  • K so as a teenager with anxiety I find it really comforting to see when my mom will pick me up from extracurriculars. Note I can’t drive yet

  • Oof…. A year ago I was getting a job, a really good one. I just had to turn in some papers they were waiting for since it was a different country. I went there with my mother because she was my ride. Don’t really know why I let her go in with me, but she went with me. I was talking to the person hiring me and the hotel director. My mother kept answering for me, and interrupting me constantly. I felt so humiliated. I was 26 at that time. My mother always had her way of treating me like a 5 year old when she felt the need to control something or someone.
    After I went nuts on her to never do that again, she could’ve ruined my opportunity, she apologized and never did. Now I’m dealing with my boyfriend, a 30 year old and his mother who still does the suitcase for him. And dealing with our newborn ��She has blocked me and doesn’t speak to me anymore because after yelling at me I told her to back the fuck off (not in that language though) and let her son be an adult, that he has to learn there are consequences to his actions and mommy and daddy are not always going to be there, my relationship is with him, I live with him and not her, and this is OUR daughter of which her son has to take care of, he is 30 fucking years old. So.. I don’t regret anything I said. If she wants to act this childish, so be it. I’m not going to let her have it. I already have to raise her son who has the emotional maturity of a 5 year old and who has huge trouble managing stress, managing responsibilities and taking decisions. I am living with TWO BABIES. I don’t need any more. I don’t ever need to hear “you’ll be a mother one day and you’ll know”. No. I already know many many mothers who have common sense and learned the difference between love and selfish love. Smothering your child and not teaching him to live on his own because you feel the need to fill a void by doing everything for him, is not right.

  • This right here gave me a reality check I might have grown up with a helicopter mom and this video helped me realize that all of the effects that these people had I’m realizing right now that I have wow…

  • I can’t drive. I’m almost 17.
    I’m not allowed to open my front door without first getting permission.
    No T rated games. Again, I’m almost 17. Seven teen
    Not allowed to have my school-given Chromebook in my room. Even though 90% of the Internet is blocked on it.
    I can’t go out to see friends unless I get permission an entire month in advance. Most people don’t even know their schedules that far in advance.
    Privacy? Is that a myth?
    Wearing clothing that shows any minuscule bit of skin? Are you kidding?

    Essentially… I can’t do shit

  • Low-key reminds me of my parents. They were nowhere near as bat shit as these people but they wouldn’t allow me to have friends to any degree if they didn’t know their parents. And now they wonder why I have a hard time making friends or don’t have any at the age of 25.

  • That last poster knows what she is talking about. I cringe every time I her a parent making every minute a teaching moment. These are usually the same parents who can’t let goI am wondering if the helicopter parents are behaving that way because, 1..they were brought up the same way and don’t see the problems. 2. They were raised without anyone caring about them did not want to make that same mistake, 3. The parent. Mother, was raised by parents who expected that she grow up get married and have babies, and do nothing else. The empty nest syndrome is responded by the parent not cutting the apron strings and letting the kids make their own decisions and letting them fail. You learn responsibility and social skills by failing.

  • My friend had a helicopter mom and no dad. He was a real good guy, fun and incredibly smart. But because of her he singlehandedly turned almost a whole school against him, he was completely manipulated and would be violent without need, rude at random, acted like the whole world was out to spite him save for his few close friends like me, and assumed everyone was his enemy if they so much as mentioned his name. By the time we finished winter sports in school, his mom made him drop all contact with everyone save for a few he rebelled against your talk to. Not sure how he’s doing today. Hope he’s doing alright. He has a good head on his shoulders aside from the social issues

  • 9:34. I’m proud of the doctor who just doesn’t care. I was twice his age before realizing that I don’t care. The scary thing is that somebody has an appointment with me tomorrow.

  • As a migrant single parent with no relatives close by done everything I could do by meself for my children without knowing it is a such a bad parenting. Made their lunches and packed and dropped them at school until they finished year 12. Now I do understand why they are still depending on me. They are working part time and studying full time now. But, still they are not ready to make them selves. Feel guilty now. I protected them as I was working full time take caring them full time and I did not want any other problems.

  • I have helicopter mum and my younger brother is austistic. she would do all his homework and even asked my dad and myself help to complete his homeworks. When he was in HS, he still couldnot do his own homework because he doesn’t understand what is the question asking. Mum would asked me and sometimes my dad to help my brother do his hw. And this year when he supposed to enter university, he still cannot decide his major without asking his friend (who applying at best univ at my country and out of town) so he could applying there too. And of course my mum will say no

  • I get so pissed my dad is helicoptering me now that I’m 35 when he wasn’t even around as a kid when he divorced my mum and went overseas with another lady and her child who he tries to make a our family!! His contact is totally unwanted by me and it just amazes me why he is trying to helicopter at this point in time. It’s like shit if I’m 35 and grew up without you what the hell is the purpose of all this contact now?? Im glad he wasn’t around if this is the way he is. Hed only contact me every 6 months at times before, what the hell is all this now?? I don’t need his concern.

  • It’s awesome the west takes these problems seriously while here in the middle east they praise the fuck out of parents, no matter what they do.

  • I was raised by a single helicopter mom. Absolute madwoman. She adopted me when I was 7, and controlled every single aspect of my life until I was 17 and I managed to break away. Since I was lucky enough to be in therapy my whole life, I knew it wasn’t normal, and I knew it wasn’t ok, but there was nothing I could do about it. Now I have very intense control issues. Yes, I hate to admit it but I’m a control freak. I do not and will not control others but I have to be in complete control if I’m to involve myself in just about anything. I guess I just felt helpless for so long I refuse to put myself in a situation that would even remote resemble my last. I know it’s not the healthiest thing and my therapist and I are working on it but it’s something so engrained in me… anyway that’s how it affected me personally, I do suffer from anxiety but I’d been with my mother for almost years when I began dealing with it so doubt it was due to the helicoptering bc I’d dealt with that from day one.

  • I don’t think it’s helicopter parenting. I think it’s children being parentified by immature, needy or reckless parents that is causing the problem. Then they don’t have energy for themselves.

  • We got parents who are way too neglectful and then we have parents this over the top protective. The world couldn’t be more balanced, can it?

  • I’ve seen soooo many times how extremely strict parents screw up their kids because as soon as they get a little freedom, they rebel like crazy. But I really feel sad for the girl and others like her who are raised in conservative Christian “purity” culture who are not allowed to date and have to marry whoever their fathers say they can. How are you supposed to develop a healthy relationship or even know what one is if you’re not allowed to date?

  • My parents were helicopter parents who both had helicopter parents themselves. Their relationship has always been a disaster and my dad was really abusive to my mom, me and my brother, but she never divorced him because her mom wanted them to stay together. They were both really controlling all my childhood, especially my dad, who consistently criticized me for not doing well enough in school, how I dressed, how I acted and a lot of other things. I used to think he hated me because of how miserably he treated me, (used to hit me when I was a kid, yell at me and basically toss me around if I ever tried to confront him or state any kind of opinion). My parents had never made a life for themselves and were always mad indecisive and we’d always had serious financial issues, most of my childhood was spent moving to different countries for about 5 years at a time, and 5 of those years I spent miserably cooped up with the rest of my family in a small bedroom in my grandparents’ house, because my parents were both unemployed and unable to decide how to move forward. They were also constantly fighting. It was literal hell on earth.
    Fast forward a couple of years, I’m 19, going to a pretty good uni (thankfully) and trying to build a life for parents have their own apartment now but still have massive financial problemsmy dad doesn’t want to get a job and acts like the while world owes him something (I’m pretty sure he’s a narcissist) and blames me, my brother and my mom for “ruining his life”, while my mom works her ass off in manual labour.
    I’m still not sure how to feel. I want to feel sorry for them but at the same time I absolutely resent them for always dragging me through their own messalthough I do feel terrible for my mom, who’s had it really rough, and honestly has been the only person in my family who’s ever supported me in any way.
    So moral of the story, don’t have kids unless you’ve figured out your own life, and are able to provide a safe, stable and happy environment for them, otherwise all you’ll be doing is making someone else’s life as bad, if not worse than yours has been.
    To anyone who has ever been through something similar, please never give upI see you, and you have all my love and support.

  • These parents are annoying. Especially the ones who continue it kn to their grandchildren. Sorry but you’ll only get as much power with MY kids as I allow you to if you arent their mother.

  • This is one of the reasons I can’t be a mom. I know I would be a helicopter mom. I joke about it with my bf and he laughs and agrees, but eh I feel bad about it, I just can’t do that to a kid.
    Also shit I am kinda the second story, the only time I feel so confident is playing mtg.

  • Seriously, no kid asked to have you as a parent let alone being born.

    And if you are going to act like an overprotective nutjob and deny your kid a childhood like the other kids from the block then they will mourn that you took their chance away to be happy and develop healthy friendships with others. You are the type of parents CPS should go after.

  • Many helicopter moms are narcissistic. They feed off of control and are essentially grooming you to be their caretaker. They will ruin relationships, destroy your confidence and will siphon off your money until you become broke.

  • My parents on varying levels were helicopter parents. My mom gave me a bit more freedom as a teen but she passed and my dad had to finish raising me. He still fights with me about my clothing, I’ve always been low key alternative and my dad complains and tells me how bad my clothing looks. He says things like ” I wish your mother was here”…why? She would respect me and leave me be.

    I had to defensively lie and hide things from my dad. He doesn’t deal well with change or tragedy. Hell I’ve gotten piercings and hidden both them and my stretched ears in plain sight.

  • The lying is so annoying!!! My husband’s mom wasn’t an extreme helicopter parent. Just a few issues of letting go when they became adults. Mostly her feelings would get hurt and she would just throw a quiet temper tantrum. So when I was dating my husband, he would do the stupid lying about small stuff. It took several years to get him out of that. ����

  • Damn good thing my mom was absent most of my life or else I’d have a crippling drug problem, ’cause that’s how my siblings from her turned out

  • This was my mom’s process when teaching me how to wash and fold my own clothes at 8yrs old. I remember going to highschool with people who didn’t know how to work a washing machine cause their mom always did their clothes for them. So sad.

  • Adult kids of helicopter parents are still too scared and weak to speak up to their parents to back off. My husband doesn’t seem to want to stand up to his mom (and neither does his brother). It’s frustrating since I would like to tell my mother in law a thing or two about her charater and behaviour. But sadly I suffer in silence since my hubby, brother-in-law and sister-in-law are too scared to put the mom in her place. If I do it I look like the bad guy. They are in their 30s the cord was cut a long time ago. And I see my sister-in-law becoming just like our MIL. She and my BIL just had a baby dear lord sweet baby Jesus help that kid.

  • The family of the girl with dependent personality disorder sounds almost exactly like mine, only instead of helicoptering me, they neglected me while acting as if they weren’t. My dad and grandad would often gaslight me by promising to include me in things they were teaching my younger brother (I’m a woman). Things like how to work on a car, how to start a savings account, how to invest, yknow, really important life skills. I’d adamantly and as excitedly as my introverted abused ass could muster insist that I was interested and was willing to learn. I was never included and my dad did it on purpose. He’d take my brother to work on the car without telling me. He started a savings account for him and would invest small amounts of money into it, but refused to for me. Him and my grandad helped my brother pay for his first vehicle, while I had to work my ass off to buy mine by myself. The excuse my dad gave for not including me? “You aren’t showing any interest.”

    My brother still lives at home, but has a better grasp of several skills that I don’t have. Meanwhile I learned early on that I had to take care of myself, but ended up with a trail of codependent, abusive relationships as an adult due to the abuse piled on to the neglect.

    I cut most of my family off and went low-contact with my mom two years ago. I still talk to my siblings occasionally, but everyone from the previous two generations can stay in their little bubble of toxicity.

  • I have a friend named Jack who had an extremely overprotective, strict, and religious mom. When he moved out he got a tattoo, piercings, started drinking and smoking weed, became a big slut and even became a male stripper for a few years. Good job, mom.

  • I just keep yelling “what the fuck” as I’m watching this. I went through some of the same exact shit with my parents growing up. I’m just glad I finally managed to get away from them for good. I’m expected to have my own place by the end of next month, and thankfully, it’s in a town my parents refuse to go near, because it’s “ghetto and full of black people”. What’s funny though is that those “black people” are way more accepting and compassionate towards me, as opposed to my racist white boomer parents

  • Not an adult yet but going anywhere without an adult or just a friend makes me anxious, even if it’s just something like being in the thestre and standing up to go to the bathroom, I’m not really too enthusiastic about adulthood because of stuff like this.

  • OK on that random that just pick up the baby. Cops would have been called so fast and I would have pressed charges on everyone the max. Wife’s parents included for conspiracy to kidnapping.

  • My mom is a helicopter parent. She thinks she kept me safe from evil, but she always (and continues to make) excuses for the evil within my own family, especially my father..

  • Ma’am my son is 6years old and he is studying in std 1 he does not do anything in the class even he does not write anything in the exams also but he able to write everything he can write he knows everything but the thing is that he don’t want to write even in the home also he does not want to read and write…… What should I do ma’am please give me a suggestion

  • it’s crazy how most of these ppl know more ab themselves than i do myself lol like they can specifically list all of their problems in life and why they are there but they can’t fix them lol

  • 25 and grew up with helicopter parents, only recently after seeing a therapist about whats happening in my life right now did i come to find out that all of my lifes problems all stem from the way my mother raised me… im on the right track now.

  • My mom can be helicoptery at times. I had a secret girlfriend for 7 months because my mom tended to hate every girlfriend I had. I remember my bank account was connected to hers and she could go in and look at my shit whenever she wanted. She used to get mad at me for buying the occasional video game after getting my pay cheque. Even now she’s constantly nagging at me. I’m damn near 26 and have been moved out for 4 years.

  • This is my mom. She lets my sisters be who are older and I’m 25 and she still babys me on things like this. Sometimes i always assume she learns from her whiny Abigail Folger looking “sis” of hers aka her girlfriend because she is the same way. She’ll complain if I’m swearing on FB and she says it is bad. I’m an adult so how would she know what is good and what is bad? I’ll swear if i like.

  • 2:15 call me racist, but i think that was 100% asian mom. “what will people say”, grueling training and daughter fulfilling MOM’S dream is so asian.

  • i give my daughter as much i can afford but still she tries to take others sweets or toys..wen i take her to market she cont. demands this n that…i m very much worried…please suggest.

  • America does not lock up child predators. NEVER HAVE them alone in a populated Area. Also never have AN UNDER 12 cooking on a stove bur will ruin a child’s life completely. Check out a pediatric brain unit and you’ll see what I mean. It’s a fine line but it’s our responsibility to make sure they reach adulthood with a fully intact body, and a sharp mind.

  • Tbh, if your SO’s parents suck, get out of that relationship because they’ll suck the life out of your marriage. It sucks but it will never work if your in-laws are crazy.

  • I’ve written a saying for helicopter parents, and it’s called ‘Just because you love someone, doesn’t mean they can’t die’, the ‘die’ part is meaning, things are going to go wrong anyway.

  • Some parents need to be forced to march through the Mojave desert, and then at the end lashed to a cross till some deranged mailman either cuts them down or blows their heads off.

  • Yes.
    Also, Baby boomers are actually the original ‘millennials’. They were the first generation to be spoiled and emotionally stunted. Before baby boomers, there was no such thing as the teenage demographic. Ever since then, each successive generation seems to be getting worse and worse

  • I am very thankful for the way that my parents taught me. They don’t bullshit me and congratulate me when I actually did something good and they they let me do what I need to do and let me figure it out when I need to.

  • Overprotective parents are lazy incompetent parents but also mentally abusive because they only care about shushing their paranoid thought and won’t bat their eye at the depression they inflict other their children. Mothers are the worst. I hardly see a cool mom who worries more about letting them live their childhood to the fullest than give into stupid fears. I spoke to a few but they are like Diamonds.

  • My parents are strict as well. Not in the sense of all those shown on reddit. This is mine

    Whenever I’m on the phone with my boyfriend they’re always like “Who are you talking to?”. Literally there’s one person who calls me, take a freaking guess. My Dad is worse, he’ll ask and then he’ll tell me to hang up. (I never see him, he’s a volunteer Firefighter and works two jobs) When I met him I didn’t understand what it meant to be a girlfriend, I’ve messed up a few times (And by that I mean gone back on my promises and I once gave my phone number to some dude on the bus, trust me when I say I didn’t understand what was going on when I did that) I literally owe him my life. If I’m out with friends, I have to keep my mom updated on: what I’m doing, who I’m with, who will drive me home, and what time I’ll be back. Its almost like she comes with me but not exactly. I feel bad for those who actually do get followed. I’m very innocent, there were a lot of sexual things I never understood and when I’d ask my Dad he would say “I doubt you actually don’t know what that is”. I literally don’t know how to respond to this.
    yeah I love my parents but I wish they’d back off.
    It’s not fun trying to drive, every error I make my dad yells at me. My mom is better at trying but she’s too afraid of me behind the wheel. What’s worse is I zone out as I’m starting to hit something.

    For me to see my boyfriend I have to be alone, and with his schedule and me in college it almost never happens…. The few times I do see him its while he’s working at one of his jobs….

    It sucks… all I wanna be is with him…
    I’m saving up for an apartment or something, I don’t have a job yet but I’m going to get one soon. Even with my stomach problems.

  • 4:00 this is child abuse. this is a very valid reason to call CPS. so why the fuck doesn’t anyone care for someone being tortured and enslaved?

  • My friend tells me about her over bearing mother all the time here’s son thing she’s told me this gurls mom forces her to do a tone of activity’s such as swimming and national junior honors society if she has a c she’s a failure in her mothers eyes bis on a bad road b she’s on thin ice a decent her mom also compares her to our other friend cause this other friend is a star student so yeah you could my friends mom is kind of like her insane

  • Wow. So, I have arrested development but that has to do with the fact I had crippling disability for 5 years in my mid twenties and as soon as I got better I enrolled straight back into college so I could finish what I started. I’m almost 30 and live at home because of that (also in the most expensive state where owning a home is a pipe dream and only for millionaires). But I’m moving out next year to be with my fiance. I’ll be able to finally afford it and work enough. Its strained my relationship with my mom and there have been moments I think she forgets I’m not a child and have done everything regarding school (getting scholarships and straight As and getting the right classes) and employment and my relationship, entirely myself without her assistance. But…damn. this video makes me appreciate shes not that bad. Even though I was disabled she tried to give me as much autonomy as possible

  • Having helicopter parents is not a good thing as in my case. I have trouble being a young adult. I wish my parents raised me to become more independent and resourceful enough to tackle the daily challenges of life. They are overly controlling to the point that they are becoming intrusive to my personal space, tastes and preferences. It also hurts that I am a discreet or closeted gay man as both especially my father is an extreme homophobe and misogynist. ��

  • I went to the obgyn the other day for my pregnancy and my mom had to come and answered every question before I even got a chance because I have severe social anxiety how am I supposed to learn to deal with it if she speaks over me

  • My sister hovers over her kids and if I bring up talking to her about helicopter parenting then I am the horrible person. But my sister took her helicopter parenting ways from our own parents. So my parents see nothing wrong with helicoptering your kids.

  • I need some help with my helicopter parents. Don’t care about much else, I just need to figure out how to get them to stop limiting my screen time to 1 hour. I’m trying to get them to lift it entirely, but it won’t work. BTW im 14 and the only shooter game I can play is Destiny 2, so ontop of this, can any of you destiny 2 fans tell me the fastest way to get more glimmer.

  • When I take my 3 year old to the park I tend to watch his every move and follow him around, not because I’m scared of him getting hurt but because I’m scared of someone kidnapping him:( because there is soooooooo many bad people out there who often go to these places to take kids:( so I have that fear

  • Someone tell me why I’m like these people but don’t have helicopter parents. Why do I have the same issues but have super laid-back parents???

  • So I think I might have helicopter parents but I’m not sure. My parents make me ask them before I can download an app (they have the Apple ID password) and then spend weeks or even months before getting back to me. My dad has screen time turned on for every app (except for messages and phone calls) besides YouTube and has it on the ENTIRE day. His reason? I’m ‘on my phone too much’. Both he and my mom have the password for my email account. My dad once made me go outside for 10+ minutes in 30 degree weather without a coat because I was having trouble focusing on a test. My mother excused it by saying he was having a bad day. Yet, when I’m generally pissed off they get mad and tell me it isn’t an excuse. My mom’s the okay parent but my biological dad (her husband) is pretty much a nightmare. He has a terrible temper. Once when I was feeling insanely depressed and collapsed on the floor, hyperventilating and crying he told me to ‘stop otherwise I’d faint’. Didn’t even ask me if I was okay. The only thing I can talk to him about without me or him getting mad or annoyed is our cat. (She’s fabulous but that’s for another time). My mom actually somewhat cares. When I told her I felt terrible when my half-sister’s boyfriend’s mum called me her “sister” she told me I ‘shouldn’t get emotion over words’. I’m currently hugely questioning my gender so thanks mum. Unfortunately I can’t do anything because I’m homeschooled and a minor. Sorry for the rant.:)

  • Your Daily Joke:

    A refinery is under fire. Units of the local fire service helplessly watch the blazing flames and explosions. A few moments later, a vehicle from the volunteer fire department appears. The old truck passes the local fire service and rams the fence straight into the blaze. Volunteers emerge from the vehicle and put out the fire. A few weeks later, the Governor congratulates the brave volunteers and asks them if he could help them in any way. One of the men replies:

    The brakes on our truck do not work. We could use an overhaul.