15 Methods to Know If Someone Is Gaslighting You

 

10 Gaslighting Signs in an Abusive Relationship

Video taken from the channel: Psych2Go


 

15 Signs of Gaslighting

Video taken from the channel: Jess Stanley


 

What is Gaslighting? 9 Signs This Type of Manipulation is Happening to You!

Video taken from the channel: Julia Kristina Counselling


 

THIS is Gaslighting!

Video taken from the channel: Kati Morton


 

How to Spot the Hidden Signs Someone Is Gaslighting

Video taken from the channel: MedCircle


 

What Is GASLIGHTING And How To Deal With It

Video taken from the channel: BRAINY DOSE


 

How to deal with gaslighting | Ariel Leve

Video taken from the channel: TED Archive


15 Ways to Tell If Someone Is Gaslighting You. Pin Flip Email Search. Search Clear GO. More in Bullying Impact Prevention and Coping Featured Tools. Ovulation Calculator When someone is gaslighting you, you often second-guess yourself, your memories and your perceptions.

After communicating with the person gaslighting you, you are left. You feel crushed and smothered. You’re constantly second-guessing yourself; your feelings, your perceptions, your memories, and a small, suffocated part inside of you wonders whether you are actually going crazy. You feel neurotic, you feel hyper-sensitiveand you feel an overwhelming sense of alienation. It may also help to identify the techniques used in gaslighting — in subverting another person’s sense of self in this way.

Let’s say the person you’re concerned about is your romantic. Some common phrases you might hear from your gaslighter are: You’re so sensitive! You know that’s just because you are so insecure. Stop acting crazy. Or: You sound crazy, you know that, don’t you?

You are just paranoid. You just love trying to throw me off track. I.

A gaslighter can discard you in other ways by telling you that you’re not important, having an affair, ignoring you, withholding, coming and going, or keeping you in limbo about the future of your relationship. Examples of gaslighting abuse in the discarding stage: “You’re pathetic. I deserve someone better.”. Write down whatever you can think of. You must be able to confirm that you’re being gaslighted before you can move on with your life.

Pay attention to the signs of being gaslighted, like feeling confused, belittled, “crazy” or manipulated. Take a. ‘Gaslighting’ is when someone leads you to question your own reality. This dangerous type of manipulation happens in personal relationships, professional relationships, and by public figures. If you, or a loved one, are surrounded by someone who is manipulative in relationships, you’ll need to know all about ways to respond to gaslighting tactics. Because gaslighting can be slight, simple, or uneasy to detect, we’ve rounded up some important information for you to know about gaslighting and give you tools to respond to gaslighting.

Gaslighting is unfortunately a very common phenomenon, and one that is very cruel. If you are not familiar with it, it is essentially a form of psychological manipulation, in which a person. In my first blog about gaslighting, I talked about the “good news” about gaslighting—that is, that once you identify this destructive pattern in your relationship, you can change it.

List of related literature:

The rest is sleepwalking and gaslighting, smoke and mirrors.

“Women's Lives, Men's Laws” by Catharine A. MacKinnon
from Women’s Lives, Men’s Laws
by Catharine A. MacKinnon
Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 2007

An interesting characteristic about the description of each deceptive “yes” or “no” is how often an accompanying body language symptom completes the deceptive cluster.

“Principles of Kinesic Interview and Interrogation” by Stan B. Walters
from Principles of Kinesic Interview and Interrogation
by Stan B. Walters
Taylor & Francis, 2002

One particularly sinister form of control they use is known as “gaslighting.”

“Single Men Are Like Waffles—Single Women Are Like Spaghetti: Friendship, Romance, and Relationships That Work” by Bill Farrel, Pam Farrel
from Single Men Are Like Waffles—Single Women Are Like Spaghetti: Friendship, Romance, and Relationships That Work
by Bill Farrel, Pam Farrel
Harvest House Publishers, 2008

“How to Know If You’re a Victim of Gaslighting.”

“Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum” by Jennifer Cook O'Toole
from Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum
by Jennifer Cook O’Toole
Skyhorse, 2018

For example, Stith et al. use emotional and sexual abuse to “predict” the presence of physical abuse.1 But all these are variations of abusiveness.

“Rethinking Domestic Violence” by Donald G. Dutton
from Rethinking Domestic Violence
by Donald G. Dutton
UBC Press, 2011

also include many forms of divergent verbal and nonverbal behaviors that indicate psychological distance and emotional intensity, from subtle expressions to blatantly dehumanizing name-calling, ethnic jokes, and hate speeches.

“Encyclopedia of Communication Theory” by Stephen W. Littlejohn, Karen A. Foss
from Encyclopedia of Communication Theory
by Stephen W. Littlejohn, Karen A. Foss
SAGE Publications, 2009

In addition, they tend to be very inconsistent, saying one thing and then denying it later (workplace gaslighting), so getting something in writing is essential.

“
from “Don’t You Know Who I Am?”: How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility
by Ramani S. Durvasula Ph.D
Post Hill Press, 2019

These include manipulation, verbal attacks, physical intimidation, lying, fear, and control.

“organisational behaviour in Southern Africa, 2nd edition” by Stephen P. Robbins
from organisational behaviour in Southern Africa, 2nd edition
by Stephen P. Robbins
Pearson Education South Africa, 2009

Table 49-1 lists emotionally abusive strategies used by abusers and common responses to abuse.

“Sheehy’s Manual of Emergency Care E-Book” by ENA, Belinda B Hammond, Polly Gerber Zimmermann
from Sheehy’s Manual of Emergency Care E-Book
by ENA, Belinda B Hammond, Polly Gerber Zimmermann
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2012

Believe it or not, gaslighting made the list.

“Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal” by Dr. Sheri Keffer, Barbara Steffens, Stefanie Carnes
from Intimate Deception: Healing the Wounds of Sexual Betrayal
by Dr. Sheri Keffer, Barbara Steffens, Stefanie Carnes
Baker Publishing Group, 2018

Oktay Kutluk

Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.

Mail: [email protected]
Telephone: +1 (877) 492-3666

Biography: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/kutluk_oktay/
Bibliography: oktay_bibliography

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232 comments

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  • No description can ever accurately portray the experience of being gaslighted. until you have experienced it, you cant imagine it, or imagine how debilitating it can be. Unless you have actually met and been mentally corner by a true narcissist, no description will of gaslighting will ever make sense.

  • There’s actually no such thing as gaslighting. The gaslighters in question are actually telling the truth, which you keep refusing to accept, because you don’t want to swallow your pride and admit your mistake. You can’t expect to have absolutely perfect memory, you know. You’re not a goddamn robot.

  • Strongly Agreed from painful experiences..����������..Gas-lighters are usually people that U put lots of TRUST & CONFIDENT TO..It is even WORST IF they are family members, close friends, co-workers, law enforcements and those who are in the Professional Health Care..With personal experiences who came out “ALIVE” �� from this terrible ordeal of manipulative and controlling events, the Best Advises are: (optional to read ��)����
    1. Meditate to contemplate and to sort out the Original Sources and find out for yourself the answers needed..Only U KNOW THE TRUE ANSWERS, don’t let others tell U otherwise..����
    2. Seek professional help if and only if you FEEL it is needed, not because of coersion from others’ opinions..
    3. Be very cautious that there is NO GUARANTEE the professional help U are seeking is really helpful, but on the contrary could have a reverse effects if all they wanted is ����and load U up with prescriptions of psycho. drugs in addition to labeling all psycho. terminologies on the real problems that U are having..
    In short, just be AWARE of your surroundings and those U are putting your TRUST into plus those U are confide your personal information to..Sincerely wish the Best to those Gas-lighter’s victims to recover well?,���� ����, have FAITH and live the Best Life U deserve in this short lifetime..Have a wonderful TuesdAy (09/08/2020)..��������������

  • I related to every single one of those signs of being gaslighted and it really explains a lot. I always thought of myself as too sensitive and kind of wondered whether I was crazy. Thank you for this video, it’s very eye-opening.

  • I just cut my ties to a gas lighter, permanently. They are mentally ill sorry excuses of human beings let them choke on their ugly personalities! Amen!

  • Dont you hate it when someone has gaslight you when they did something wrong like lie in your face and you saw what they did and denied it but you saw them

  • A couple in which one or both are public figures can experience covert subtle gaslighting meant to manipulate the couple into making the decisions they want to see happen for their best profit. Happened to Wayne Gretsky.

  • I was often labelled “the dramatist” and now I’ve finally figured out I need to do a whole load of inner child liberation / CPTSD recovery. The most priceless response from my narcissistic parent about a year before I figured out what narcissism is was “you’ll be accusing me of child abuse next”. The pre-emptive invalidation that says “you’re the crazy one”.

  • Gaslighting was used against me many times & until a few years ago! did NOT know about this MANIPULATIVE & TOXIC behavior.
    That has changed. Thank you, Janine Driver!

  • I walked out of divorce court with her having custody of four children and yet with no support order against me. No alimony. No order to pay any debt. It’s not that they didn’t try. They did. If I can do it. Why can’t anyone? I’m doing this to help anyone that is in the same situation I was. You guys can contact him for proof and other help regarding hacking and any other related job. His email is stokehackent @ Gmail. Com…

  • Gaslighting occurs when one is too grown up or adult-like for another. The creepy thing about it is that the individual with the problem acts like he is cool with how his companion is. But then he does things to mess with her mind and make her lower and doubt herself. And all bcuz an adult like woman is not what he really want and admires. A woman who is like a little girl is what he wants. Somebody who don’t know herself, believe in herself, is incapable of thinking for herself, and will let her man do whatever he want to her.

    A good depiction of this creepiness is the movie The Stepford Wives. Anybody seen it? It’s a 70’s flick but y’all should watch it bcuz it’s symbolic. The men in the movie seemed completely nice and normal husbands, but they didn’t want a wife with a grown up mind of their own. So they replaced with the wives with robots.

  • This is false “know-how”. Sounds like ‘real stuff’. You need to ‘buy’ that idea to then ‘buy’ the solutions offered here. People who run off the ideas of others are already in the soup. What they will need to come to the conclusion a being can ONLY run on their own ideas. Regardless. Period.

  • I am a Author, Writer, I have written to ENCOURAGE, and INSPIRE others.

    I have written Poetry, articles, I am a Author,
    I have written many articles, to AVERT, Prevent, the violence harm of others.

    I am no different than any other man, or woman, who dislikes harm to others.

    I am No different than any other man or woman who dislikes harm women, and children, or men.

    I am No different than any other Author, Writer, Poet, and those who work in professions of Service, Protective Service, First Responders, and wishes write to protect women, and men, and children.

    I am No different than any other, Writer, Author, Poet, or first responder, public Safety personal, who spends their time and efforts to help others.

    I am No different other than the actual fact, that, I have had actual real, direct, person to person face to face threats from persons in, have been in positions of authority these actual threats to make my life difficult.

    I write in many times to Prevent harm, and Avert harm beforehand.

    This way others can make choices to help prevent, and prepare themselves to Prevent any Potential harm.

    I am NOT a person who would harm anyone else, I am just as any other first responder who wish is Provide protection, Safety, Well being.

    I like people, this why I write to ENCOURAGE and help others, in many ways, throughout my life.

    There are many people throughout our history who have a innate sense to help others.
    I innate sense to Prevent harm.

    I have innate sense to Protect agaist the violence, hurt, and harm of women, children and men.

    These people were allowed to help others in our history.

    I am not trying to be great,

    I am just trying to live with the innate sense to help others, in whatever positive ways I can.

    I have only desired to help others since I was at a very young age.

    *Not everyone likes the idea that I wish to help others.

    *I have been told why should you Care about others.

    *I would never try to hurt anyone.

    *I am Protective person who desires to help others.

    There is a reason why I have repeated this information NOT difficult to figure out why.

    WHY HAVE I WRITTEN REPEATEDLY, THE REASON IS VERY OBVIOUS, their are those who wish to Slander, lie, create situations, and or deliberately lie to cause problems.

    Note from May 25, 2018, 1:15 PM[Blue]
    Note from May 16, 2018, 2:52 PM[Blue]

    I Jason Sandifer, Have Prayed Concerning the following Written below has been previously in various media formats in similar version this is a Reposted.

    I still believe that there has been a Very intense Concerted Efforts to make myself Appear, and be Depicted in a very Negative light, via exploitation of Situational Circumstances in some circumstances in which I am NOT in control of.

    This may be a Direct Result of several prior (Actual) (Direct Threats) (Verbal)

    *(Actual Face to Face conversations) stated to make my Life Very hard, and difficult for me, via some Persons of, and in Authority, and maybe a direct retaliation, and as to Exploit any occurrences of Homelessness, or Situational circumstances, hardships, difficulties, including any loss of employment, layoff, and or any occurrences of unemployment.

    *For a Very literal Example it was stated to me Face to face, (Actually) told to me (Directly) that I looked like I belonged in a cage, like an orangutan, and the person had the ability to ( “make this happen quite easily”).

    *This only just one of many such like Threats I have received Directly via persons of, or in Positions of Authority thru the years. I have done absolutely Nothing Wrong.

    *Yet precarious situations come to me. (Randomly) Not the other way around.

    I DO NOT have any medical issues I am healthy.

    I am NOT on any medications, NOR have I ever been on a regimented prescription medication schedule, I have Never, Ever been on a regimented prescription program other than antibiotics for a cut 15 years ago or so.

    I Do Not Seek Trouble at All. Yet by some, I have been many times Treated like a Criminal (repeatedly).

    (I have) also been
    HIGHLY CONCERNED
    for Family, Friends, and Acquaintances, for
    their Well-Being and Safety.

    In Everything that I Write, Wrote, and have Written, or Speak about it has been to Encourage, and or Help, and or to be of Service to someone else.

    I have moved on, and will continue with Pursuing with My Hopes and Dreams, despite the many precarious situations, situational circumstances, and also (MANY, MANY DIFFICULTIES) which I have faced.

    Although this has been a Serious Threat and Issue.

    I have also been (Highly Concerned for Family, Friends, many Acquaintances), (for their Well Being, Safety and Protection)

    Author, Advocate for Humanity,
    Jason Sandifer-(Advocate for the Preservation of Life), (and for
    Humanity).
    Advocate, Reposted Messages Michigan-(2020)
    5/7/2020
    Reposted
    6/23/2020, 7/8/2020
    6/17/2020
    6/12/2020
    6/5/2020
    5/9/2020,
    8/22/2020c

  • Ingrid Bergman black and white movie when a man married a woman from another country and then lied to her and had the servants change things in the house and make out the wife was unwell. Good film for its time.

  • There was a time when I recorded myself when I was sleeping and woke up to a deleted recording. That’s when I thought at least they won’t kill me. I proved it to myself. I locked everything down and tied a rope. When I woke it it had some slack. Also the person living in the front said what about you letting your friends in at all times of the night. I never let my friends in when I wasn’t awake.

  • interesting, the saying like this is also gaslighting: don’t get up steam! when i see a mismatch and try to clear, as a result a person answers al the time.

  • Can we talk about how people try to gaslight you into thinking things weren’t as bad as they were like “things weren’t bad except this one tiny thing, but other than that one hiccup, things were good!”

  • what if its my own mother, everytime i talk to her i end up crying then yelled at for not being an adult and controlling my emotions. ( im 22), idk but everytime we go through this i end up overthinking everything for days… while she remains unaffected then comes at me again.

  • Or if you tell them you are not amused by their put down attitude, they simply say when it’s getting to complicated for them:
    “I got to go” or they hang up in the middle of a ‘conversation’. Very arrogant and rude. They are unable to finish a discussion in a mature respectful way and they trigger you to react from a powerless feeling. Taking all of your energy. Putting all of our effort in a bully.
    When you speak up they will shut you down or interrupt you. Leaving you with an angry frustrated and hurt feeling.
    Horrible and very destructive for a human being.
    They always start a stupid issue through criticism or whatever it is and then end it while the topic is unfinished.
    I guess that’s how they like to torture and bully their victim.
    They create distortion to leave you with the toxic mess and wikk repeat this endlessly as long as we are in contact with them.

  • How about you are watching them gaslight you. You are privy to ever nuance. But they stand before you and continue. It’s like having a bratty 10 year old that is 62 and saying Dear stop lighting the matches on both ends. It is not helping your cause!! You are destroying life long friends with your pure stupidity!!!! Grow up!!!!

  • Agree…Gaslighters are insecure, egoistical and childish people. I often deal with them. Ignore them and avoid them as much as you can! Though, most of them are brilliant because they have tons of ‘masks’ and strategies to avoid detection.

  • Been gaslighted by my daughter for years. I’m almost 80 years old and she will be 60 years old next month. We’ve had relationship issues for years and I’m always that bad guy. Learning about narcissism has opened my eyes to what has been going on for years. She has lived with me for 3 1/2 years, but, I asked her to leave and feel so much better in my mind and emotions! Thank you for your program and have subscribed to your podcast. A huge weight has been lifted off of me. I’m really not old and senile! ��

  • When I was severely affected by PPD and hadn’t slept in months, a therapist gaslit me by telling me that I’d been raped by a member of my family. I protested that it was false and she told me she wouldn’t be able to work with me if I couldn’t be honest. That was unreal.

  • One time this guy gaslighted me and then I tried to ask a friend and she was agreeing with him so I thought I was crazy but they were actually just working together to gaslight me and my real friend told me I wasn’t crazy I’m like omfg…

  • Narcissists are 1 in 10. Sociopaths are 1 in 15. Psychopaths are 1 in 25. I don’t know the stats of Codependent enablers or flying monkeys but my point is they are all around us. Our politics, politicians, media, political commercials and the foreign actors and bots are all using these tactics to promote a emotional response to get you to act. It is all a tactic of class B personality disorders.

  • If anyone in your life tries to gaslight you, treat them as if they were talking to a wall. Arguing with them is a waste of time.

  • Well I just can’t fine friends that are real everyone around me is fake they talk about me behide my back everyday I am at my low and I just don’t have someone I can talk to this is my hole problem I am a looks for 20 year sense my husband die I am Trier of being alone

  • My narcissistic mother is the biggest Gaslighter I have ever met she has literally turned every person who is my friend or if I have siblings against me try to play me crazy like I have special disorder is when I don’t she’s just a liar and he constantly tries to make situations food for herself tries to make herself seem as a high rate empath but she’s just manipulative and talk down on me and she allows other people to talk down to me and was also happy when I was in a abusive relationship I can see through everything just pray for God to keep you safe until you get out of the situation. Gas lighters they try to play on your memory and act like your feelings are insignificant to theirs. Bird behavior

  • The whole world is gaslighting me. That’s why I don’t believe anything anyone says. I just nod and smile when they are playing their games.

  • I feel like I’ve just left jail.. i feel like when u finally feel free.. you just wanna talk about it cuz u didn’t feel like you could before.

  • Can someone tell me why I repeatedly get in relationships where I am gaslighted? Even when I consciously think I’m avoiding people like this.

  • Both of my parents are abusive narcissists. Their favorite phrases are “that never happened”, “you don’t know what you are talking about”, “I never said that”.

  • Leave the gaslighter, simple. Personality disorders can be treated (temporarily) but have no cure.
    It’s so ingrained in them its like second nature.

  • I have known more people who were trying to impose their will and worldview on others, who would then accuse those around them of gaslighting if they confronted them, as opposed to true gaslighters. More frequently the so-called gaslighter was the one calling BS on someone else’s error and misbehavior.

  • The problem is with your partner’s evil intent, not you. Why the heck he would do such a harmful thing to your mind in the first place. The minute he starts doing that it’s time to cut him loose. Period.

  • My family gaslit me. I was physically abused by my brother as a teen, and most recently 2015 at my dads funeral..my mother told me I was the issue and it hurts that not one family member defended me. My abuser still manipulates me. My mother more angry that i talked to a policeman friend than she is that ive been abused. Mom is 80 now. I feel like its pointless th o try to make her understand what this has done to me.

  • My x best friend tried to destroy my love relationship told me it wasn’t true and was abusing me on phone and told me I was evil..she was so jealous cause I found a decent love and she tried to destroy every good word I shared..I kicked her friendship out the door no more gaslighting me

  • I didn’t say that. I said this. Then I said that, but I meant this. That was her pattern. Lie, deny, and say you weren’t smart enough to understand what she said. You took it negatively like you always do is what she was saying. It was just “your perception”. She thought she was always one step ahead, she lied, deflected, blamed, and always had a logical flaw to her version of things.

  • Icut the cameras. Deadass. all jokes aside wtf I didn’t know what this was but I just learned and dammmnn I thought I was just insecure ��

  • Many become “sick” when gas lighted to point they have to seek mental health care. Those in abusive relationships that are highly controlling can even convince you to submit to procedures such as ECT or electroshock. Following this procedure as it inflicts traumatic brain injury in their outcomes, patients become docile, apathetic, have memory loss for marital issues that led to admission, more compliant and controllable. Given their neurocognitive issues gas lighting becomes more intense experience for them and reality checks more difficult. Please see videos under you tube heading of ectjustice so you can inform yourselves and others of this greatly increased practice taking place at leading facilities. When you learn the truth of this I hope you will warn others on public social to what you have learned.

  • I think I actually got lucky.. my gas lighter was so offended I ended things, they’ve managed to convince themselves they were in an imaginary relationship, in which they were “cheated on” and then they broke up… With themselves.. �� I can’t even.. talk about alternate realities..I just let him break up with himself.. I mean.. what r ya gonna do.. at least they didn’t go Columbine.. yet ��

  • I was friends with a gaslight. It was a nightmare. And after I blocked him he started a smear campaign on me online till I had to report him. Never let someone use and abuse you. See the red flags and signs before it gets worse. Your health is more important than someone’s sadistic needs.

  • This might sound naive but… When someone is accusing you of doing (which you are not) the exact thing that they are actually doing right there in that moment.. is that considered gaslighting or is it technically something else? Example: This person tends to always dramatically ruin holidays for years, then you don’t want to go somewhere with then on Thanksgiving and they go on and on about how you don’t handle holidays very well, probably because of your horrible childhood. (This is taking place on Thanksgiving morning after 2 hours of complaining about their family members that were going to see soon)

  • I have been the victim of gas-lighting with every single one of these traits. So, I’ll be voting to get out of this relationship on November 3rd.

  • My gaslighting ex husband wouldn’t let me end conversations unless I agreed verbally with his made-up reality. I would tell him I was done with the conversation, and he would scream at me “why won’t you talk to me? Why won’t you talk to me?” Often being late at night, he wouldn’t let me sleep. He’d punch my pillow over and over right next to my head insisting “Talk to me. Why won’t you talk to me?”

    Sometimes I’d try to get out of bed in my PJ’s and go to my car to try to drive to a local hotel. But he was extremely strong and wouldn’t let me close my door, or he’d stand behind my car so I couldn’t back up. One time I tried to back up anyway while he was holding onto the door and he pretended to fall. I got worried he’d sue me, and stayed at home. It was a long 7 years.

  • Yep, have had that invalidation of feelings the ‘you have no right to feel that way’ from a narcissist. I wondered why it left me so confused. And I would agree, there is nothing further that should be said or would help in dealing with that person.

  • To be honest, I’m not sure if my ex was gaslighting me or if she really remembered numerous events and conversations so drastically differently from the way I did, but it got to the point where I suggested we should wear body-cams just so we could see what really happened.

  • I realized last year my sister who I am very close with is a gas lighter! I didnt realize how bad it was until recently when I cought her trying to manipulate my memories for her own gain! When i called her out she said “she was joking” i told her shes tried to do this to me multiple times in the past but since i didn’t have any solid examples she completely denied it ��
    I’m thinking of cutting her out of my life but I feel like I would be abandoning her and I’m the only person shes close with!

  • I always hated women start teaseing me. Get me all aroused for sex and find out later on, that I am not getting anything. This BULLSHIT has all ways happen to me and it suckes.

  • There are really too many to relate here, as I have been surrounded by narcissists for most of my life. I have systematically removed all the toxic people from my life that I could, and those I do have to deal with I simply distance myself from them emotionally and interact with them as infrequently as possible. Videos such as Dr. Ramani’s have been extremely helpful in helping me deal with the narcissistic abuse I have suffered, and I am truly grateful for her help.

  • I waa roommates with my ex bf, now were not anymore. I think after watching this, i have been gas lighted, i feel like with in the past years it was from also more than one person. Does anyone know do they ever change or does their true colors come out?

  • Few things have hurt more than when somebody I thought was a friend is seemingly more than happy to dissect my life and keep their own hidden. I’m finally starting to simply give up on people who don’t share meaningful information about themselves on a regular basis. I think vulnerability is vital to a friendship, and the people I used to consider my core group heavily disagree. Time to get a new core group.

  • This video is advising you to take a narcissist to therapy? The narrator most probably doesn’t know what really causes gaslighters to gaslight. He honestly thinks your cute spouse just needs “psychotherapy”. They gaslight you once, run for the door! Never to look back. Be gone! Narcissists are dangerous and demonic.

  • Could you make a vídeo about HOW CAN WE AVOID gaslighting someone else?
    This kind of video is really useful! Thank your for your hard work on this and other series of videos.
    But some of the expressions used when gaslighting are SO COMMON, that I consider some of them practically automatic, almost unconscious, a conditioned response we might have in some contexts.

  • What about the gaslighting inflicted in court by a defense lawyer to the witness/victim in a sexual assault case? When they are denying your reality of events and trying to make you doubt your statements, in front of silent bystanders (judges, jury, clerks etc)… it’s systemic, socially accepted galighting but the effect are just as debilitating on the victim who has the courage to complain.:'(

  • I’d totally ‘like’ to expose my ex, whose emails and text messages I saved for our last two years of our ‘no win’ relationship but….I believe she’ll end up alone ( not happy alone because she’s terrified of the thought ) and miserable ( No, I hope she doesn’t!! ) because she’s an intolerable ‘me me me’ human being. I saved the messages to totally ‘out her’ of a bullshit IG version of her. I didn’t but I have 76 pages of the real *****, just in case.

  • Experienced every single thing mentioned above with my previous partner for 3 years. This affected my trust in myself and my memory in general immensely. I had a pretty good memory, and I had lost it. It not only affected my memory for things then on but I had lost connection to who I was before the relationship, my own memories felt like someone else’s stories. It took me 2 years to get back more or less regain the functioning of my memory and over 2 and a half years to start remembering who I was before the relationship and connect back to my previous experiences.

  • I saw my girlfriend ex’s name pop up on her phone. I didn’t say anything right away and then I brought it up. She got mad and defensive. Showed me her contact list and it wasn’t in there. I felt like I was going crazy. Then I saw on her phone she has a number she’s been texting but doesn’t have it saved. I feel like that’s her ex. I’ve been trying so hard to make her happy and I feel like she’s been so angry and irritated lately. I asked her if she was okay and she said I just can’t read you. I can’t tell if your being sarcastic. I told her I don’t like being sarcastic because people think I’m just being an asshole when I’m sarcastic. We went to her grandparents house the other day. She wanted to hit my Juul. I said that’s fine and that I was going to leave my Juul in the car so that I could charge it. She was like that’s cool I’m still going to hit your juul. I said I was being agitated or anything. I was just letting you know that I’m leaving it in the car in case you asked to hit it again.

  • People need to keep in mind that self doubt is healthy in moderation, you should always temper your decisions with skepticism. Remain aware of things that may impair logical reasoning like manipulation from others but do not use the term gaslighting to justify ignoring rational criticism.

  • I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my ex-husband started getting frequent night calls, I would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time I could take no more of his lies, I decided I deserve to know what was going on so I contacted this great hacker Dr Nevetica via [email protected] who helped clone his phone. All I did was share his phone number and through a remote link sent to my own phone, I was able to access all of his texts, calls and social media messages (Incoming, outgoing and deleted) which was how I discovered he has been cheating. Thanks to Dr Nevetica, I can now file for divorce.

    If you need help or that little bit of closure, I advice you get in touch with Dr Nevetica on [email protected] and I hope you find peace of mind just like myself after I discovered the truth.

  • They “minimize” their actions and “magnify” your every move. It’s so bad
    that I’ve gotten good at “grey rock”. And I hope everyone could learn that.

  • I’ve definitely had long & detailed texts that were erased unread… �� She told me that she would do it because she “already knew that the text was gonna make her upset.” SMH Sadly spot on man.

  • After 25 yrs of my abuser working at the fuctory*..better know as the *factory*.. noone ever contacted me. Ever. I knew none of them. I was busy working and taking care of my kids and the home and HIM. Suddenly a co worker began contacting me.Talking about our love of Mastiffs. Odd.. I do love my Mastiff but this is a stranger.. she then began letting cats out of the bag that hes been telling co workers he cant leave me because of a race car trailer( how humiliating but hes into racing and I guess feels he might lose his precious trailor?) Anyway.. at same time hes texting another train wreck woman. I’d confront him and get the typical *shes pursuing me *the other lady just wants to break up our marriage. I never said that about the trailer*. Gaslighting and lying go hand in hand and the embarassment/!&humiliation you’re getting by them comparing you to a RACE CAR TRAILER is really pathetic

  • Many become “sick” when gas lighted to point they have to seek mental health care. Those in abusive relationships that are highly controlling can even convince you to submit to procedures such as ECT or electroshock. Following this procedure as it inflicts traumatic brain injury in their outcomes, patients become docile, apathetic, have memory loss for marital issues that led to admission, more compliant and controllable. Given their neurocognitive issues gas lighting becomes more intense experience for them and reality checks more difficult. Please see videos under you tube heading of ectjustice so you can inform yourselves and others of this greatly increased practice taking place at leading facilities. When you learn the truth of this I hope you will warn others on public social to what you have learned.

  • Covid 19 is gaslighting by big pharma and the media. Millions will starve to death from the lockdown measures. Our governments are putting us all in debt to the tune of trillions and big pharma is making billions with government funds for a “vaccine” for the COMMON COLD. Coronaviruses are the COMMON COLD. And there is no cure for the common cold.

  • Oh my god…. I was told by family I “had a sensitivity” to a particular family member… so much guilt and gaslighting…. that only years later I am finally working thru

  • yes I watch them on TV every day you know CNN Communists News Network, MSNBC, Mighty, Stupid, No, Brain, Crap, CBS, Create, Bull, $hit, ABC and so on all it has been for the last 20 years is OPERATION MOCKINGBIRD using a different name now but funder to the hilt…. Ikts YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK!!

  • Your voice is very soothing. Thanks for this. Please don’t exclude this in childhood it happens in families. I have had all 10 done to me by my NPD mother, most about 7/10 done to me by my G’ma (Mum’s mum) and about 5 done by my brother. My younger bro was the golden child, I the scapegoat. When she betrayed me at the age of 8 and didn’t believe me when I told her about her BF hitting me and then lying about it, it was a downward spiral in our relationship.

    He would beat me for no reason, I never knew why, he would get so angry and just start wailing on me. I still hear in my memory my little boy screams to this day…the screaming was not the pain…but the terror…it was terrifying…I still can not work out what I did to invoke his wrath as I was actually a good child, I never rocked the boat, but I would stand up for myself. I can always remember that I would say something back to him when he was angry. It wasn’t in a belligerent way or nasty or tantrum style it was usually said very calmly and matter of fact style to him. Then he’d lose it and all he see in front of him now would be a punch bag.

    The BF became my step dad and the physical abuse from him continued from age 8 till age 15. Her NPD toward me fully kicked in toward me around age 9. By age 12 I was no longer confiding in her. She would later say how we were the best of friends when I was young but I changed into this horrible person. Projection.

    She was using what I told her to hurt me in many different ways…ridicule me in front of people for one (especially large social gatherings which I hated so would be hiding with other kids and playing), she’d always yell me out across the room or backyard or wherever we were if she just caught a glimpse of me. It didn’t matter if I was moving around enjoying myself with the other kids… there was no reason for her to say demeaning things about me to other people in front of me. The looks I would get…I would just want to be absorbed into the ground. Or it would happen at home, usually trying to manipulate me somehow. When it wouldn’t work the gas lighting would start in the form of projection.

    I never knew what gaslighting was. I am 44. My mum died 7 months ago. GC brother gets everything. She even put it all in a trust so I couldn’t legally claim. I didn’t care about that. Amongst all the cptsd I am going through now part of it is because of how I had always hoped me and my bro would get a chance to build a friendship. Alas no he hates me. Mum slandered and slurred me to him most of my life. I only worked it out a year or so ago. I mourn for the relationship(s) I always wanted with them but never had.

    The black hole I am stuck in has no bottom or light. Childhood trauma is real and soul destroying. I am only holding on just now. I will survive but fuck, I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.

  • My first relationship was with abuser,who did pretty much all of these. I ended up isolated from friends and family, not sharing any of what was happening, trapped in the shame and guilt cycles. He was neglected as a child and with abusive father, I believed he was a good person who needed someone to show him better ways. I was feeling like a shadow, dead inside for a long time. At some point I started getting closer with some friends in my high school class, started spending a bit more time with them and by myself also, and gradually i started feeling myself more and connecting with myself. Soon i started studying in a nearby city, and thats when i found strength to finally put an end to that relationship. Feeling of freedom was amazing. But that was one of the worst experiences I had in life.

  • “gaslighting” is right up there with “strawman” as examples of the dumbest terms possible to be used to reference the act of someone emotionally abusing or manipulating others for their own benefit or enjoyment, why don’t they call them hedge trimming and lawn watering, those terms would make about as much sense…………

  • Eek, we’ve had a narcissistic roommate for a month (Yes, one) before his crazy ass got kicked out. He did the full gamut of deflecting, minimizing, verbal diarrhea and treating the entire house like it belonged to him. It was horrid, but props to our landlady for not having his shit and promptly evicting his ass. Only now, 9 months later we’ve gotten over that.

  • 5:50–> When she spoke of writing a long e-mail to the gaslighter, this resonated so strongly with me on the nose! I realized one of my closest friends was a covert narcissist, and I was in denial for the longest time (I’m a high Empathyes, the perfect target ��). It took me finally asserting my feelings about something that was actually very minor (but major for me to address as I’m highly agreeable and forgiving), where I saw the rest of the behavior of her narcissism unfold like a ripple effect. I did not* anticipate that reality; needless to say, it was extremely painful and she cut off communication completely when I asserted a shortcomings of our friendship (I.e. I was being used and had been feeling an imbalance, though I framed it much differently with respect, kindness, and love as the framework ) and her response was callous and completely took me by surprise! In retrospect, it confirmed that me feeling used in the relationship as a one-way giving to her was valid ��. She was angry and was on the offense and I immediately apologized if I hurt her and told her my intention wasn’t cruel and I wanted to protect thr friendship, that’s why I breached it because I felt something was harming our relaitionship, and like a switch she replied with a single phrase, “Maybe it’s best we don’t communicate.” And ghosted me completely for almost a year.

    She convinced those around her that I ‘blew up’ at her, and used certain private things I confided to her about my life against me (I.e. ‘her family has mental health issues, and it’s starting to show in her now as well it seems; she just blew up at me for no reason when I was checking in on her.’). She distorted the reality of what happened and weaponized my vulnerabilities against me to those who knew us.

    It wasn’t until I showed proof of texts & dialogue recordings to her relationships, did they start to pressure her to mend her mistake because the evidence showed that she was in fact the perpetrator against me. If I hadn’t countered with evidence to those around her, she would have been content ghosting me completely (over a five year relationship as best friendssame community since children) & subtly reframing the perception of our peers against me. Upon the insistence of her husband and family, she wrote the most disingenuous letter to me (in response to a closure letter I wrote a year prior when she cut me off) in an effort to safeguard the image of herself to those I exposed her to by showing evidence of her behavior towards me & my effort to call her to accountability. A complete evil fraud. Her sister Sally* had the decency to share a dialogue between my former friend and Sally two days prior, where Sally convinced her sister to apologize to me and rectify the wrongs she had perpetrated as I was the real victim; this was two days before the former friend wrote me a letter to ‘mend’ the relationship, and it was such a contrast of indifferent, cruel, and mocking words compared to the letter asking for forgiveness and filled with loving recollection of memories that she wrote to me under pressure from her husband and sisters who she wanted to maintain her image in front of. I realized how dark she was and did no contact immediately after I saw the clear-cut reality. Her sister Sally did me the best favor by showing me the messages between Sally and her sister (I.e. former best friend) to be able to see the disingenuousness of her sisters heartit was like a Jekyll & Hyde scenario, I was in complete shock and very angry for being manipulated & my kindness exploited.

    These people are the worst kind of people.

  • I had a boss like this. I provided hard evidence showing what he accused me of was false. So he couldn’t fire me with cause. So he laid me off instead, and had the gall to say on my way out to next time, not try to defend myself.

  • The 3 I hear the most: 1. If you didn’t look the way you do. 2. This is all happening (financial and marriage troubles) as the result of your actions! 3. If you hadn’t put me in jail! Mind you jail was the result of a scuffle because I wouldn’t back down. Again I was manipulated back and I’m still here today. Fml

  • You can’t win when someone gaslights you. Personally I just don’t engage with my mom whenever she starts gaslighting. I talk with my mom, but I use a lot of tactics like I am talking to a Union person. I’m always on guard when talking to my mom.

  • This described my ex-wife perfectly. After 25 yrs of marriage I can confirm that Gaslighters do not change. It was hell being married to her. I never knew what it was called until watching this video.

  • It takes enormous self belief to beat the best efforts of these people.
    Questioning everything would be exhausting, just keep a skeptical eye on things, for your own sake.
    Trust your own judgement.

  • When I was a child I always dreamed of being able to record the things my mom said to me because nobody believed me. And she told the people nasty lies about me.

  • You have helped me with clarifying just how messed up this person I work with really is. My mind was racing around for months wondering why I couldn’t except him. Now I get it. THANK YOU?

  • Wow. My parents are narcissist and my father would frequently say you’re too cold and you’re not eating enough when that was all clearly not the case. It’s so simple but so dismissive of your actual experience

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  • Alain de coninck marries rich woman, steal their money, and disapears! He worked for aldi, norma, rosetta stone in phoenix arizona and lives n9w in zwitserland, schwyz with his 5th wife! Jeanette gillman! A crook and conmen!

  • I have just spent 6 months on remand in a shit hole prison in England over false allegations made against me by an ex partner I left 15 years ago. She lied to the Police who didn’t do anything against me and then once she didn’t get her way through that route when to the Family Court and got these weak judges to put a non molestation and prohibitive steps order on me. They can do this without your knowledge. I then got arrested at the end of March, improsoned by magistrates on remand and then everything closed down over Covid so I couldnt get a court hearing for the next 4 months. In prison I wrote to the family courts pointing out her lies and contradictions and when they came back in send a Barrister to the Crown Court to ask a Judge to release me. They know they have fucked up, she has lied and mislead them and now she is in trouble.This woman has never left me alone in 15 years and even her boyfriend who she’s been with for 12 years gives me trouble as well. She has all of the classic signs and I am learning more and more through these video’s. I once said to her weak Flying Monkey boyfriend that I didn’t understand why he gives me shit,,, I didnt leave him I left her and how can he be pissed at me for leaving his girlfriend. It’s totally crazy.

  • Very difficult to concentrate on the conversation when it’s being recorded at a distance and unable to see their faces. And not sure why the creepy recording man on the right needed to make an appearance. Close up so much better. Dr. Ramani content brilliant as usual.

  • My hubby had to recorded conversations with his mom, since she never remembered what she said. Then, she’d say-‘that’s not what meant’. She also was caught in lies. Now they don’t speak, don’t have a relationship. It’s easier that way on him.

  • You have no right to feel this way. Right on.
    You can win….turn the table next time say

    I dont think you feel this way.

    Shine the mirror on their face. I dont see it happpened ever!

  • My gf and I are taking a break and she says that I’m gaslighting her. At first I was thinking about it and it makes sense but now i don’t know after watching this video. I know I’ve said things that I shouldn’t have and I know I’ve purposefully made her feel bad at times with comments I’ve made, but I’ve never made fun of her insecurities or made her feel bad about herself. The biggest mindfu*k for me is trying to figure out if I’m gaslighting her, she’s gaslighting me, or if neither of us are.

    Edit: Obviously we’ve both done things during arguments to make each other feel bad, it’s not just me making her feel bad all the time

  • The part where it says they give you praise and then turn around and insult you…I feel that one. Mind games. This is why God says flattery is deceitful.

  • I left after 10 years and didn’t respond when she blocked me out on everything. In other words, I took this opportunity to get help from a therapist and now I am on the road to healing.:-)

  • This really helped me today. I have someone occasionally toxic in my circle who took a personal argument and posted it on a small-circle chat group intentionally to make me look bad, drawing an original subject of me feeling hurt from the way they talk to me (which in their eyes is invalid since they are entitled to having me forgive anything without question), to demanding ‘love’ without criticism and focusing on ‘you hate me’ a moot argument they cannot prove and would not oblige them to behave responsibly even were it true (which I would be entitled to based on some of their treatment). This video really helped me in recognising human behaviour patterns *WITHOUT LABELING THE PERSON*, since people don’t have to be ‘a narcissist’ to behave on the basis of a fragile ego; most people have some form of a fragile ego, I think, but some of us will self doubt while others have to disqualify all and any criticism toward them since they cannot cope with it.
    This person I am dealing with, also refuses to record how they talk. When they argued I cannot prove their ill behaviour, I honestly thought they would like to learn from it and suggested they can record it and reflect on it later (same as a music student will record their own practice and listen later to figure out their blindspots), but of course they were enraged at the proposition their ill unfair treatment can be proven, kept trying to say it cannot be proven and that no one would agree with me, and then when I brought tangible quotes demanded to know who thinks so (as if I would let her forward toxicity to them too).
    The result? More manipulations coming, and I am in an intensive course in UNLEARNING self doubt, and learning how to better navigate future arguments so the person doesn’t keep claiming some high moral highground while getting away from the actual point, which is their behaviour injures others around them and they haven’t acknowledged or taken responsibility for their actions. ❤️

  • I know im being gaslighted but i stand so firm.in my own toughts that i know what the other says isnt right and i just let the other think what they want agree with them and keep my own toughts

  • Interesting that gaslight in counseling was mentioned as that’s exactly what happened to me. The counselor essentially was undermining my perceptions, without offering any evidence that they were “faulty thinking” which it wasn’t. Once my perceptions were validated, then I could address how to respond, rather than just re-writing my reality.

  • The weirdest conversation I had with a narcissist. We were talking about auto insurance prices (I know exciting right?) Then electric scooters came up, that you didn’t need insurance for some of them as well as bikes. And for some reason the fact these vehicles didn’t need insurance made her mad and automatically tried arguing with me about it. I really didn’t care, I was just stating fact that these certain kinds of vehicles didn’t need it. But she started yelling and getting frustrated with me cause I was stating fact rather then opinion. Eventually I dropped the conversation since we were talking in circles and getting no where..

  • My ex girlfriend gaslighted me. I had no idea what was up or down. I apologized for everything. It was always my fault, and I believed her. She kept other guys on the back burner. She would tell me how much i was disappointing her. She would run to these guys whenever something was wrong. She left me after I started questioning her stories that changed day by day. She started dating one of those guys the day after she left me. Once I got some distance, I figured it all out. I am so much happier now that I’m free.

  • can gaslighting cause someone to have perceptual issues with enough time? can it cause the victim to gaslight others unintentionally?

  • Thank you for this, God bless you… Therefore, It related to my past, i was badly abused… Thank God i am definitely delivered and no one will ever even try to dream to do that shit to me ever again…

  • what about getting accused of being gaslighted and not even knowing what it is, trying to ask what it is and then getting the reply you know what it is and such. ” Your Gaslighting me stop it,” ” What is gaslighting”, You kn ow your doping it, ” I dont even know what it is’ Yes you do “! If I was gaslighting I was completly innocent in it. Thats what lead me here, to look up what it is. Also my gf who is actually a therapist was the one acusing me of it. ( just thought that is notable as goes my question.) Am I the one getting gaslit? as the example I gave? I was the one who didnt know, actually didnt know and was totaly not doing it, according to what the video says. apparantly I do it alot. as of resently stated. B ut I dont. agan, am I the one being gaslit? I cant think of anyhting ive done to make her question herself. opinions?

  • I clearly understand that this video is all abusive relationship,but I am struggling with gaslighters on my daily life which really motivated me to post something about gaslighting. Most of the time, they treat me like if I am acting different than a normal human being, which really annoy me when I came across these evils.

  • I have been gaslighted several times….I was depressed and lonely….Then I finally cut them off from my life and living a lone-wolf life which is more satisfying than staying having fun in abusive relationships….

  • Had a roommate and a female friend who did this to me. Was going into a downward spiral. Ended with me having to move back to my parents and that was 5 years ago. It’s better now though I still suffer from dysthymia even though I have medication. Thank you for just informing me that is what it’s called and also thanks to Tom Scott who informed me of your channel.

  • thanks for the information. i am a hsp and feel that gaslighting along with bullying is the major problem. all the things you talked about are very real in many of past situations but the worst one instill suffer with is speaking up in confrontation conflict situations for fear of being raped over the coal with words. so i stay quiet and usually think I don’t matter.

  • I was so depressed because this person did ask this, got mad at myself for letting this person make me feel like this. So I started asking if these things were true of me. I found you, thank you, thank you, thank you for being here. I needed to hear this. It isn’t me!!! I feel better and worse at the same time.

  • Sometimes my parents will say things like “maybe if we had hit you growing up you’d act smarter.” Other times, they act like I have no aspirations or goals even though I’ve told them the things I have thought of doing with my life. I really do feel that they gaslight me. I’ll tell them something they they’ll act like I Never said anything. It’s one of the most frustrating things ever.

  • My Mom would say I was too sensitive and my Dad would say that never happened. Also that I think too much and take things too seriously. My sister makes you feel like everything is your fault and you never even know how the argument started. My brother is a pathological liar and you’re not allowed to have a feeling or a thought different than his. Good grief. The only way I get along is to literally just nod and say un huh. My sister starts all the arguments in our family and nobody ever knows how they started and when they don’t turn out the way she wants then she’s the victim some how. I’m so done

  • I remember my mom punching me in the back and knocking the wind out of me when I was a child and I asked my mom about it and she said that it didn’t happen. I sat there questioning whether it was a dream or not, since I was a kid when it happened I didn’t know if I was remembering a dream as a memory. Honestly to this day I still don’t know if it actually happened. But what I do know is that it hurt and it felt like it did.

  • I trust your name. I trust your spirit.
    I love your heart, Katherine.
    I miss the original….
    I miss taking walks together, I miss everything we did together.

    How do we win together?
    We have to trust.

    Unity will always survive.

    I love you

  • I literally started to questioning myself and my sanity! When he said things and said “ I never said that”, also a lot of controversial situations. Like mentioning something and then if I mention something and made the same exact comment, he would say otherwise. It’s like insanity ��

  • Thanks for the Post here now it’s clear that i am in a relationship with a Narcissist now I don’t know how to end it up when i do love my Narcs ��

  • There is a thing I discovered, choreographing a person’s state of mind,through the music and movies they watch only around you,putting on a false act of negative persona, People have told me people I know died,then I find out they were not.this person told me he has cancer, then I find out he does not,if someone starts draining your spirt,LEAVE and fast

  • I took a photo of my narcs ID and send it to my mom the ID said he was born 1965 age 55 so my mom is insisting hes 45 yrs old that shes 64 and hes 22 yrs younger than her when tha makes him 55nif henwas born in 1965 is this gaslighting?

  • Making u question your own sanity, it may just be easier to go along with what they said because the agurment is so intense but that changes your thinking.

    What I said to my dad today “I am worried if I give in, I lose my individuality (like I did as a child because of her) “no you won’t” he tells me

    My dad is NOT seeing what I see

  • Fact: 99% of the time the word “gaslighting” is brought up is by “victims” who refuse to accept responsibility. Because all those gaslighting quotes are not gaslighting at all, they’re actually true.

  • Im goind to add tips by videoing what happened when you were with the gaslighter so you will have a concret prove about the reality

  • Gaslighters ALWAYS PERSIST IN TRYING TO MAKE YOU BELIEVE YOUR THIS HUGE POS.. ITS PATHETIC… ITS HAPPENED TO ME SO MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE WITH INSECURE POS DIABOLICAL HATERS THAT I ACTUALLY FEEL LIKE I AM A SUPER DECENT PERSON,, CAUSE IF I WASNT THEY WOULDN’T BE DOING EVERYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO MAKE ME AND ANYONE AROUND ME BELIEVE IT. THESE ASSHOLES ARE SO FIRED THE MOMENT I SENSE THEY WANT TO TEAR ME DOWN EMOTIONALLY. FUCKING LOSERS CAN ONLY FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEIR OWN BASIC HATING JEALOUS SELVES BY ABUSING AND FUCKING UP SOMEONE ELSE’S SHIT! I AVOID BASIC BITTER ASS MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE FAKE AS FUCK LIKE THE PLAGUE!! #ENERGYVAMPIRES #SADISTIC #ARROGANTAF

  • I mean, the minute he blamed txt to speech for saying I wanted to hang out with him was probably the most corny excuse.. like your gonna blame a machine for your audio hallucinations?? When your on that many drugs.. I mean no wonder you hear and see shit that isn’t there

  • They devalue you.
    Never want to sort any issues out usually his.
    Move the goal points
    Twist and manipulate any conversation.
    Empty promises
    Not treated special. No dates. Just him coming over to my place for love affection pampering and me always slavinv over the cooker doing his dinners.
    He got all the wifey perks but gave little in return what an asshole.
    He had it good until i after 2 years of his bullshit i woke up.
    When i wa sick he never toook care of me or had my back on anything.
    He would disappear until ever with me was fine.
    WOW!!, ����

    Mine was also so selfish in every way and so fake.
    He never showed me any real love intimacy and affection only when he wanted sex which he was crap at.
    Funny thingis he really believed he was awesome in the sack lol��
    I never even one frigging orgasamum the whole time i was with this faker.
    I told him straight about his selfish self absorbed ways. Everything!!
    And how shit he was in the sack too!
    That crush him lol! ������
    That was the final nail in the coffin.��
    Then i told him to leave my flat which he did.
    Blocked everywhere but he emailed me last week after 2mths me no contact of course. About how he loves and misses me.
    Yeah right! ��
    All ingnored deleted or spamed mail and all deleted.
    The funny thing is the idiot never ever told me not even once in the 2 losey years that he loved and cared about me.
    The whole time we where together. ��
    He must think i would fall for his hoovering tricks again.
    Fortunately it didnt work cos i no longer have any feelings love anf respect for him.
    He killed with his toxic bullshit selfish behaviour.
    That finally wrapped it up for me. ������
    I finally lost all feelings and respect for him.
    Ive moved on and giving the attention love and care that i neglected to myself!
    Man it feels so dam good!
    ������

    I dumped him after 2 year of his bullshit!
    What a relief im now happy. ��

  • My elder brother is a big Gaslighter,which I realized lately in my life (30+ yrs)…. Now I feel more confident towards doing best in my life because I passed the depression stage which was so horrible…. I look forward to punishing him for what he did to me ������

  • Es ist eine Weile her, seit sich meine Geliebte Haltung von der zu ändern geändert hat
    Fürsorglicher Typ, für den er sich überhaupt nicht interessiert hat. Aber nicht lange, später entdeckte ich, dass mein Geliebter eine Affäre mit jemand anderem hatte, aber nur innerhalb von 48 Stunden kontaktierte ich Dr.okosod über dieses Detail (drokosod @ gmail com) oder whatssap 2348101839583 mein Geliebter kehrte zurück und löste sich von dem anderen Mädchen, mit dem er eine Beziehung hatte.

  • @Kati Morton What do you think about governments/health organizations and mainstream media gaslighting men and woman over Covid 19? I see these parallels everyday.

  • Burn all the gas-lighters with brilliant flames, and use it as fuel to improve your own situation! Love and Hate are the only emotions humans can use effectively to motivate positive changes in their own lives. You can’t positively change a persons thinking without demonstrating your own abilities to effectively change yourself for the better. Don’t talk to people about your plans to change, inside let them witness it through their own eyes. Actions will always speak louder than words. Rise above the madness and claim your own mountain top! It’s more peaceful up there anyways!

  • I use to work with a guy I called the “mind monster”. He was constantly pointing the finger at the quality of work by others in our dept. He stayed away from me as soon as I called him out on it. I told him he was doing these crappy things to others, bc he was insecure about his own abilities. “If everyone is looking at someone else, they’re not looking at me”.

  • It is so hard to recover and find people who you can trust �� I basically have all the signs she mentioned, specially the last 2. I think I was manipulated by my siblings when I was a kid, sometimes I still perceive some of those traits in them. And now I’m always worried if other are manipulating me or not, I can’t recognise “healthy” people nor trust myself or others �� it just seems like it’s easier to be alone a never trust anyone

  • Somebody please answer me. So my parents whenever I get in trouble spank me and then when I bring it up, they say it’s all in my head and that I’m lying and they always interrupt me and say that I am lying. Is that gaslighting?

  • Yeah, my mom loves deflecting. Whenever we have a dialogue about some issue, I say something and she immediately latches on to a specific word and spins the dialogue somewhere else, attacking me in the process. I always return to the topic I want to discuss and it just happens again. At some point, when I bring her attention to the fact she is deflecting, she gets insanely angry. I always end the dialogue feeling empty and frustrated… and feeling that the dialogue was pointless.

  • My ex girlfriend always made me feel bad at the end of arguments, but she also told me everything would be okay and that she would love me no matter what, telling me to just never question her again and to always trust her. So she both shrunk my self worth and made me more emotionally dependent on her, it’s a much less obvious form of gaslighting disguised as a sweet and healthy compromise…

  • I watched and listened to maybe 3 or 4 minutes of this doctor… and In my opinion… she’s practicing “Gaslighting” people into to believing her because she’s the one with the degree in psychology.

  • My dad said that I’m being stupid, and then said “I said you were being stupid not that you are stupid big fucking difference” is this gaslighting?

  • Is it possible to have these characteristics but unrelated to someone gas-lighting? That is: 1) second guessing oneself 2) protective of partner/possible abuser 3) lacking confidence 4) struggling to make decisions 5) thinking one cannot do anything right

  • “How to know if you’ve been gaslighted”, and I go check, check, check, check, check. I could think carefully about why something my mother did was wrong and plan out how to explain why something hurt me, and she would find ways to reply that made me forget what my point was, and that made me feel confused and stupid. Like she punctured me, and my thoughts and feelings and confidense trickled out at the bottom. And my whole family was trained into feeling sorry for her, because she was having a hard time, she was depressed, she had been abused as a child, so we all needed to be extra considerate of her.

  • I finished the video fully! I have been gaslighted multiple times but I know let it ruffle my feathers down! I am strong. I am forceful! I am a force to be reckoned with! I am a badass

  • I was in an abusive relationship for two years, seeking help gave me the confidence to leave that relationship. Do you have advice on healing after being abused?

  • Who do you reach out to get help? My Ex boyfriend and the community that I live in are trying to gaslight me by following me at jobs, stores, taping me in my home, and car trying to get me to have a mental break down.. Is there anyway I can Sue them and what lawyer can help Me!

  • You have just described my brother and how i feel around him and only now have i understood why the feelings i have had within me and why i feel the way i do all these years,i am 59

  • What is gaslighting?

    A word those with serious victim mentalities use to accuse someone who’s actually telling the truth, because they don’t want to accept responsibility.

  • My ex best friend has all of the ten signs, it just wow, I didn’t realize that, I literally feel like I was insane, and know that it was toxic so I stop talking to her, like one month ago and I feel so much relieved, and I am fine again, and in peace

  • OUR LOVE ���� SUPPORT,HELP, FINANCIAL AID AND LEGAL ADVOCATES ⚖️������������ JUSTICE ANGELS ���� SAYS ��️�� XOXOXO LOVE YOU ����❤️ FOR PROVIDED INFORMATION IN THIS AND ALL VIDEOS WE’VE SENT TO ALL THE ST.LOUIS,MO,USA LAW ENFORCEMENT INVESTIGATION TEAMS AGENTS PEOPLE OFFICER’S AGENTS, PEOPLE IN AND OUT OF (***::::: ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS NA, GA, CA, SCA, AL-ANON, OA, HA, CMA, ACA, AL-ANON, OXFORD HOUSES,HARRIS HOUSES, TREATMENT CENTERS,EARLY DUCKS ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS MEETING’S ALL FACILITIES NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS MEETINGS FACILITIES AND GROUPS TOO….. PREDATORS NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS CHILD ABUSERS ANIMAL ABUSERS ���� ELDER ABUSERS BULLYS AND ABUSERS TOWARDS DISABLED WHITE GAY FEMALE DISABLED PEOPLE WILL BE (***HELD ACCOUNTABLE IN THE COURTS***)!!!! LIKE JEFFERY EPSTEIN****(& GHISLAINE MAXWELL BOTH GOT CAUGHT RAPING CHILDREN,AND SO WE KNOW….. EXPOSING PREDATORS ABUSERS IS THE BEST METHOD OF JUSTICE ��������������������������������������������⚖️���� ���������� SHINING BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOND ������❤️❤️☺️���� IN THE SKY WE PERSONALLY THANK,(***DR.RAMANI AND SUPER #1 DIVORCE LAWYER REBECCA ZUNG AND LEGAL ADVOCATES ⚖️������������ JUSTICE ANGELS ���� SAYS THANKS FOR THE VIDEOS ����️ GOD �� LOVES YOU AND SO DO ALL SEXY ASS DJ’S VJS BLOGGERS VLOGGERS YOUTUBERS HERE SHOWING LOVE NOW.!!!9)7)2020

  • I know I’m being gaslighted by my partner and in Kahoots with my brother in law still hoping she will change seems to get cheap thrills from it

  • I am a Author, Writer, I have written to ENCOURAGE, and INSPIRE others.

    I have written Poetry, articles, I am a Author,
    I have written many articles, to AVERT, Prevent, the violence harm of others.

    I am no different than any other man, or woman, who dislikes harm to others.

    I am No different than any other man or woman who dislikes harm women, and children, or men.

    I am No different than any other Author, Writer, Poet, and those who work in professions of Service, Protective Service, First Responders, and wishes write to protect women, and men, and children.

    I am No different than any other, Writer, Author, Poet, or first responder, public Safety personal, who spends their time and efforts to help others.

    I am No different other than the actual fact, that, I have had actual real, direct, person to person face to face threats from persons in, have been in positions of authority these actual threats to make my life difficult.

    I write in many times to prevent harm, and avert harm beforehand.

    This way others can make choices to help prevent, and prepare people to prevent any potential harm.

    I am NOT a person who would harm anyone else, I am just as any other first responder who wish is Provide protection, Safety, Well being.

    I like people, this why I write to ENCOURAGE and help others, in many ways, throughout my life.

    There are many people throughout our history who have a innate sense to help others.
    I innate sense to Prevent harm.

    I have innate sense to Protect agaist the violence, hurt, and harm of women, children and men.

    These people were allowed to help others in our history.

    I am not trying to be great,

    I am just trying to live with the innate sense to help others, in whatever positive ways I can.

    I have only desired to help others since I was at a very young age.

    Not everyone likes the idea that I wish to help others.

    I have been told why should you Care about others.

    I would never try to hurt anyone.

    I am Protective person who desires to help others.

    There is a reason why I have repeated this information NOT difficult to figure out why.

    WHY HAVE I WRITTEN REPEATEDLY, THE REASON IS VERY OBVIOUS, their are those who wish to Slander, lie, create situations, and or deliberately lie to cause problems.

    Note from May 25, 2018, 1:15 PM[Blue]
    Note from May 16, 2018, 2:52 PM[Blue]

    I Jason Sandifer, Have Prayed Concerning the following Written below has been previously in various media formats in similar version this is a Reposted.

    I still believe that there has been a Very intense Concerted Efforts to make myself Appear, and be Depicted in a very Negative light, via exploitation of Situational Circumstances in some circumstances in which I am NOT in control of.

    This may be a Direct Result of several prior (Actual) (Direct Threats) (Verbal)

    (Actual Face to Face conversations) stated to make my Life Very hard, and difficult for me, via some Persons of, and in Authority, and maybe a direct retaliation, and as to Exploit any occurrences of Homelessness, or Situational circumstances, hardships, difficulties, including any loss of employment, layoff, and or any occurrences of unemployment.

    *For a Very literal Example it was stated to me Face to face, (Actually) told to me (Directly) that I looked like I belonged in a cage, like an orangutan, and the person had the ability to ( “make this happen quite easily”).

    *This only just one of many such like Threats I have received Directly via persons of, or in Positions of Authority thru the years. I have done absolutely Nothing Wrong.

    *Yet precarious situations come to me. (Randomly) Not the other way around.

    I DO NOT have any medical issues I am healthy.

    I am NOT on any medications, NOR have I ever been on a regimented prescription medication schedule, I have Never, Ever been on a regimented prescription program other than antibiotics for a cut 15 years ago or so.

    I Do Not Seek Trouble at All. Yet by some, I have been many times Treated like a Criminal (repeatedly).

    (I have) also been
    HIGHLY CONCERNED
    for Family, Friends, and Acquaintances, for
    their Well-Being and Safety.

    In Everything that I Write, Wrote, and have Written, or Speak about it has been to Encourage, and or Help, and or to be of Service to someone else.

    I have moved on, and will continue with Pursuing with My Hopes and Dreams, despite the many precarious situations, situational circumstances, and also (MANY, MANY DIFFICULTIES) which I have faced.

    Although this has been a Serious Threat and Issue.

    I have also been (Highly Concerned for Family, Friends, many Acquaintances), (for their Well Being, Safety and Protection)

    Author, Advocate for Humanity,
    Jason Sandifer-(Advocate for the Preservation of Life), (and for
    Humanity).
    Advocate, Reposted Messages Michigan-(2020)
    5/7/2020
    Reposted
    6/23/2020, 7/8/2020
    6/17/2020
    6/12/2020
    6/5/2020
    5/9/2020,
    8/22/2020

  • I’m not perfect I know this……however, yes been put down since I was young sibling, childhood friends (Friend), some relationships yes, certain Family members yes, coworkers yes, supervisors yes.

  • I think this just happened to me with my very best friend who warned me not to go around this woman named Liz cuz she was a meth addict and she was talking about me she made me promise I wouldn’t go over there and what happened a couple of weeks later I went around the corner for a walk and she was standing there talking to Liz even though Liz took advantage of her before by borrowing $1,800 and I’ll be paying back 411 though she didn’t want me to go around there after a whole year of knowing this woman who pleaded with me every day to trust her cuz she would never deceive me she lied to me. Then after she lied to me she tried to say to me I was the one that misunderstood. Is that gaslighting??�� Then I start to feel like it’s my fault �� what I really do take on the responsibility of making everybody happy around me and then when I get home I realize that I was never fulfilled in that I was never happy they feel better for having known me and seen me and been with me but I go home and I become lonely I crashed just like an airplane raid headed for the ground I smack right and I’m like what did I do wrong why can’t I find fulfillment in this life why can’t I be happy why won’t people let me be happy the minute I get happy it doesn’t matter if I don’t make me feel guilty. how the frig do we find happiness in America when everybody is trying to make us unhappy they’re trying to put us all in a cage and tell us we can’t talk free and we can express ourselves and we just wind up all feeling angry at everybody around us

  • They torture you mentaly and then they act sweet:oh why are you so shy,why you don’t have friends,you want to be an old wanker with no wife and kids?It is funny how it is not easy to be without parents but it is not easy to have one either!

  • I need help pleasr. My 17 year old daughter has been alienated by her manipulating narcissistic morger. I will miss my daughter if I need ro but I worry gor her future.

  • God has answered my prayer for clarity and will execute justice for me. This confirms my adult daughter has been gaslighting me since she was a preteen. I will let this go and only allow good people in my life. Time for me (and for her) to find a new family. Cheers!

  • It would be helpful if you defined what gaslighting is. You identified behaviors used to gaslight but I still don’t know what gaslighting is.

  • I got out by her placing false charges of domestic abuse against me and taking my son from me. Now he is self-soothing at 8 months old. His brain hasn’t developed emotional regulation. I put him to be every night, no matter how long it took. I got up when he got up. Please send prayers.

  • I have an aunt that does this. Making me out to be promiscuous. & Saying no man that’s been interested in me really like me & he was going around talking about me in a negative manner. I distanced myself away from her.

  • one thing he would do was harm himself and show me (like scratch marks) and uncontrollably cry on the call when I was upset by something he did to me, he would also tell me that he would kill himself if I broke up with him

  • I’m going through this right now. I find myself recording conversations because that person makes me feel like I’m lying when I know I’m right but some how I end up being wrong but I would love to know how to deal with it

  • When the person is a mental health professional and they tell you all that is wrong with you, you begin to doubt yourself. When you are told you are emotionally unstable, despite you becoming distressed only sporadically and only ever with that person and no other, you start believing them. They know what they are talking about right? They tell you what you are thinking and feeling even when you know that’s not the case. They will insist until you give in just so that they will stop getting at you. You say yes because that’s what they want to hear but really it’s a no. It’s soul destroying. And when things seem to go well with that person you are always second guessing yourself. It’s going to good. You wait for them to take umbrage at something you said or did and the cycle repeats itself.

  • Most of things you mentioned didn’t really describe me. But the last one did. In my marriage I feel like everything is my responsibility and everything is my fault. It feels like my wife is always unhappy with me no matter how much I do. I work 6 days a week I come home pick up the house, do the laundry, the dishes, mow the yard takeout the trash. She never acknowledges how hard I work but will complain we never do anything together. I’ll make plans for the weekend for us to go to a party and she derails it and says she doesn’t want to go that she would rather go out with her girlfriend, then continues to complain that we never do anything. We have a 2 year old and I’ll suggest we bring him with us. She’ll say no he’ll be a handful and we won’t have fun. She shoots down every idea I come up with and then turns around and complains

  • Since I discovered gaslighting about 10 years ago, I see it everywhere. Friends, family, bosses, coworkers.
    It takes time to discover gaslighters as they use charm to suck you into their circle.
    I’ve noticed that these people have a lot of “aquantences” but they have no close friends.

  • This can be done with anonymity and by a group or organization? How is it different from mobbing? Generally what is the perpetrators motive? Can this cause PTSD?

  • 1 major sign of a victim mentality: You unconditionally believe something you hear to be “gaslighting” because you don’t want to accept that the so-called “gaslighter” is actually telling the truth (as is the case 90% of the time), because you don’t want to accept responsibility for the damage you’ve done, unconsciously or otherwise.

  • One thing that helped me as someone who has been gaslighted is to write a letter to the person who gaslighted you and explain how they made you feel. It helped me to realize on my own just how many signs there were that the person was abusing me with this and that I wasn’t insane for feeling oppressed by them:). Also, since I don’t plan on seeing that person again and I have the power to stay away from them, it feels nice to write to them and never send it because it feels like I have more control over the situation/I have the last word.

  • I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls, i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, i decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( [email protected] ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location, WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone…even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( [email protected] )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467…thank me later.

  • This is how my life looks like the past 8 years. The only problem is that even though I understand he is gaslighting me I doubt myself and believe him I’m crazy and need medication

  • . My mother would criticize how I looked and was verbally abusive. She said us kids ruined her life, even when she was old. I finally said, “Well, you shouldn’t have spread your legs, then.” I’ve got a cousin who also tries to make me feel stupid. She asked, “Do you know what this word means?” I replied, “yes” and told her the meaning and she shut up. She also criticizes me. The best advice I can give is to stay away, whether they are family or not

  • I quit my job 3 days ago as my boss, during her English lesson with me, talked about her the other nanny, who has made my life Hell, constantly tries to get me in trouble. When I confronted the nanny with it she told my boss I had verbally attacked her. My boss denied fully of what she’d told me and even told me today I’m giving up at work. More gaslighting. I’ve made the right decision.

  • Everytime,I mad or started to argue with my boyfriend end up i’m the one being insane and apologize. I always feel it’s all my fault at the end. He will reject all my calls, and say I treat him bad, and made him feel he is a bad guy. and told me he has been treated way better before. And tell me I don’t know how to be a girlfriend. I like him a lot. Sometimes, I want to get attention and nagged him, and he’ll say: what’s ur problems? It makes me feel I’m so wrong all the time. It’s like he is the one who keeps forgive me, and being patient with me. 
    I know I’m paranoid, impatient sometimes. I don’t know, it justs seems all my fault.

    I’m just mentally tired. and get hurt so much.

  • I didn’t realize how toxic and how widespread the abuse was… and that this has been going on my entire life. Time to start digging myself out

  • Let’s drop the gaslighting term.
    Narcissists psychologically manipulate
    other people to destroy them.
    This will be your criminal defense, my friends.
    Use it in good health.

  • Like with many on here, I didn’t realise I was being gaslighted by colleagues at work until I saw examples of it from this video I could identify with. I had never heard of the term and the main gaslighter recruited individuals to help her discredit me. Sadly my employer has been taken in by her lies and I am the one who is facing a disciplinary hearing where I could be dismissed as the victim. On top of this, the girl who unwittingly helped me 3 years ago to take away my suicidal thoughts, also believed the gaslighter as they are friends and she stopped talking to me and reported me. It appears my employer has no understanding of this form of manipulation.

  • My mother gaslit the hell out of me growing up. I don’t think she knew what she was doing, but It’s been hard as hell to repair it. It’s so damaging.

  • Subscribed. I’ve been away from my toxic narc but I still watch these videos for a reality check. You are spot on in every detail. Seems they all behave exactly the same way with the same agenda. Still hard to believe I allowed myself to stay with her for 26 years.

  • i,m living with my dad who is a healthy 81 years old man who beaten me up several times through several years in my childhood and i truthfully never really recovered from that…He was beating my older brother also who terrorized me and threatened to kill me at so many times, probably because of what my father was doing to him too. From outside we were looking like the perfect family but behind closed doors..it was a climate of terror…which had several impacts on my health both physically and mentally… I didn,t wait for him to die to confront him about his violence towards me…
    He says he beaten me one time and that i suffer from hypersensitivity and delusion…i get so mad and out of control and abusive verbally myself…Its time i leave and move on from him and my brothers.. I will never have an apology or recognition for what he did to me…he tells
    other people he knows, about me being over sensitive and that he has a paranoid child.
    So i guess this is what you called GASLIGHTING hey!
    the worst is that he is so charismatic and very well informed man…
    I,m moving in one month…Now i beleive its time for me to create myself a real loving family
    where i can fell aprreciated!
    I want to thank you for your vid! that was very informal!

  • Appreciate your effort; I’d have been more able to focus on the message if this distraction wasn’t there: your blinking moved the hair strand hanging on it thanks for correcting it mid-vid.

  • Many become “sick” when gas lighted to point they have to seek mental health care. Those in abusive relationships that are highly controlling can even convince you to submit to procedures such as ECT or electroshock. Following this procedure as it inflicts traumatic brain injury in their outcomes, patients become docile, apathetic, have memory loss for marital issues that led to admission, more compliant and controllable. Given their neurocognitive issues gas lighting becomes more intense experience for them and reality checks more difficult. Please see videos under you tube heading of ectjustice so you can inform yourselves and others of this greatly increased practice taking place at leading facilities. When you learn the truth of this I hope you will warn others on public social to what you have learned.

  • Aggressive codependents out there can be gaslighters. “You have a problem, so you have to listen to me! I have the solution to fix it and I’m not going to leave you alone until you work with me to fix your problem (that was none of my business) in the way I see fit! If you don’t, I’ll keep pestering you until you do things my way!”

  • As a Social Psychologist I can’t help but think you are simply describing an insecure, passive and slightly manic, paranoid person who victimizes themselves. You are describing a personality disorder developed via Parental manipulation and control not from only one encounter.

  • I just now realize how a friend I had was gaslighting me since we became friends. She would always make me feel like I needed her to survive, that she was doing me a favor to hangout with me and invite me to parties and other stuff.

    The walking on eggshells thing was the biggest red flag I saw too late. The worst part is when you are brought to the point you are confronted with “I think you are narcissistic” or “Do you even care about me?” when you know you spend your time, energy and even money for that person who always half thanks you.

    I think other people may have gaslit me in the past but this last friendship is the most recent thing to me. I always felt like something was off, something was draining me and my energy but I never knew why. I think it was her gaslighting me and I was manipulated to feel below her and that I had to rely on her for everything because I was just not good enough. I was too “privileged”, too “childish”, not experienced enough with friendship and “emotionally broken” by her standards and these adjectives were reinforced by everyone around, even my family who excused her actions with a “be more understanding of her she has a tougher life than yours she had been through more”.

    Manipulative people don’t manipulate one person, they can warp reality around them to secure the manipulation around their targets. Manipulation is more effective when the people around can further the manipulation for you without realizing.

  • This makes me sad because I still don’t know what to do. I’ve walked away and literally just received a message from her saying that I’m a quitter in our relationship who doesn’t fight for her. 4 years. Honestly should’ve ended 1-2 years ago. But we tried. Oh well.

  • I have found the following article quite helpful from the words and vocabulary bringing power and freedom: “35 Signs You’re in a Toxic Relationship” https://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/35-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-business-relationship.html

    and I think it’s all round relationships not just business

  • Amen darling. I can’t manipulate. No matter the abuse. No excuses for serial killers, abusers. I don’t do that. But been murdered spiritually

  • Now i know what’s going on with this terrible person i have taken a stand and now i gaslight them back. My last two bosses or what i like to call them narcissists. After you figure it out then it just makes you mad and i give it back to them…..remember IT’S JUST A JOB not your life.

  • Um did I miss the definition and examples of gaslighting? Those 9 signs were all good but im left with more questions than the one i came in with. What is gaslighting? Sigh

  • That’s how they make me feel and that’s how my family treats me I pay for everything and they pay for nothing my daughter buys most of the food to feed her kids and grandkid but I buy food too and in pay all bills everytime I get on to the kids for something because their mom lets them get away with it and they have no respect for me or anyone….they use to not treat me like this until they went to live with their dad and now their mom is back in their lives and they live with me with their mom……things are so wrong there’s system that is wrong with this family system

  • Guess I thought this was going to be about how to know that this is happening to you. Mostly it seems to be about how damaged YOU are that you allow it. YOU feel weak. YOU feel insecure. Wait a minute, isn’t that gaslighting? Telling people something’s wrong with them and that’s why it’s happening?

  • Thanks for your comments here. When my narcissist live in mother in law started in on me, gaslighting me and using her other witchcraft skills It did not change my thoughts about me but I felt hopeless since my wife was being controlled by her. 7 years later it’s still the same deal. Marriage is basically over but we have a house to pay for and my daughters very large college loan. First of all I believe in God’s plan for my life and I know one day complete deliverance will come. I go to church with my childhood friends and their wife’s and I have coffee time and meet for lunch with my friends all the time. My wife can decide to come along any time, but she must obey the narc. That’s okay. I live my life and take care of my responsibilities. I forgive everyone everyday. They are the empty ones.

  • Gaslighters, narcissistic, those people are the worst to be around, and they will do it again and again and again. Even when you down they will make you go to the gutter naked. Try and get away from them as quickly as possible. Stay safe.

  • my wife is this type of abuser and does all of this steps so i played this video everyday loud and she become less abusive. She hasn’t stop yet, but we are in a good way

  • Great video, thank you so much for the information. After watching it I feel half the people I work with are gaslighting me, including a couple of managers. Now that I’m more aware of what’s going on I’m going to take steps to stop it or at least bring it to the attention of upper management.

  • Holy. Crap. FAMILY/ My PAST OFFICE MGR & A few. Coworkers, i can all name! Its so ugly & hurtful…..& they ALWAYZ get away with IT!
    Thank you for this very useful. Info!!

  • I have dealt with these types of people a long time because they stole intellectual property from me. Now, I just refuse to do those things anymore. I can listen to their lies and they are just that. They do not work on me, I know the truth.

  • when ever i tell my fiance how i feel and what we could do to fix things, he accuses me of threatning to leave, i said i dont want to but if this keeps going on i might have to leave its toxic…

  • So what would you say to two individuals who grew up in emotionally manipulative / abusive homes and now they are each other’s significant other, and each of them feels like they are being gaslit by the other?

  • A reviewer below mentioned people playing games, which reminded me of the book from the 70s (I think): Games People Play and also, by a different author, same period: I’m Okay, You’re Okay. It’s helpful to study the actual games that people play so we know what we’re seeing. But the best of all is to listen to all of Dr. Ramani’s videos AND read that book. And of course, read Dr. Ramani’s new book, too!!!

  • My dad is very abusive and was more abusive when I was a child and hurt me mentally and physically and when I talk about it w my mom
    She says she never saw him hot us but she definately did and she’s like no he didn’t.
    But he did, I never thought my mom would be gaslighting me ��

  • I’m a Survivor!!! I educated myself on gaslighting, narcissistic abuse, Cluster B Disorders, Trauma/Recovery and codependency. Of Course I’m in therapy too! Lol I now see gaslighting coming a mile away and I don’t react when I’m in a situation, for example when I’m at work, when I have to engage with a toxic person.

  • My abuser had me think that I was delusional because I thought that he was changing things in our house. I admitted myself into the psych hospital. They put me on antipsychotics which did nothing as I wasn’t psychotic. He had me admit myself a second time in Xmas Eve for the same reason. This time he wanted me locked up in the Looney bin so he could spend the holiday with his new supply. Still getting out. I have been discarded.

  • These people are notorious for imagined scenarios.. ones that have there own beginning middle and end.. it’s kinna scary cuz they can literally try and say Anything..and if your weak minded enough, it can make you forget the Actual truth….run fast and don’t stop ✨��️

  • oh yes my narc over the years threw pretty much every single one of these types of gas lighting at me. Some more often by far than others….and I spent years always depressed, anxiety filled, confused, trying to always figure out what was going on…as the years went by I would often wonder who I even was at times and the worst of it was I had lost being close with my own family because of my narc wife who had managed to drive wedges between me and much of my immediate family over the fact when they would call her out on her actions in how she treated me or have disagreements with her about anything…suddenly I got hit with the I was her husband and if I loved my wife I would not allow her to be treated that way by her family and so on I had no friends anymore because of the fact she had made sure little by little since she met me that my life revolved totally around only her and even my own daughter when I had her on weekends was a problem to my narc for our marriage….my daughter was the only person I would put before my narc wife always without a second thought even if I knew my narc wife would throw a fit like if my daughters mother called said she had say a open house at school on a certain night if I wanted to go meet her teacher so on…..my narc wife would have this big fit in a situation like that because she would always have wanted us to do something that funny she never mentioned until I was planning to do something for or with my daughter. My daughter took attention away from my narc wife and I get that now as I understand how narc’s are now. But oh my narc wife could use anything and everything to throw at me to gaslight me. Keep me hurting keep me confused and always keep me worrying it was only a matter of time before she walked out of my life again…..you know what is funny now….even though it still hurts often…after a decade of her in my life and 7 years of marriage….what is funny is often now I wonder why I even cared if she left again. I mean yeah I didnt know she was a narc and I loved my wife….but still why did I care if she left because he always came back and even if she hadn’t came back why did I care…..I look back now and I know without a doubt that I never dated anyone before her that treated me so badly always. I look back and think hell I broke up with people I dated years ago over much less things by far than the hell on earth my narc put me through and yet I married my narc and the day I married her I actually felt like that marrying her was going to change how she was because that is what she told me…that if I married her showed her I really loved her enough to make her my wife that we wouldnt be having these problems anymore….but yet the problems we had dating only got worse and worse and magnified once we were married. Because once we married….she would point to the marriage certificate that she had in a frame in a hutch in the living room and she would say that paper right there says that I was her husband and that meant she owned me and that by God I was hers and she could say or do whatever she wanted I still belonged to her. Im the fool…..I stayed and took her back so long so many years all because I really believed and know I believed it now….I believed what my narc told me…no matter what she did or how hurt I was….she always had a reason it was my fault and she always was not happy because I wasn’t this or that and in the end I wasnt a good enough husband. I spent years trying to be a better husband. My narc wife spent years trying to do everything she could to get out of being a real wife except when she wanted me to do something for her

  • Hello jess my name is stella been binge watching your videos they r helping me so much..I have been gaslighted..the narc discarded me and he added a beautiful friend of mine on fb she lives 3 hrs away he sent a photo of himself asked for a chance to meet her..she asked me what do I say she played along until he figured out she was my friend he then attacked her called her bad names to me like trash he denied saying he wanted to meet her and he said I was set up..i knew she was ur friend so i played along shes a fat bitch etc…i sent him screenshots so he couldnt lie…i was def gaslighed he also called me crazy a liar a cheater…it does mess with your head thank u again for ur amazing videos I love them ❤

  • Ask me this: How is it gaslighting when what they’re saying is actually true but you keep making excuses and refusing to accept it?

  • If you love them you have a problem it’s easy to leave someone you don’t love I love my narc I knew she was crazy I ignored all the red flags I pitied her but in the end the relationship ended it wasn’t much of a relationship but whatever we had ended I think of her often what could have been she was a very beautiful appealing sexy woman she was nearly 70 years old still very beautiful I just could not wrap my head around her issues in her circumstances a damn crying shame in was I don’t think I can ever stop loving her okay you had to be there

  • about a month ago i broke off the friendship i had with the person that made me feel alll of these things and at first i felt really horrible about it because i cut things off very suddenly, but at the same time she had put me in this mindset that i’m just worthless and though she never said it, everything that i went out of my way to do for her was still never enough. i started to realize that now she’s gone i can finally breathe, but i’m angry again. angry at her and all the bullshit she pulled on her girlfriend and i and i have a thousand more things to say to her. i hate that i think about all of it so much. i think it’ll be a while until i let myself get that close to someone. i don’t have many friends and i don’t miss her but i miss the roll she played in my life. i feel a bit empty. even though i still have good people in my life there’s still a hole and it’s just filled with anger and sadness man idk how to get over it. i sound so cheesy. many people have it way worse that me and if you even need someone to talk to please just reply to this and i got you whenever you need me

  • I really don’t like how people especially doctors but anyone says people with mental illness have faulty thinking, feelings etc I can promise you that if you went through what they had you’d think and feel the same way. I think people that tells others they are faulty in their thinking or that something is wrong with them have the problem. We are not normal I’ve heard many people including doctors say. Normal being based on the average person. What exactly is normal anyway? How the majority thinks or feels or reacts to things? Who’s to say that we are the normal ones and the rest of you aren’t? I am not speaking out of anger or trying to attack anyone just giving a honest opinion and asking honest questions or giving suggestions. I’m not saying that nothing is wrong but it makes us no less human than anyone else. In fact I think it makes us more human because we’ve experienced more in life and it makes us more understanding and willing to learn about others, to be more compassionate.

  • I’m 52 my mother has gaslight my whole life psychopath kill my 2 labs.
    Got involved with a sociopath ruined my life had to go back with my mother teachers get continually abused bye the narcissistic sociopath psychopath I have only learned about this 2 years ago.
    Now I’m hyper-vigilant and it seems to be narcissist every single person I talked to and every single person around me has these overwhelming traits I’m trying to date on the Internet it’s insanity I really feel totally crazy like the entire world is nothing but narcissists

  • All I could think about during this video… Was how awesome Chevron Super Supreme gasoline was back in the 80s and 90s. You could smell it 5 feet from your vehicle. Great stuff. But ya gas lighting= bad. The thing is we are all guilty of it to some level. People are scum. Just remind them they are acting like scum and dont fall into it….duh.

  • Yeh bing watching your stuff today.

    In regards to my experience with this I became like a detective ��

    I was confused, baffled exactly like you say.

    I was put in the dog house when he badly let me down when he didn’t follow through with an arrangement we had made.

    He turned it around on me and punished me by ghosting me for a week then when I didn’t chase he crawled back claiming his friend died!!!!!

    Wtf what so you can’t share this with the person your supposed to be in love / close with.

    Aw wow I’m glad he’s with someone else now poor soul, she is probably high as a kite on him his love bombing is epic.

  • I was with a narrisis I was gonna move 3 weeks ago and this guy has me go to move out to Vegas and I flew there 3 times to see him and he wanted me to find a place so I did it was set that we move in November he continued to hound me about moving and finally when the house was ready I started to pack and got him a plane tickets to come here and drive me to our new place when the time cause he change on me and said he can’t move with me cause I accuse him and call him a liar and cheater he used that against me well soon as he broke it off with me he found someone else really In 3 weeks never wanted me to kno anything I ask questions and he was like what up with all the questions. He was supposly going threw a divorce I wanted to kno this before I left to move there he Isolated me from my friends he didn’t want me to listen to nobody try to have control and now that I watch these videos I really see who he is he’s gonna do it to this next person he’s with use her for a place to live and it take care him a 51-year-old man don’t have a job had his ex-wife paying for his rent his storage his telephone bill and now that she ain’t gonna do that no more he blames it on me when he’s the one that was fucking around. But now he got this new gf he wants to keep me around for what? In case this don’t work out he hurt me by telling me what he and his new friend are doing throw it in my face just wrong hope karma get him and it will he’s sick in his mind he Manipulates everything and people believe him I almost started to believe him but in my deep gut I knew something wasn’t right

  • I think I’m dealing or dealt with gaslighting at its finest I caught my ex Narc having an affair of course he denied it says she doesn’t exist after I saw what I saw he actually offered to get a lie detectors‘s test and we did it and he actually passed I kept seeing ridiculous stuff on his phone even after the test so I kept bringing it up finally he ended up writing her husband on Facebook saying that she gave him what he wanted out of a relationship Which was sex praise and admiration and when her husband sent it to me he said that I did it he still till this day looks me dead in the face and says that I wrote that letter I also caught him writing his ex-girlfriend saying that he needed a friend to talk to asking her how she was doing and when I saw that message he also said that I wrote that too and again still till this day looks me in the face and is so sure that I wrote it I don’t understand how someone could be so in denial and it’s a complete mind fuck for me every time I look at the letter I really can’t believe what I read and how he has the nerve to keep telling me I did it I moved out with our two-year-old daughter trying to stay no contact but he just wants to act like nothing ever happened and I am the one that caused all of this and wrote those letters it’s been a very strange journey that’s for sure!

  • Another good video. I do not think or am not sure I was at all trauma bonded to him. I know this second narc that tried to latch onto me I had absolutely no bond to him at all. I actualy just wished he would quit coming by. He got to be a pest.

  • The abuse got so bad that I left the city where I lived, cut off all contact, and called the police and filed charges. I have a PFA hearing in a week. I won back contol over my life by letting the police hold him accountable for his abusive actions. He did most of these things to me. I had never actaully heard of the term gaslighting until him. He called his ex-girlfriend a gaslighter. Go figure.

  • I’m still figuring out what happened. It’s been five months since I left after three months of devaluing. As the time passes by I see more and more. So painful.

  • I’m my own expert with my own experience. Great video until it was recommended to go to couples counseling. The types who gaslight only use therapy as another weapon. It’s probably better for the person being gaslit to have their own therapist… one who understands these types because many do not. In my experience and opinion.

  • If you watch the news, watch TV,, any commercial advertising,,
    Buy news paper,, but coffee,, buy food,, buy water,, buy fitness, buy health, if you went to school,, pay tax, pay fines,, ect
    You are in a controlled society,,
    You have been gas lit,,,,
    Don’t blame your friends and family or past relationships,,,
    Don’t blame your self,,,,
    We have all been fooled:)
    Change your world
    Wake the f up!!!

  • I don’t know still if I’m getting gaslighted, I feel all these steps are happening to me but I also feel like I might just be crazy when I’m upset or just feel like I’m wrong or I’m making this up

  • I swear my cat is gaslighting me. He miaus and miaus and acts like his bowl is empty. I look and see plenty of food. He insists there is no food, but I totally see food. WTF, man?!

  • Person: (attempting to discuss the issue)
    Narc: When?
    Person: (answers question of recent occurrence)
    Narc: You’re making a mountain out of a molehill.
    Person: No, this is the latest of a pattern of behaviour I’m noticing.
    Narc: When?
    Person: (X, Y and Z occasions)
    Narc: Why are you raking up the past? Get over it!

  • Now I know how to avoid people noticing I’m gaslighting them, thanks. I’m gonna dumb this bitch who is completely emotionally dependent on me because I was only using her to get close to her friends, and they’ll all take my side.

  • Parents can also do this. I was gaslighted all my life by mother and an ex wife. Neither affects me now thanks to learning about narcissistic personality disorder and CPTSD.

  • you guys, my brother does this all the time. Although I don’t know why he would if he is only 9. I don’t get it. I’m probably exaggerating. But every argument we have consists of him gaslighting me.

  • I am a Author, Writer, I have written to ENCOURAGE, and INSPIRE others.

    I have written Poetry, articles, I am a Author,
    I have written many articles, to AVERT, Prevent, the violence harm of others.

    I am no different than any other man, or woman, who dislikes harm to others.

    I am No different than any other man or woman who dislikes harm women, and children, or men.

    I am No different than any other Author, Writer, Poet, and those who work in professions of Service, Protective Service, First Responders, and wishes write to protect women, and men, and children.

    I am No different than any other, Writer, Author, Poet, or first responder, public Safety personal, who spends their time and efforts to help others.

    I am No different other than the actual fact, that, I have had actual real, direct, person to person face to face threats from persons in, have been in positions of authority these actual threats to make my life difficult.

    I write in many times to prevent harm, and avert harm beforehand.

    This way others can make choices to help prevent, and prepare people to prevent any potential harm.

    I am NOT a person who would harm anyone else, I am just as any other first responder who wish is Provide protection, Safety, Well being.

    I like people, this why I write to ENCOURAGE and help others, in many ways, throughout my life.

    There are many people throughout our history who have a innate sense to help others.
    I innate sense to Prevent harm.

    I have innate sense to Protect agaist the violence, hurt, and harm of women, children and men.

    These people were allowed to help others in our history.

    I am not trying to be great,

    I am just trying to live with the innate sense to help others, in whatever positive ways I can.

    I have only desired to help others since I was at a very young age.

    Not everyone likes the idea that I wish to help others.

    I have been told why should you Care about others.

    I would never try to hurt anyone.

    I am Protective person who desires to help others.

    There is a reason why I have repeated this information NOT difficult to figure out why.

    WHY HAVE I WRITTEN REPEATEDLY, THE REASON IS VERY OBVIOUS, their are those who wish to Slander, lie, create situations, and or deliberately lie to cause problems.

    Note from May 25, 2018, 1:15 PM[Blue]
    Note from May 16, 2018, 2:52 PM[Blue]

    I Jason Sandifer, Have Prayed Concerning the following Written below has been previously in various media formats in similar version this is a Reposted.

    I still believe that there has been a Very intense Concerted Efforts to make myself Appear, and be Depicted in a very Negative light, via exploitation of Situational Circumstances in some circumstances in which I am NOT in control of.

    This may be a Direct Result of several prior (Actual) (Direct Threats) (Verbal)

    (Actual Face to Face conversations) stated to make my Life Very hard, and difficult for me, via some Persons of, and in Authority, and maybe a direct retaliation, and as to Exploit any occurrences of Homelessness, or Situational circumstances, hardships, difficulties, including any loss of employment, layoff, and or any occurrences of unemployment.

    *For a Very literal Example it was stated to me Face to face, (Actually) told to me (Directly) that I looked like I belonged in a cage, like an orangutan, and the person had the ability to ( “make this happen quite easily”).

    *This only just one of many such like Threats I have received Directly via persons of, or in Positions of Authority thru the years. I have done absolutely Nothing Wrong.

    *Yet precarious situations come to me. (Randomly) Not the other way around.

    I DO NOT have any medical issues I am healthy.

    I am NOT on any medications, NOR have I ever been on a regimented prescription medication schedule, I have Never, Ever been on a regimented prescription program other than antibiotics for a cut 15 years ago or so.

    I Do Not Seek Trouble at All. Yet by some, I have been many times Treated like a Criminal (repeatedly).

    (I have) also been
    HIGHLY CONCERNED
    for Family, Friends, and Acquaintances, for
    their Well-Being and Safety.

    In Everything that I Write, Wrote, and have Written, or Speak about it has been to Encourage, and or Help, and or to be of Service to someone else.

    I have moved on, and will continue with Pursuing with My Hopes and Dreams, despite the many precarious situations, situational circumstances, and also (MANY, MANY DIFFICULTIES) which I have faced.

    Although this has been a Serious Threat and Issue.

    I have also been (Highly Concerned for Family, Friends, many Acquaintances), (for their Well Being, Safety and Protection)

    Author, Advocate for Humanity,
    Jason Sandifer-(Advocate for the Preservation of Life), (and for
    Humanity).
    Advocate, Reposted Messages Michigan-(2020)
    5/7/2020
    Reposted
    6/23/2020, 7/8/2020
    6/17/2020
    6/12/2020
    6/5/2020
    5/9/2020,
    8/22/2020

  • Finally ended my relationship and all this time I thought I was just insecure and oversensitive. �� It’ll take time to heal but I’ll get there.

  • I cannot even work.
    She almost has like munchausen’s by proxy convincing me I’m the mentally ill one I need to be institutionalized my whole life I’ve been fighting against this.
    But you set me up my whole life would refuse me an education so she could always financially abused me and force me to be dependent on her cuz she made me so sick and weak I can’t do anything I have tumors all over my adrenal glands

  • What if we are both doing this to eachother? I know this was my parent’s relationship so I know that I may have picked up some of this stuff but I think that it’s happening to me. am I a psychopath or a freakin brainwashed robot or am I the victim or the abuser. am I losing my mind? my memory and my ability to choose and think logically? I honestly think that I have somehow become my father or my mother. my father was def a psycho and my mom just took it every time. but now I have almost no contact with my family even if they are pretty crazy (mostly my choice (I think)but I am seriously not sure) I literally have no contact with friends anymore but I also think that I have trust issues too so is it because I’m untrusting or because my spouse gives me crap for spending time with them. Either way, I just want to end this. but if I am the abuser like my father, I seriously need to end me or be ended.

  • Them: “We’re sorry but you’re banned”
    Me: “Wait, why?!”
    Them: “You made everyone feel uncomfortable and we gave you so many warnings but you ignored every last one of them.”
    Me: “I did no such thing!”
    Them: “Course you did. Several other people have tried to warn you but you kept ignoring them”
    Me: “What are you talking about, I don’t ever recall ANY warnings at all”
    Them: “That’s because you weren’t paying attention. If you did, none of this would be happening right now. Stop making excuses. You’re banned permanently from this group, and you’re not allowed in this group again. You blew all your chances. Accept it.”
    My brain: BSOD

    How’s that for gaslighting?

  • my mom (grandma) i called my mom grandma because my bio mother died when i was 4. i don’t know if it has anything to do with our zodiac signs or our generation gap or we are just two different people. i am literally trying to find answers every where i go. i have a long version of this comment from another video but i’m afraid that no one will read it. anyways. my mom taught me to shove every emotion i have down. if i’m mad (i have anger issues), if i’m sad (she threated to take me to a therapist, thinking i’m crazy), if i’m a little mad, trying to hide most of my anger so i won’t get criticize for having anger issues (she will tell me i’m having an attitude) if i’m happy. (she would ask me why you so happy? you got a boyfriend). i been throwing hits that i’m gay. she can’t be that dumb. one time when i saw her talking to my gay cousin and not being uncomfortable; i thought she was coming around. so i tried looking at a girl from a store and she was upset, so i just thought of an excuse like, “she is the girl that bully me. that’s why i was looking.” she was born in feb 17 1958 she is a Pisces Aquarius cusp, i was born in sept 18 1993. i’m a virgo-libra. she is from the baby boomer generation. i’m from the millennials. i just want to know what is the problem and how do i fix it. am i the problem? is she the problem? is it nobody’s fault. what?

    also, when i’m scare (she will act like i’m overreacting. like one time when the doctor was going to check my bladder with a tube, i was scare because i knew it was going to hurt. i never done anything like it before. she was like “you need to calm down, they are about to check your blood pressure. you need to get this over with anyway. you need to get it done anyway). when i felt pain from getting my tooth pull. i was screaming out pain and she was like “you had no business acting like that. you are too old. when i got my tooth pull, i just stood there and close my eyes”. the dentist, of course was making jokes at the time, trying to light the mood. he knew that it was hurting me. i tried my best to not jump out of the chair. i was grabbing the arm chair. i’m tired of feeling guilty. this is probably depression talking but I’m just so done with life. my emotion are so mix up, it’s hard to tell what i’m feeling. i just like to sit here and just wait for death. i’m sorry but that is how i’m feeling at the moment.

  • I used to release my anger through venting to my friends. My mom read my texts and said she thought about killing herself because of them. I’ve kept my emotions to myself since then. It’s kinda tiring pretending like everything’s always fine though.

  • Covid 19 is gaslighting by big pharma and the media. Millions will starve to death from the lockdown measures. Our governments are putting us all in debt to the tune of trillions and big pharma is making billions with government funds for a “vaccine” for the COMMON COLD. Coronaviruses are the COMMON COLD. And there is no cure for the common cold.

  • The fact that most narcissists see gaslighting almost like sport should tell you everything you need to know about that person,..not nice!!

  • I honk I am being gaslighted by my mom. But I am too and SOO strong so I do not fall into it as much(I do not question my own sanity even if I am close. I naturally sense somethings up and start to question her) But let me watch the video.

  • I am currently in the situation. Obviously, this video really pointed it out. My issue here isn’t just a particular person. However, they are people all over the places, especially where I spend most of my time. They basically watch every step I make and started to pick/collect anything about me in order to post it to whoever is the recepient. Honestly, it has been going on for over a decade now.

  • I’ve done research and i think my older sister has been emotionally abusing me for years

    Thankfully, she moved out with her husband….

  • “Making you lie” is you gaslighting the supposed abuser.
    “Well what was I supposed to do? You were gonna freak out on me!”
    You’re both manipulative at that point.

  • You know what sucks. There has been times I was so emotionally drained I would just cry on the phone. All she did was act like she cared and after I was done crying she would pretend everything was normal. I can go on and on about how bad she mentally abused me

  • I used to talk to an older man, who seemed perfect in the beginning.. good-looking, generous, caring. We met a few times and he used to show up at my work in a store and have coffee.
    But I started to notice that whenever something negative happened to me, he always seemed to find a reason that I was the problem and I had of course done something that must have lead to this.
    For example: A customer was hitting on me at work and givning very nasty looks and comments, and I made him leave after a while. I brought it up with the man I was seeing, and I remember his stone-cold face when he said ”But you had a tank top that day, one that looked very good on you I must say. You have to understand that things like that will happen when you dress in that way.”
    This was one of many things that felt weird. None of my male friends would talk to me like that..
    But, I continued talking to him. He started to blame me for worse things, like when I feel down for thinking of my childhood trauma, and ex boyfriends that had been abusing me. Everything seemed to me my fault.
    When I had enough, I started to contradict him. I told him how hurt I was by his constant behavior. He answered ”You are thinking too much and worrying too much about small things like this. How can you accuse me for this? Remember everything I’ve done for you!” (he bought me a lot of flowers and even a bicycle)
    He continued: ”You are the one bringing these things up now. Not me. So stop blaming me just because YOU are so hurt by everything!”
    I realized that no matter how many times I tried to talk to him, he would just turn everything against me. After breaking up and blocking his number, he started to show up more often at my work. He stared at me, but wouldn’t say a word. I saw his car multiple times as he followed me wherever I went.
    It all became worse, but that’s another story.
    Stay safe out there y’all..

  • I ghost him. I couldn’t handle it. He broke me down and I knew deep inside that he was wrong b uh t his cruel unkindly words were too much for me. I dissapeared this past Monday July 12, 2020.
    He is also a narcissist. I feel better without him. I feel that literally I can breathe deep. The last time he said horrible things I broke in crying and saying to him I am sorry and he said that is all I wanted you to said hime a hug. That is what he said. I went home and I said to myself I can’t do this. I can’t let him do this to me. So I dissapeared. Ghost him. He deserves it.

  • I feel like this term has come into recent vocabulary recently and it’s used to far to frequently
    1. If you and someone have different interpretations of events the other person isn’t gaslighting you, most arguments or disagreements are from to different interpretations of events

  • You are so funny, because of your humour you fixed me, yes you because you make learning about this stuff so much fun.
    Thank you
    Please keep going and going.

  • My wife, who I’ve been with since we were 16( be 49 next month)cheated on me from 03 to 07 and only stopped because she was caught, she wanted me to stay, begged me not to leave, then 2 years later I became so ill I was bedridden and was in and out of ICU, coma and family called in because they said I wouldn’t make it. 2 years into my illness she stopped being there, oh we lived in same house but till march of 2020 I was just there to pay Bills. She literally wants to bleed me dry emotionally and financially. I’ve never gotten over the affair and I never got an answer as to why. Now I’m better we’ve been working on things, but then I find out she was hiding a coworkers number and some other things. She got busted with a reliable hacker who helped me hack into her iPhone,facebook,Instagram, Whats-App, Text messages, deleted call messages, twitter and email account as far back as 2 years.He’s available 24HOURS. Calls OR Text On WhatsApp +12626837511. Contact him for closure greatermindhacker AT gmail.com…Now I know the truth, she says she’s done. NAture of a Narc!!

    What should i do at this point? Any ideas?

    i don’t know if i still love her after all we’ve been through.

  • Guess I have been gaslighted. I’ve got all of those. I block out those memories. They are hard to deal with.
    I am curious what sociopaths and narcissists are, we use those terms a lot but I don’t know what they really look like.
    All the terms and descriptions seem kind of ethereal compared to real life I guess… hearing these things and then applying them to real life is difficult