The Reason Why You Shouldn t Be considered a Helicopter Mother

 

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Weekly I come across articles written by other moms bashing and criticizing what is known as a “helicopter mom” — the overprotective parent who is too involved, hindering their child’s independence. I have a confession: I’m a helicopter mom. My helicopter might be different than yours, and not all helicopter parenting is the same in my opinion.

Okay, look – let me preface this by saying, I’m really in NO position to be giving anyone parenting advice. Not only have I been a mother for less than 3 years, but I’m only kind of good at it. I keep my kid fed, clothed and relatively happy but everything else is hit or [ ]. For those of you who aren’t sure what helicopter parenting is, no, it’s not when a family takes a helicopter to the Hamptons vs the Jitney. It’s when a (usually) mom “hovers” over their child at the playground or any other location where uninformed spies can pass judgment. “Helicoptering” makes certain busy bodies very agitated.

Helicopter Parenting Makes Parents Miserable A 2012 report in the Journal Of Child And Family Studies (you don’t subscribe?) found that mothers with an “intensive parenting attitude” were more stressed and depressed than mothers who were more laissez-faire. Studies by the American Psychological Association found that children with helicopter parents were less capable of managing their emotions and behavior independently, thus less able to deal with the challenging demands of growing up, attending school, or going to work. Listen, I know you want your independence but if you’re going to try to understand her point of view, this isn’t going to work. And honestly, if you’re going to have a tantrum before you even sit down with her, well, I get why she’s a helicopter mom. You’re immature.

So, if you. The first thing you need to do if you want to stop being a helicopter parent is to relax and accept the fact that you will never be capable of protecting your children from all of the dangers in the world. This may be. Stopping your helicopter parenting doesn’t mean you’re going to give them absolute freedom to do what they want but just enough space for them to fight their own battles and develop their skills and identity.

While this may be difficult for you as a parent, this may involve allowing them to take risks and decide for themselves on certain things. She can’t, mustn’t, shouldn’t reject Mom. Why?

Mom’s psyche can’t handle it. What’s going on hereMom’s insecurity is the central reason for her narcissism. The narcissistic defense is standing guard at the edge of a bottomless pit of mom’s need and feelings of worthlessness. That’s why mom can’t withstand rejection.

As childhood obesity, anxiety, depression and suicide rates continue to grow in the United States, some blame in part a facet of modern life, so-called helicopter parenting. There’s concern that a.

List of related literature:

The helicopter parent is overly protective and thus controlling, wanting to protect the child from any danger and provide ultimate success.

“Burns' Pediatric Primary Care E-Book” by Dawn Lee Garzon Maaks, Nancy Barber Starr, Margaret A. Brady, Nan M. Gaylord, Martha Driessnack, Karen Duderstadt
from Burns’ Pediatric Primary Care E-Book
by Dawn Lee Garzon Maaks, Nancy Barber Starr, et. al.
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2019

Many times when I speak publicly about the independence-dependence dynamic, I get asked about “helicopter parenting.”

“Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up” by Vanessa Lapointe, Dr. Laura Markham
from Discipline Without Damage: How to Get Your Kids to Behave Without Messing Them Up
by Vanessa Lapointe, Dr. Laura Markham
LifeTree Media, 2015

Note: We are not talking about helicopter parents!

“Managing the Millennials: Discover the Core Competencies for Managing Today's Workforce” by Chip Espinoza, Mick Ukleja
from Managing the Millennials: Discover the Core Competencies for Managing Today’s Workforce
by Chip Espinoza, Mick Ukleja
Wiley, 2016

Because I was clearly pregnant it was against the rules for me to be taken with her on the helicopter, something about air pressure making it dangerous.

“The Yorkshire Shepherdess” by Amanda Owen
from The Yorkshire Shepherdess
by Amanda Owen
Pan Macmillan, 2014

They don’t want to be helicopter parents.

“The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like Grown-Ups” by Leonard Sax
from The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like Grown-Ups
by Leonard Sax
Basic Books, 2015

It’s not about becoming a helicopter parent – it’s about being involved, knowing what is going on for them, so you can make the call when it’s obvious that things aren’t going right.

“Stand By Me: Helping Your Teen Through Tough Times: Helping Your Teen Through Tough Times” by John Kirwan, Elliot Bell, Kirsty Louden-Bell
from Stand By Me: Helping Your Teen Through Tough Times: Helping Your Teen Through Tough Times
by John Kirwan, Elliot Bell, Kirsty Louden-Bell
Penguin Random House New Zealand, 2014

I don’t want to be a helicopter parent, doing things for my children that they should be doing for themselves.

“Unschooling To University: Relationships Matter Most in a World Crammed With Content” by Judy L Arnall
from Unschooling To University: Relationships Matter Most in a World Crammed With Content
by Judy L Arnall
Judy Arnall, 2018

There is a difference between being there for your children and being a helicopter parent.

“The Trophy Kids Grow Up: How the Millennial Generation is Shaking Up the Workplace” by Ron Alsop
from The Trophy Kids Grow Up: How the Millennial Generation is Shaking Up the Workplace
by Ron Alsop
Wiley, 2008

I’ve never been the helicopter mom, hovering obsessively over my kids.

“The Naked Mom: A Modern Mom's Fearless Revelations, Savvy Advice, and Soulful Reflections” by Brooke Burke
from The Naked Mom: A Modern Mom’s Fearless Revelations, Savvy Advice, and Soulful Reflections
by Brooke Burke
Penguin Publishing Group, 2011

It is interesting that in Samantha’s helicopter story she is a little girl; perhaps it is difficult to imagine the mother’s role in a helicopter fantasy.

“The Boy Who Would Be a Helicopter” by Vivian Gussin PALEY
from The Boy Who Would Be a Helicopter
by Vivian Gussin PALEY
Harvard University Press, 1991

Oktay Kutluk

Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.

Mail: [email protected]
Telephone: +1 (877) 492-3666

Biography: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/kutluk_oktay/
Bibliography: oktay_bibliography

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  • On our Tumblr, a follower asked about the effects of helicopter parenting. We recognize how important this topic could be because of the harm that a helicopter parent can cause, we decided to release this video a day early. Hope you find this video helpful and share it so that more awareness can be brought to the attention of bad or toxic types of parenting. But of course, there may or may not be right or wrong way of parenting, but we can agreed that some are more harmful than good on some level.

  • My parents have, for my entire life (16 yrs), “protected me”, which basically means denying me the ability to live my own life and experience the world. Yet when I try to confront them, they give me tiny examples of how they do (like being able to text people when I got my first phone at 15), and they make me feel guilty about resenting them. They also (whether intentionally or not) blow off my opinions on their parenting as “every teenager hates their parents” or “every teenager thinks their parents are overprotective” or some BS. That plus they tell me about how I have no right to question their parenting style because I’m too young, or something like that.
    I need to get out of the house, but I have nowhere to go, nowhere that I can be totally free of them without also sacrificing my current life and entire future.

  • So I feel like none of my friends understand my situation, so I wanted to ask you guys?
    I’ve always known my parents were overly strict, but this summer and over the course of COVID it just is getting worse. I can’t talk to them about anything cause they never negotiate, or apologize. That is probably typical for any parent (?) but they keep restricting anything and everything. Can’t go out with friends, but on the rare occasion I’m allowed to, my mom or dad is ALWAYS there. The reason being something completely ridiculous such as “they may have a different lifestyle and we don’t want you exposed to that.” Listen, I grew up thinking all their views and opinions were right, but my best friend taught me to form my own opinion before blindly believing them. That really opened my eyes and now I am so much more open minded in my opinions (accepting all genders, situations, sexualities, religions, etc.) and I really found out a lot about myself. But if I ever say anything contrary to their belief it’s me “believing the insidious lies of modern society” (this is just me talking about feminism btw). On top of any other problems with my family there is alwayyssss yelling/screaming. I was used to it since I was kinda brought up that way but like I realized it wasn’t so normal? I have the same freedoms as when I was 5, and it keeps getting more restricting. I won’t liste everything but I hope you get the idea? I feel like maybe this is why I am such a socially awkward person in general? Idk sorry for this rant, I hope someone can help (if it’s toxic, abusive, or just a normal family)?

  • I have very suffocating parents.. All decisions even the person they want me be with.. They choose even that.. I don’t have a life

  • I have overprotective parents and they also pressurize so much like at an absolute abnormal level that each day I felt that I am gonna burning myself up (burnout you may say )!
    And I am 16 but they still stops me from going outside and be friends with other teens of my age but they don’t allow me!
    Home is nothing but a cage to me and I literally hate my parents for that!
    Felt like I am gonna die one day because of their own personal sake!
    If any parent is seeing this message please don’t be overprotective this type of nature does nothing but harm ur kids and believe me if kids also hate you if u are a overprotective one!!
    I am already destroyed!
    It’s a lesson for me to not be like my parents when it comes to parenting!!

  • I never wanna be a parent like this. My parents were real nice and they gave me freedom but if i did some dumb shit they let me know.

  • I really wish my parents weren’t like this. I missed out on a lot as a teen and it shows in my now 20’s. I don’t understand anything about myself or most things. It’s a heavy thing to deal with.

  • Hey look its mom Ah 64 apache attack helicopter loaded with 8 atgms 2 aim 9x missiles and 4 gbu 65’s circling above “skies are clear sending in bomb load”

  • Cut myself for the first time because of this, I can’t tell them anything. I always have to tell my friends online about everything, go to them for advice because I trust them more than my parents. I’m rebellious, failing in school, and they are so headstrong that they don’t realize it even when I give them examples. I just can’t, what do I do… they are involved with everything, and they make it seem less because they give such bad punishments. If I do something wrong, it’s straight to taking my freedom away, because no freedom means more results right?

  • B.S.
    There are plenty of examples of extremely successful people who come from big families and as an only child with their parents ages ranging from teens (a woman like Oprah) to others who’s parents were in their 50s when they were born.

    A persons success has NOTHING to do with the age of the parents or how many kids are in the family.
    It always comes down to a person’s own will. An individual can determine their own success despite outer circumstances.

    To blame society, your parents, etc is a lazy excuse to not be the best version of themselves as a person.

  • My helicopter parents need to watch this. I can’t even cook a simple meal without them jumping like I’m going to burn the house down

  • From what I see in the video, some helicopter parents provide affection and care. Well, my helicopter parents only provide nagging. It sucks.

  • Young and useless people that don’t have a clue about real life. When I was a young child the first house I lived in was my grand parents. It had a hand drawn water well in the kitchen and an out house for a toilet. Btw I am 50.

  • I constantly feel spoiled. ;-; Am I spoiled? IDK. I don’t think I behave like a spoiled person. I think my mom thinks I’m entitled because she’s always saying things like, “Why don’t you know how to cook? When I was your age, I was-” I feel like she expects me to act like a grown-up, yet treats me like a child. And I always feel useless, like I’m doing nothing with my life. (The only real thing I have going for me is ny smarts.) I sometimes wonder if I’m going to grow up to be a deadbeat living on the street, or if I’ll have to wh*** myself for money. Sorry for this long rant, I just had to get it off ny chest.

  • This made me cry lol, all of these are so incredibly true for me. I’m going to be moving out due to this and they’ve been trying to guilt trip and manipulate me into not doing it. For the past five years I’ve only gone out like once or twice a month. And only to the grocery store. I have to decline every invite to anything cause they don’t approve. I’ve found someone who makes me feel like I’m not so alone anymore but it’s my entire family against me. I don’t know if they’ll ever understand.

  • If it isn’t for my dad I would actually be able to go out with friends and walk around the neighborhood. I cant see my friends outside of school or go to that shop that’s 4 minutes away from my house. I am 14 and my whole life is just school and home My dad gave me anxiety without realizing it I am to scared to tell him because he’s abusive.

  • The mistakes my parents made really shaped me into a better person. I know some kids who were prevented from making any mistakes as kids so they mess everything up now

  • tHe worst thing is, kids watching this video who have hElicopter parents might be unabLe to talk about it, because their Parents monitor what they say and do in the internet.

  • It’s awful because I feel anger towards them every single day of my life and I don’t know how to resolve it. The resentment is eating me up but I don’t know how to talk to them either. I have absolutely no life skills and my mother despises the fact that I’m an introvert. And she blows up when you tell her: “maybe your upbringing had something to do with it.”

  • This is my parents for sure all my life they haven’t let me do what i wanted and. Now that I’m moving out they have just been on my case about it. I got a job offer in another state. Lately they have really been giving me a hard time and im just ready to get out of here

  • Yes they r, these ppl r creating sjw freaks n ruining our civilization with weak minded fools who run to the Democrat side n become blm protestors or more than 2 genders ideots who r so up in their own bs they cant even c that they r the problem

  • i live in a safe small town in the middle of nowhere and my mother won’t let me go anywhere unless i’m under constant parental surveillance and if she knows the parents. i am old enough to drive but i’m not allowed to walk on a sidewalk especially not when it’s dark outside. not only does she have no respect for my privacy, she doesn’t trust me even though i’ve given her no reason not to. she refuses to acknowledge my age and the fact that i’m graduating in less than two years. she “wants her little girl back” so much that i have no independence. i’m not even allowed to dress certain ways. i’m not allowed to see most of my friends because they’re all “bad influences”. she will always think that i am to young to make decisions no matter what my age is. i wish i had some control over my life. i can’t wait until i can move out.

  • bro im so fed up with this kind of parents. i can’t even wear an earring bcz they thought that i wanna be a gay person when i just wanna wear it for fashion just like my friends. i can’t even go to my friend’s birthday party. im very fed up with this kind of life. i just wanna grow up and study overseas bcz i wanna get over with this shit life and just pay their kindness as soon as possible

  • Well I can’t really talk to my parents because of my trust issues and my mom finds everyway to bring up my depression and sxcidal thoughts in the conversation…..I just can’t talk to her normally……

  • Overprotective parents are lazy incompetent parents but also mentally abusive because they only care about shushing their paranoid thought and won’t bat their eye at the depression they inflict other their children. Mothers are the worst. I hardly see a cool mom who worries more about letting them live their childhood to the fullest than give into stupid fears. I spoke to a few but they are like Diamonds.

  • I feel like weeping, I never had a childhood. because I never enjoyed being a kid because I felt so depressed, neglected and ignored. I feel like my spirit has been stolen I was forced to adapt to my mothers and other families paranoia and most of the times I just stayed in my room, playing the PS or draw and just lived in my own world where I can be free in a different form.

    Seriously, if you are an overprotective parent.. I hope you can live with the fact that your children will resent you. Deep inside they will, they never know what it’s like to be young and experience opportunities for a good life.

    I don’t want relationships because I want to avoid having freedom altered or have someone call/ask me and ask where I’m at or where I’m going I become annoyed when ppl show the slightest concern towards me, wether if it’s justified or not. I want everyone who is controlling to stay away or I no longer want to talk to people who deny me something that within my rights. Simply because I don’t want to deal with anyone who display behaviour that is similar to my parents.

  • This is why I don’t like my helicopter parent
    1.cant hang out with my friends until marriage
    2.cant move out until marriage*cause they think that women’s that move out are [email protected]
    3.have to listen to my mom or else I’m dead
    4.no boyfriends until marriage
    5.no makup until in in my 20s
    6.no dying hair until 50
    7.no getting close to a dog
    8. Can’t touch pets
    9. I have no opion
    10.no sex before marriage
    11.my parents go through my phone every thing and my mum stalks my social media’s account *I wonder who told her my accounts

    There’s like 100 more but I can’t go on forever
    The sad part in my family my mom doesn’t Belive in female rights cause men can do whatever they want but in my family they always judge the females

  • i’m not allowed outside ever without them i cant see my friends, go for walks by myself, or even have my own opinions i’m constantly slut shammed by my mom bc i have always been ig rlly sexually open? idk how to explain it, ive told them many times the way they treat me is draining nd i’m both anxious and depressed, they tell me to stop being a spoiled brat and keep my mouth shut. My mom even says if i hate it so much just kill myself…

  • I was listening to study music once. The house went quiet all of a sudden an my parents noticed that i was listening and they got really mad. They wanted to take away my PC just because i was listening to study music

  • My parents don’t allow me to do/like these things:

    1. Cut my hair into a Pixie. (I am a closeted genderfluid person, who wants to have a cut that allows me feel like all genders)

    2. Have an interest in true crime. (Which I love!)

    3. Won’t let me dress how I want. (I want to wear colonial style, but I hate dresses. So, I started telling my mom I wanted to wear more masculine colonial outfits. She said, “You’re not a boy.”)

    I want to be free and happy. But they’re controlling my life and making me be one way.

  • I’m 17 & I want to go to college next year but my family won’t even let me walk to the corner store by myself because their scared something bad will happen. Bad things do happen. But I don’t want to be caged.

  • Mom: don’t hang out with mentions friends names
    Me: why?
    Mom: don’t talk back to me. If I say no then it’s a no. You don’t need to know everything.
    Me: um…. Okay I guess

  • My dad worked a lot(still does) and my mom was the helicopter parent. I’m the only girl and youngest child of three. My brothers had a lot more freedom than I did and I didn’t know how negatively my mom’s hovering affected me until now. I’m paranoid, I feel like I’m constantly being watched or talked about, and my mom tells my business to our whole family. College became a way for me to experience life and the world for myself. If i never came to college I would still be in my room, still so naive, still living vicariously through the TV, and still being constantly watched by my mom even in my twenties.
    I’ve also realized that if you are naive, even your parents will use it to take advantage of you. From this I learned to stop taking my mom’s word and just do my own research. You’ll save yourself from constant embarrassment.

  • -Hey y’all. To those who have parents who are controlling, abusive, neglectful, or anything of the sort, you are NOT alone!

    -I believe that I have a controlling parent who tends to pick out what clothes I should wear (clothes that everyone else ends up liking but, NOT me), and restrict me for doing “certain” activities with friends because she thinks about my safety…In which I understand and all but, it’s very frustrating.

    -So, I just NOW turned 17 and I am planning on “re-creating” those moments that I have missed out in my childhood nor teen-years with friends once I turn 18!

    -I thank those who actually read this comment and I believe, NO, I know that soon, your time will come!!!

  • My teacher taught us that parenting and rules are a balance between freedom and protection. The hard part is getting the right balance. Helicopter parents don’t understand this balance, and instead go for protection too much

  • Since it was not mentioned in the video, I want to ask: Who else thinks that others know better and can do everything better? (not just parents, but also friends, lovers, everyone… )

  • I resent my parents a lot and I shut them because they feel the need to know my every more or and everything do it gets so annoying to the point where I cut my parents off completely

  • I once got roughly reprimanded for staying outside and riding my bike around the neighborhood for “too” long. I have a huge neighborhood though so it takes alot of time and energy to go around it. But because I guess I was 3 minutes too long, my mom thought that I had gotten in trouble, or as she said ” you need to be careful, you could have gotten human trafficked”. I literally live in one of the safest communities in the district ��( not saying that it still can’t happen tho).
    The point is, scenarios like this are one of the main reasons why I have such terrible Anxiety to the point where I can’t sleep half of the time.

  • My parents blame ME for being the way I am now. Not knowing THEY were the ones who made me end up like this. They always say they try to be good parents.. but they didn’t realize the were actually screwing me over. Now I’m in a world of trouble, just as all the ones stated in the video, from things THEY caused and I have to try and “fix” them. It’s so twisted. Hopefully we make it out alive children of Helicopter parent/s, overcome and undo everything that has already be done

  • not being able to make decisions is very problematic and damaging. this leads you to having intense anxiety, being overly cautious about everything, needing to learn everythinf you can about a situation and asking people for their reviews before you make a decision, not ever being satisfied with anything because of the uncertainty an fear of the unknown of what the other choice was.

  • Feel this rn, my mom is anytime i try to do anything its texts every mintue “where are you.” “Did you make it,” keep in mind im driving while she doing this, even flying somewhere with my friend its always the same thing

    “Its not that i dont trust you i dont trust other people.”

    And anytime i bring it up she acts like im the bad guy and makes me feel bad for just wanting to live my own life��

  • Perverse narcissistic parents will be in denial and reject your negative feelings over the whole situation on yourself which will only accentuate the low self esteem

  • Now that I’m eighteen i can see the way I’ve been raised has affected me negatively and i am trying hard to break out of it however when you have no clue where to start off it’s even more difficult

  • I have depression caused by my parents���� I love them ofc..But i dont feel happy anymore..they’re too over protective that i cant do the things that make me happy�� i hope i could feel happiness someday��✨ Maybe it feels like heaven��❤️ How bad i cant be happy like you����

  • Nobody relates to me, except you guys. These videos make me feel less lonely. Thank you guys, you don’t know how much this channel means to me.❤️

  • the problem is, if i were to talk to them about their helicopter parenting, they would get defensive and try to remind me of all the good things they’ve done and the bad things they’ve protected me from and make me feel bad about it.

  • My girlfriend is affected by “helicopter parents” and I’m trying to maker her see it by doing my own research on it to show her facts on the matter

  • If you explain to your parents that they are acting toxic they will just be more toxic. And I know that because my mom is a karen. Literally and figuratively.

  • I am going to send this to my aunt because she is like my mother but my mom is not a strict but my aunt is strict so I will send this to her

  • I hate helicopter parents. They’re idiots. This life is already difficult, and they make it worse for the kids by being helicopter parents.

  • Man my life is getting harder day by day�� i am just 13 and next month i will turn 14…. But the problem is
    My parents are very toxic cause
    Since i was a child like around 5 or 6
    My parents never used to allow me to go outside and play+my parents never allowed me to go on any school trip!! + They put me in a tution which was hell for me in that tution i used to get beated by my tution teacher. And they never taught me how behave when i finally left that tution when i was around 9 or 10 i didn’t knew that how to behave i didn’t had any friends!! And i used to imagine friends in my mind and i used to talk with my imaginary friend

    And then my school teacher noticed this habbit and then in a parents meeting my class teacher talked about my this happit and then

    My mom was like we are really sorry!! But then also she didn’t realized this!!

    And then my teacher used to think that i am mentally ill

    After a very long time!! When i was in
    6 grade i wanted to go for the school trip
    And my mom was like no and then i asked her “WHY” she replied i know better than you u have no good friends then i cried a lot and then

    Things were not good at all
    I learned how to behave like a
    Gentlemen and i made some good friends

    And when i realized this that my parents are wrong it was too late

    And ever i try to discuss this with them they keep saying no

    I am so depressed �� idk what to do?

    HELP ME

  • I don’t think it’s helicopter parenting. I think it’s children being parentified by immature, needy or reckless parents that is causing the problem. Then they don’t have energy for themselves.

  • I’d issue an injunction against the hockey league president prohibiting his enforcing the ban on parents attending league games, him and the league have no right to forbid parental or legal guardian attendance whether he likes it or not. If he tried to implement said policy, I’d hold him in contempt and issue a warrant for his arrest and same if he tried appealing my decision.

  • My overprotective parents actually taught me a pretty useful thing. They unintentionally taught me to lie perfectly lmao. Unfortunately, just recently I realized that out of 100% of what I tell them only 10-15% is true. Just afraid of telling them any true details of my life since 4th grade

  • Can we please just get the whole thing? Annoying to have to watch the same segments over again when the full thing finally comes out

  • This parenting is horrible, you can’t put a blindfold over your kids eyes and expect them to be perfect after you take it off, they haven’t even SEEN the world yet because you blocked it off, kids need to know how disgusting and horrible this world is and how it can punch you down and kick you on the ground, all they know is “where is my parents to do this, I need help”

  • My mom isn’t a helicopter parent, but it’s so f*ing depressing to see some other kids having to go through shitty parents. I hope the next generation of parents won’t repeat the previous one.

  • And it sucks because there is no one to blame, my parents were just a bunch of scarred people trying their best to raise a child yet unsurprisingly they failed and badly.

  • This is my mom. She lets my sisters be who are older and I’m 25 and she still babys me on things like this. Sometimes i always assume she learns from her whiny Abigail Folger looking “sis” of hers aka her girlfriend because she is the same way. She’ll complain if I’m swearing on FB and she says it is bad. I’m an adult so how would she know what is good and what is bad? I’ll swear if i like.

  • Parents who spank their children are teaching their children to hit. All parents should pledge to never hit, slap or spank their children. Talk to them with respect and with love. Whipping children with paddles, belts, branches or any other device is “child abuse” and you should be arrested. These beatings leave big bruises. See my Facebook page “School Paddling is Child Abuse.” Dallas Morning News reported that beatings of children still go on in rural North Texas schools. 31 states have banned school corporal punishment but 19 including Texas still allow it.

  • A must see for drug users, misguided souls, criminals and adult bums… those always in moral dilemmas… for civil society violators and deviants… ����❤️ for those needing rehabs. �� or those perennially still dependent and burdens to their parents even at adulthood. ��

  • And when the parents are on their death bed, they will stare at the ceiling and think “Oh God, what have I done? I raised a child, and not an adult. How will they cope without me?” They will plead with God “Please! Take me back! My children cannot survive after my death! Let me go back and I will teach them as I was suppose to!”

    And, if such wish was granted, those parents would go back to their helicoptering ways. It is in their mindset, it is in their blood, they cannot help it. They are such characters that for them to helicopter it is the same as being an alcoholic spending his children’s savings.

    Some children will go above that and become even more independent than those that were given it, for they also acquired the skills to resist tyranny. Those parents, they will not have to suffer a regret they otherwise would’ve faced. But for the rest, such parents will close their eyes for the final time blissfully unaware of their faults in raising the children.

  • I think they also have a hand in the opiod epidemic too
    Every kid I knew with annoying parents got drunk or high even harder than the rest

  • I’ve battled depression for many years, due in part to my mother. I told her that she is the reason, and she shrugged it off and told me she wasn’t. She’s toxic.

  • 23 here. Treated like I’m 10. I can look after myself perfectly fine, yet they still insist on being as authoritarian as possible with me.

  • My mom is a helicopter parent. She thinks she kept me safe from evil, but she always (and continues to make) excuses for the evil within my own family, especially my father..

  • So I think I might have helicopter parents but I’m not sure. My parents make me ask them before I can download an app (they have the Apple ID password) and then spend weeks or even months before getting back to me. My dad has screen time turned on for every app (except for messages and phone calls) besides YouTube and has it on the ENTIRE day. His reason? I’m ‘on my phone too much’. Both he and my mom have the password for my email account. My dad once made me go outside for 10+ minutes in 30 degree weather without a coat because I was having trouble focusing on a test. My mother excused it by saying he was having a bad day. Yet, when I’m generally pissed off they get mad and tell me it isn’t an excuse. My mom’s the okay parent but my biological dad (her husband) is pretty much a nightmare. He has a terrible temper. Once when I was feeling insanely depressed and collapsed on the floor, hyperventilating and crying he told me to ‘stop otherwise I’d faint’. Didn’t even ask me if I was okay. The only thing I can talk to him about without me or him getting mad or annoyed is our cat. (She’s fabulous but that’s for another time). My mom actually somewhat cares. When I told her I felt terrible when my half-sister’s boyfriend’s mum called me her “sister” she told me I ‘shouldn’t get emotion over words’. I’m currently hugely questioning my gender so thanks mum. Unfortunately I can’t do anything because I’m homeschooled and a minor. Sorry for the rant.:)

  • As someone who is trying to adult, not gonna lie. It’s hard. And that four step method? That got me through (believe it or not) two years of highschool shop class. More people need that method than anyone else. It helps.

  • I’ve written a saying for helicopter parents, and it’s called ‘Just because you love someone, doesn’t mean they can’t die’, the ‘die’ part is meaning, things are going to go wrong anyway.

  • It’s awesome the west takes these problems seriously while here in the middle east they praise the fuck out of parents, no matter what they do.

  • Helicopter parents:doesn’t let their 26 year old son get a job and get out of the house because it ‘is a threat to national security’

  • I wish my mom would leave me alone!!!l i cant stand her!!!!! She is on my nerves i cant!!! She is the reason why im fucked up. I hate her so much i cant stand her she is the annyoing fly in ur room at night. Just leave me alone let me breath

  • My dad was on the verge of being a helicopter parent but had to shut that down real quick. He would want me to cook my food his way and if not just start yelling at me and I dont take being yelled at for stupid shit kindly and will gladly on the spot retaliate against you no matter what the outcome would be. he would also try and gain control of every situation even though I’m fully capable of completing it. I’m currently 20 in the navy and have been working for everything I have like I been doing my whole life. As for now my dad learned the past 7 years(since I lived with my brother and sister with my grandparents for 13 years) what to say how to say and what to do and not to do when it comes to me. We have a decent relationship but a few hiccups here and there.

  • I’m getting anxiety attack bcs of my dad being helicopter parent.I hate this situation.no way to save me..I want to scream as hard as I can and run away from this..I hate this

  • America does not lock up child predators. NEVER HAVE them alone in a populated Area. Also never have AN UNDER 12 cooking on a stove bur will ruin a child’s life completely. Check out a pediatric brain unit and you’ll see what I mean. It’s a fine line but it’s our responsibility to make sure they reach adulthood with a fully intact body, and a sharp mind.

  • This is why ANTINATALISM IS THE BEST WAY…. Stop having kids, stop being a burden on the planet and STOP the overpopulation and giving birth to little brats that will only go on to trash this planet and become an even bigger scourge on society.

  • I’m 23, I have a masters degree and got my first job at a major company with a great salary right out the gate all completely through my own hard work. My parents still treat me like a child.

  • Yes definetly it is part of common sense. Overprotection might create excusses parents to give their childern everything which creates a narcist. Narcist are mentaly ill.

  • My broken family fucked up my childhood expediently I was a sook of a child, a typical homesick mummy’s girl ���� slept in my mums bed till I was probably 12 years old lol and would cry for my mum even when I got dropped off at my dads for the weekend, and she would come pick me up ����‍♀️������
    Bad parenting is the result of why I am now at 21 yrs old, completely useless and have no direction of where I’m going in the world. I don’t see how I’ll ever be independentI have no good qualities of wife or girlfriend material, hence why I was in an abusive relationship for 7 years that just ended the other week….
    Although it’s form of generational bad parenting tactics where my parents were raised by very strict parents with expectations of them to get out and get a job my parents were less strict on me I guess to make up for what they were missing in their childhood so when it came to being a teenager and mum trying to push me to get a job it was an instant refusal from me because she had hand fed me my whole life and by that time it was already too late all the baby treatment and doing things for me that ended up detrimental side effects to how I would grow as an individual failed because I didn’t know how to do anything for myself because I was never pushed from young and disciplinedmostly because my father was the discipliner that I was scared of not my mum my dad was also abusive to my mum though so I see why she would’ve tried to be more loving, probably because she needed it herself for her own comfort my parents pushed their insecurities onto me in a way I think to try diagnose it, and now I’m a pathetic excuse of a young adult woman completely incapable…

  • This is what happens when you remove men from children’s lives, and disempower the ones who stay. Pretty much all helicopter parents are women.

  • I have helicopter parents. They don’t let me go anywhere alone, not even for a short walk around the house, but at the same time they complain that I’m always at home. They also say, that I can tell them everything, but if I do they judge me. My parents make decisions for me, that I don’t want and control my life. I don’t have any place where I have at least a little bit privacy (We live in a small flat, I share my room with my brother and when I’m finally alone, they come in every 10 minutes without knocking to see what I’m doing) Strict parents have good intentions, they want their children to be safe and study a lot, but instead they simply raise sneaky, good liars.
    (I know it’s old and sorry for my English, it’s my third language)

  • Having helicopter parents is not a good thing as in my case. I have trouble being a young adult. I wish my parents raised me to become more independent and resourceful enough to tackle the daily challenges of life. They are overly controlling to the point that they are becoming intrusive to my personal space, tastes and preferences. It also hurts that I am a discreet or closeted gay man as both especially my father is an extreme homophobe and misogynist. ��

  • Everything is clear in this video but for one thing. A true parenting, to my mind, is not only in enabling our children ‘strike out on their own’ but in returning to us as friends with whom we will walk in life till the very end. This is what such videos usually fall short of telling. The image of ‘an all-responsible absolutely dependable successful doer’ is being promoted anyway and widely enough. Perhaps, that is why the weak and elderly parents, the weak people in general, are pushed aside and die lonesome in the old people’s homes. What cartoon should be made to promote an image of someone who is not directed at ultimate success at all costs?

  • How can he say that we are ignorant about this? The concept is simple, the ultimate test is, how capable is your child if they go out into the world without you by their side? Have you raised your child to be able to look after themselves and be a useful member of society, or have you created a person who is essentially crippled because they need constant handholding to get through life, someone who is a burden to you, themselves and the rest of society.

    My job as a parent is to raise my children so that they are, at the very least, capable of making the best of their life circumstances and hopefully even contribute to their fellow beings.

  • 25 and grew up with helicopter parents, only recently after seeing a therapist about whats happening in my life right now did i come to find out that all of my lifes problems all stem from the way my mother raised me… im on the right track now.

  • Yes.
    Also, Baby boomers are actually the original ‘millennials’. They were the first generation to be spoiled and emotionally stunted. Before baby boomers, there was no such thing as the teenage demographic. Ever since then, each successive generation seems to be getting worse and worse

  • In a small town village,my mom wouldn’t let me cross the road because she was afraid I would get hit by a car. She never let us go to nearby neighbour villages(with a bike, 3 miles away). And now whenever I go anywhere I don’t tell her where I’m going with my bike.

  • As a migrant single parent with no relatives close by done everything I could do by meself for my children without knowing it is a such a bad parenting. Made their lunches and packed and dropped them at school until they finished year 12. Now I do understand why they are still depending on me. They are working part time and studying full time now. But, still they are not ready to make them selves. Feel guilty now. I protected them as I was working full time take caring them full time and I did not want any other problems.

  • I know a woman who was such a helicopter parent that she didn’t even see that her child had off-the-charts ADHD. She said she wanted to be the perfect parent, and in her mind that meant that her child would never have a moment alone. Either she or her husband had to be “interacting” with the kid at all times. Once the kid started going to school, it was clear to everyone that this had been a mistake everyone except mom. Her child has been held back 3 times in his first 4 years of school.

  • My dad, ex baby sister and my teacher are so disappointed becuz i have changed to be more independent and socialable they said “you are not cute anymore. always play with your friend, not family, im so disappointed! I like more when you are so spoiled! No body want an independent girls!! Disgusting!” Meanwhile i hangedout with my friend just once amonth. Im so glad now im orphaned.!!

  • That’s why my mom is great. She always said that the worst thing you can do to a kid is make them dependent. I started packing my lunch on my own in third grade. I knew people that still don’t pack their own lunch, and I’m in high school.

  • Yo one of the girls in my school (I have lunch with her) and she told me her mom doesn’t letter use YOUTUBE or any other social media…
    She also said that her mom wouldn’t let her go trick or treating unless she wore a dress 0-o

    I was very confused..

  • Teach. Demonstrate. Let them practice under supervision. Encourage when they do it on their own. Encourage when they have difficulties. Send them out again with love and confidence.

    Everybody needs coaching and guidance. Even Olympic athletes. But ultimately you encourage while they do it

  • My parents are helicopters to the extreme, and I think it’s starting to cause me social problems. A few extreme examples are: When I go to school they even try to hold my hand and walk me across the street and I have to take my hand away and they still try to go with me:/. Also I lost an eye from cancer and now they force me to go to school with the stupidest-looking goggles, no matter how hard I protest, because they think I might accidentally gauge my good eye out somehow. They weren’t like this with my three older siblings and even they can see that it’s pretty bad.

  • I need some help with my helicopter parents. Don’t care about much else, I just need to figure out how to get them to stop limiting my screen time to 1 hour. I’m trying to get them to lift it entirely, but it won’t work. BTW im 14 and the only shooter game I can play is Destiny 2, so ontop of this, can any of you destiny 2 fans tell me the fastest way to get more glimmer.

  • My ex had/has a helicopter mom it was terrible… her mother controlled and still does control her life, she forced her to go to college for something she didn’t want to do and didnt want her to get a job either even at the age of 18, even now during this quarantine stuff shes back in state from college and turns 19 this year still has to be home at certain time… has her own car but her mother keeps the keys and she has to ask to leave the house. While we where together I would try to I guess corrupt there daughter to live her life the way she wants it.. not by your parents. Long story short, shes to far into be controlled by her mother that theres no coming back from it. I tried my best and thought she would stand up against her mother but now her life depends on her basically, roof over her head, gave her her first car, never had a job, has everything handed to her literally. Me being the complete opposite though is a reason the relationship didnt really work out. I know what I want in life and chose the navy, buying my first car, im used to being independent. Buying everything with my money I earned from working. And got a bright future planned

  • Let me tell you how helicopter parenting affected me..
    1) I turned into an antisocial, introverted geek.
    2) I got low self esteem ( as mentioned )
    3) I lost interest in everything ( like hanging out with people of opposite gender can make you confident and mentally stable. But I’m an exception. My parents won’t allow me to do that. I’m starting to hate everything)
    4) leave about the opposite gender, I’m not even allowed to talk much with my buddies or go to their homes.
    5) I get offended again and again, I cry when no ones monitoring me.
    RIP MYSELF

  • I feel like weeping. I didn’t have a good childhood, most of my days I was stuck in my room while I heard other kids play and laugh,
    I was forced to deal with overprotectI’ve behaviour because it’s “love” when I tried to speak about my hurt feelings and being questioned with paranoia as my elders motive really shattered my soul. And guess what I’m told. “It’s because they love you”

    To this day I don’t want to be in relationship because it alters your freedom, I panic a little when men ask me out. And i think love is a very corrupt emotion if that makes you behave like that.

    And no, I doubt anything happen to them because they go out and come home late whenever it suits them.

  • Your Daily Joke:

    A refinery is under fire. Units of the local fire service helplessly watch the blazing flames and explosions. A few moments later, a vehicle from the volunteer fire department appears. The old truck passes the local fire service and rams the fence straight into the blaze. Volunteers emerge from the vehicle and put out the fire. A few weeks later, the Governor congratulates the brave volunteers and asks them if he could help them in any way. One of the men replies:

    The brakes on our truck do not work. We could use an overhaul.

  • The kid in HS who isn’t allowed to be online. How the fuck is he supposedd to do researches for school and stuff? Newspaper archives and encyclopedias at the library? I’d think he can use it for school under survaillance, but he specified “at all”. What the absolute fuck?

  • My teacher calls them snow plow parents because they push all the kids obstacles out of their way so when they go to the real world, they can’t overcome those obstacles

  • Things I have seen a batshit helicopter mom do:

    Hit her son on the back repeatedly for not using her writing in a school report.
    Storm downstairs and yell at her son for three minutes straight because, while she was doing her hair, she heard him getting a cereal bowl from the wrong side of the cupboard.
    Touch her son on the back and run away, then get mad at him for saying it made him uncomfortable.
    Call her son a freak for not showing physical affection towards her or his father like other kids.
    Sabotage her son’s chance at an opportunity to better himself abroad because she didn’t believe in his abilities.
    Yell at her daughter for having difficulty swallowing a pill.
    Threaten to beat her daughter out of a depression-induced catatonic state.
    Blame her children for their father’s being hospitalized for depression.
    Defend hitting her son because he had gotten so little work done on that report.
    Play victim whenever her son brings any of this up because his mentioning it makes her feel bad.

    Oh, did I mention these were all the same mother? Or that it was my mother?

  • at 12:21 I did something similar I wasn’t allowed to watch YouTube but I found this Minecraft ringtone thing that would let me get to it even though it was blocked or something on safari

  • I’m a helicopter parent and I resent most of what you say. It’s not bad to watch over your child and make sure they don’t get hurt and help them prevent making mistakes. On top of that, you have left out what helicopter parents do. We prevent our child from getting hurt and we then tell them what they did wrong and how they can prevent it in the future. Other parents let their kids run free and wild and meet the wrong kids and questionable adults while we keep the child safe and let them grow up in a safe environment. Yeah, we give the kid virtually no freedom for there entire childhood, but would you give your child freedom when taking into account the world you live in? when you have a five-year-old or seven-year-old child, then come talk to me. but before then, go fu*k yourself.

  • Those kids weren’t “glazed over” because of ADHD medication, they were probably glazed over because Stone Mountain is actually really fucking boring.
    Source: am on ADHD medication, have been to Stone Mountain.

  • IQ, measuring abilities how science can exploit your intelligence for benefiting the select few. Mensa people are the most boring as hell. Another way of showing a certain type of person with abnormal intercourse with knowledge. Imagine setting around people trying one up you. Peterson is obsessed with intelligence.

  • My aunts kid had an allergic reaction to a fruity drink (allegedly). And they forbid him from eating any fruit.They’re batshit crazy.

  • I can’t believe that one about changing a kid’s name so he can get his lunch a little bit sooner. If I believe it, I will lose what faith I have left in the overall goodness of humanity.

  • I get so pissed my dad is helicoptering me now that I’m 35 when he wasn’t even around as a kid when he divorced my mum and went overseas with another lady and her child who he tries to make a our family!! His contact is totally unwanted by me and it just amazes me why he is trying to helicopter at this point in time. It’s like shit if I’m 35 and grew up without you what the hell is the purpose of all this contact now?? Im glad he wasn’t around if this is the way he is. Hed only contact me every 6 months at times before, what the hell is all this now?? I don’t need his concern.

  • Great. Hell’s full. Satan’s list is backing up into Earth. Gonna need a lot more than 7 layers if you want to fit in these creatures…

  • Seriously, no kid asked to have you as a parent let alone being born.

    And if you are going to act like an overprotective nutjob and deny your kid a childhood like the other kids from the block then they will mourn that you took their chance away to be happy and develop healthy friendships with others. You are the type of parents CPS should go after.

  • My mom used to deny me privileges and then when it was given to me my life became a mess. Now I am a parent of two and my mistakes make me be a wonderful parent today

  • This was my mom’s process when teaching me how to wash and fold my own clothes at 8yrs old. I remember going to highschool with people who didn’t know how to work a washing machine cause their mom always did their clothes for them. So sad.

  • I’m a helicopter parent. My daughter doesn’t know it. Because i am uniquely subtle. Sometimes i laugh because she wishes I was…a helicopter parent i mean…Hahahahaha.. I don’t know if anyone understands.

  • For future parents out there planning to have kids, PLEASE do not be like my helicopter parent mom. Your kids will be too dependent on you and they won’t ever learn how to do things on their own, talking from my own experience. Let your kids explore and make mistakes because they’re opportunities to learn. My parents shielded me from everything bad in the world. As a young child sure that’s nice, but now as a teenager I’m no where near ready for the adult world.

  • My parents are overprotective and disciplinarian and we end up happy,peaceful,spontaneous,free,charitable,loving and forgiving.We are devout Catholic.We have curfews and chaperones. we are 9 siblings all beautiful and handsome and all professionals.Thanks for my disciplinarian parents. i don’t regret the way my parents handle us. A disciplined person is happy person. All our siblings don’t engage in alcohol,drugs,free sex,gambling,smoking.

  • PBD, do your research on anyone you advertise. Fiji water is run by one of the dirtiest families on the planet. They rewrote all the CA water laws and are partially responsible for the “droughts” in CA. Hope you enjoyed the Fiji water.

  • As parent, I think about this the whole time. My kids are almost adults, and for me the most difficult thing is to let them make their own choice and learn from consequences. They always ask for advice, and do on their own. It’s not easy to see when they do something wrong, but that’s the onley way they can learn.

    This World is so great, I just love how we all got different wires in the head❤️

  • Letting kids make mistakes is good

    I learned a lot of hard lessons after getting trouble and it definitely shaped who I am now lol. Like breaking bones, or going somewhere without permission and getting yelled at by other adults besides my parents, cutting my hair as a 7 year old, the list is long for me but I’m not rude or entitled in any way. I have an older brother that’s a brute and a younger sister who’s given me experience with being good at dealing with young kids.

    As a 20 year old I’m thankful my parents were helicopters or bulldozer types in my life.

  • over protecting your kids?!?

    maybe we should think of simply keeping a family together…
    Single parents everywhere I go.
    Dumb idiots always seeking something new and beautyfull only to realise their chasing their tail all the rest of their life��

  • It depends on the child’s ambition to develop skills to become independent my mother was a helicopter parent she forbidden me to wash on her washing machine but eventually my older sibling helped me learn how to wash.

  • Interview Jordan Peterson and Simon Sinek at the same time and let them talk to each other as well and just film it. It’ll be gold.

  • I had no idea what a helicopter mom was and I was full on expecting this to be about families who have moms that work in the air force.

  • Is there anything I could do about this i’m a 20 year old female and my parents has taken my freedom I can’t date or go out if I do I go out for two hours I been thinking about getting a therapist or psychologist I just want someone to talk to about this I can’t Do anyhing I sneak out and they don’t know but I have no choice I been depressed they don’t know about this can someone please help:(

  • My parents will never understand because ” they know better than myself” and they will say how cruel and ungrateful I am. They are very emotionally manipulative, and I am cursed to have them ��

  • Making kid’s lives easier is not a difficult question. If that model worked, then you could sit on the couch in order to develop more muscles… and the US military would NOT structure bootcamp they way they do. You grow through a level of stress and adversity.

  • This is good channel for anyone who is in trouble especially helicopter parents but in the end the parents are gonna say eh we don’t do that

  • Remember,
    HITLER’S MOTHER was a helicopter parent! Hitlers elder siblings died at a young age, so she gave him too much love when he was born. After her death, he was devastated as he was highly connected and kind of dependent on her.

  • My father mostly ignored me unless I did something he dissaproved off. Then I got his full “attention” of course.
    My father wasn’t a helicopter parent but rather a Stuka (infamous german WW2 dive bomber)

  • Was always taught to implement willfully neglect. Once the kids reach 8 years you keep the children forget to bring a coat when it’s cold it an umbrella when it’s about to rain. They will learn.

    Let kids make mistakes.