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After Losing My Daughter to Postpartum Depression, I Decided to Be an Agent of Change My daughter was lost to maternal mental health depression.I wondered how many other women are feeling this way. HealthyWomen Editors. I dread it because my wife — the mother of my 6-year-old daughter — is gone.

Each year, I fight back tears as my daughter lies in my bed asking questions about why her mommy is. Jan. 1, 2001 When David Resnick’s wife, Susan, experienced severe postpartum depression after the birth of their second child, the couple’s world fell apart. “I went into survival mode,” David.

My Daughter’s Postpartum Depression. March 23, 2015 by Kelley Allen. By Shawnee Anderson. As mothers, we always hope to have the answers for our children — to have the ability to make their lives better, to be there when they need.

The lines of loss and grief and postpartum depression are so blurred I could not see them clearly, and I know very few loss moms who can. What I can say is, after my subsequent pregnancy, one that did not involve loss, I felt many of the familiar feelings return. The paralyzing grief was not there but the weight of my feet was just as heavy. I have severe PTSD and depression, and when I went on Zoloft, it was amazing. Suddenly I had the energy to take my daughter to the park or the library.

I didn’t wake up wanting to go back to bed. I also suffered from postpartum anxiety after my son was born in February. How I Gained It: After giving birth to my daughter, I suffered from postpartum depression.To make matters worse, I was laid off from my job the same week I returned from my maternity leave. I felt like I was failing at motherhood and became even more depressed when I could no longer contribute financially to our household.

At the time, I never considered that I had postpartum depression symptoms. I figured I was just angry about my circumstances, and my sadness was linked to my hearing loss, not my new baby. Somehow, I managed to struggle through depression after pregnancy.

Looking back, I clearly needed help and was lucky to make it through without intervention. Perinatal Mental Health Discussion Tool for Parents Experiencing Loss. As many as 1 in 7 moms (1 in 10 dads) experience symptoms of depression and anxiety during the postpartum period. People of every age, income level, race and culture can develop Perinatal Mood Disorders (PMDs) during pregnancy and within the first year after delivery.

Postpartum depression (PPD) is a stealthy condition. I nearly missed it. I was visiting a close friend who had given birth to her first child about a month earlier.

As I cradled her little boy, he let out a tiny perfect baby yawn and my heart melted. “You won’t believe what he just did,” I gushed, as my friend emerged from her bedroom.

List of related literature:

As you cared for your newborn and got used to your new role, you acquired a new layer of identity as a “parent.”

“Giving The Love That Heals” by Harville Hendrix, Helen Hunt
from Giving The Love That Heals
by Harville Hendrix, Helen Hunt
Atria Books, 1998

And she can offer emotional support that acknowledges how exhausting it can be to care for a crying baby, encouraging the mother to reach out for help and support from other friends and family members (Level 5).

“Handbook of Attachment-Based Interventions” by Howard Steele, Miriam Steele
from Handbook of Attachment-Based Interventions
by Howard Steele, Miriam Steele
Guilford Publications, 2019

Postpartum depression affects the transition to the maternal role for many mothers.

“Maternity and Pediatric Nursing” by Susan Scott Ricci, Terri Kyle
from Maternity and Pediatric Nursing
by Susan Scott Ricci, Terri Kyle
Wolters Kluwer Health/Lippincott Williams & Wilkins, 2009

Inform the mother that many women feel depressed after childbirth and that help is available.

“Foundations of Maternal-Newborn and Women's Health Nursing” by Sharon Smith Murray, MSN, RN, C, Emily Slone McKinney, MSN, RN, C
from Foundations of Maternal-Newborn and Women’s Health Nursing
by Sharon Smith Murray, MSN, RN, C, Emily Slone McKinney, MSN, RN, C
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2013

Postpartum depression (PPD; previously called postnatal depression, PND) is depression in the year after birth.

“Psychiatry P. R. N” by Specialty Doctor in Learning Disabilities Sarah Stringer, Laurence Church, Roxanne Keynejad, Consultant Psychiatrist Juliet Hurn, Clinical Research Training Fellow and St4 Higher Trainee in General Adult Psychiatry Roxanne Keynejad
from Psychiatry P. R. N
by Specialty Doctor in Learning Disabilities Sarah Stringer, Laurence Church, et. al.
Oxford University Press, 2020

She may also be able to help you release previous traumatic birth experiences before you give birth again.

“Yoga Mama, Yoga Baby: Ayurveda and Yoga for a Healthy Pregnancy and Birth” by Margo Shapiro Bachman, Vasant Lad
from Yoga Mama, Yoga Baby: Ayurveda and Yoga for a Healthy Pregnancy and Birth
by Margo Shapiro Bachman, Vasant Lad
Sounds True, 2013

Postpartum depression peer support: Maternal perceptions from a randomized controlled trial.

“Maternal Child Nursing Care in Canada E-Book” by Shannon E. Perry, Marilyn J. Hockenberry, Deitra Leonard Lowdermilk, Lisa Keenan-Lindsay, David Wilson, Cheryl A. Sams
from Maternal Child Nursing Care in Canada E-Book
by Shannon E. Perry, Marilyn J. Hockenberry, et. al.
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2016

Postpartum depression is a totally different beast.

“Rinnavation: Getting Your Best Life Ever” by Lisa Rinna, Maureen O'Neal
from Rinnavation: Getting Your Best Life Ever
by Lisa Rinna, Maureen O’Neal
Pocket Books, 2009

Postpartum depression is characterized by extreme sadness and anxiety as well as physical exhaustion that can make it difficult for a new mother to care for her newborn child.8

“Psychosocial Occupational Therapy E-Book” by Nancy Carson
from Psychosocial Occupational Therapy E-Book
by Nancy Carson
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2019

Prompt diagnosis and treatment is needed for postpartum depression.

“AWHONN's Perinatal Nursing” by Kathleen R. Simpson
from AWHONN’s Perinatal Nursing
by Kathleen R. Simpson
Wolters Kluwer Health, 2013

Oktay Kutluk

Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.

Mail: [email protected]
Telephone: +1 (877) 492-3666

Biography: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/kutluk_oktay/
Bibliography: oktay_bibliography

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49 comments

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  • I really, really hope that the daughter doesn‘t start to blame herself as she gets older. That would be absolutely horrible. What a great and strong dad tho!

  • Post pardom is hard,im suffuring from it 18 months after birth since we did not get it right away, the imbalance gets worse and everyrhing goes wrong,my mariage fell apart and now going through divorce but ive also faced suicidal toughts for a long time and now ignore them but still hard to get up every morning.

  • Yes, I remember crying hysterically and pleading my husband/mom that i am not alright. No one listened. Only help… I got a small baby kit after delivering my baby that i did not open until 1 month after. It had so much detailed information about post pregnancy depression.

    I went to my husband with that book and said I was not making up stories…. But reaction never changed.

    5 years forward…. I don’t trust him anymore. I take care of myself n kids… N take decisions on my own.

    So, sad when u re all alone n ppl sit next to u have no idea.. Nor they care.

  • As a Black woman many of us are not allowed to have these postpartum. Our relationships are nonexistent or in shambles. Having an abortion is the best option for many of us and if you don’t have an abortion you can look forward to minimal support, societal criticism, abuse or abandonment from the men who impregnated us and to have the burden of everything on your back. I was so depressed I was walking around with sandals on my feet in October, crying myself to sleep every night but was up in time to prepare my son for the day and shower him with smiles and love meanwhile I was crumbling in the inside. I couldn’t afford suicide because no one would care for my children and they would end up more broken than I was/am.

  • Wow reading all these comments of people including myself who suffered with PPD or PPA is surreal. Thinking about all the millions of women who suffer in silence.

  • As a doula who focuses on postpartum care, this makes me heart sing with joy! This is AMZING! EVERY SINGLE MOTHER needs this kind of support. Thank you, Steven! <3 <3 <3

  • God bless everyone on here especially Steven/ I experienced this and I’ve always said it’s a demonic spirit. I had bad/dark thoughts(I would never say to my family)of hurting myself and my baby, thank God it did pass

  • Steven you are such an amazing person with such empathy. You did not sit and take this you fought firstly for your wife and when you lost her you fought generically for women. You daughter is such a beautiful and gifted child. Too often children are not allowed to speak of dead parents but you have normalise this for her. You have done such amazing work so for. Your wiide would have been so proud of you. Bless you and your daughter as you keep flying the flag.

  • Do you want your Ex husband/wife or lover to come back to you and stay forever with more love and more Respect within 24hours dr JAJ is the answer to your problem him also help me to bring back my lover HE is certainly the best spell caster online and YOU CAN COTACTE HIM ON [email protected] yahoo.com OR ([email protected]) result is 100% guarantee

  • This men is amazing i like that they keep moms with the baby’s. Also i think after birth a mother needs sleep.she gose through a long labor and then has no rest

  • An amazing testimony on a spell caster who
    brought my wife back to me..My name is Andy
    Sowers,i live in Australia,and I’m happily married
    to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids.A very
    big problem occurred in my family seven months
    ago,between me and my wife.so terrible that she
    took the case to court for a divorce.she said that
    she never wanted to stay with me again,and that
    she didn’t love me anymore.So she packed out of
    my house and made me and my children passed
    through severe pain. I tried all my possible means
    to get her back,after much begging,but all to no
    avail.and she confirmed it that she has made her
    decision,and she never wanted to see me again.
    So on one evening,as i was coming back from
    work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my
    wife.So i explained every thing to her,so she told
    me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to
    visit a spell caster,because it has really worked
    for her too.So i never believed in spell,but i had
    no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then
    she gave me the email address of the spell caster
    whom she visited.{[email protected] gmail.com }.
    So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address
    she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me
    that i will get my wife back the next day.What an
    amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke
    with me,and told me everything that i need to do.
    Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife
    who didn’t call me for the past seven {7}
    months,gave me a call to inform me that she was
    coming back.So Amazing!! So that was how she
    came back that same day,with lots of love and
    joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the
    pain she caused me and my children. Then from
    that day,our relationship was now stronger than
    how it were before,by the help of a spell caster.
    So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the
    same,if you
    are in any condition like this,or you have any
    problem related to “bringing your ex back. So
    thanks to Dr jaj for bringing back
    my wife,and brought great joy to my family once
    again. {[email protected] )    [email protected]   Thanks call or whatsapp him on +2349031670905

  • I suffer from ppd
    23 years on, I only found out 4 weeks ago, that I have this condition,
    I had younger children.i had no support from my husband to comfort me. I didn’t think �� it was depression
    my son passed away on his 2nd week with sudden Meningitis.
    Since after he died to this day I have had many other traumas passing me

    Suicidal thoughts �� occur to me but due to my strong believes…
    I cannot do this.
    I can only pray that my creator can give me relief.

    On the 3rd night after my babies birth I was crying �� I needed sleep I had the blues, one nurse agrees to nurse him for the night, but when I saw him in the morning, my baby was soaking wet from the back and had not been cared for.
    I can’t trust even these nurses

    Anyway… one thing I know for a fact
    that my baby is in paradise
    and god willing I hope to see him, meet him in the guaranteed paradise for all of those babies ��
    He is waiting for me at the other end…

  • I wish i had a partner who cared about my PPD. Mine left my side once my PPD started. I just pray everyday I can remain strong for mu daughter. If any of you all could just pray for me. I would really appreciate it

  • Thank you so much for this video, I am very interested in therapeutic ketamine and it occurred to me that I would like to know the effects on my fertility and if I were pregnant on my unborn child. I appreciate your advice and insight

  • I had PPD with my first son (1983).  I had NO IDEA what was happening to me.  My mother called it the “baby blues”.  I was NEVER a depressed person.  I remember thinking I could never be a good mother and I thought about putting my son in a basket in the river for someone else to find him; thank God it was in Tucson lol… not many running rivers.  I cried for my sons first 2 weeks.  I felt so inadequate and lonely even though I had everyone around me.  I called the doctors office and they said it was the baby blues and its temporary and I’d get over it.  When I was pregnant with our second child I read a tiny article about how the loss of the mineral, salt, after delivery, can make our body and brain altered and can cause depression.  So, I know this sounds simple, with our second child, after delivery I ate salty things.  I did not have one second of PPD.

  • Why isn’t there a link for the foundation this gentleman started?! Seriously?! I now have ptsd because of the severity of ppd & ppmd. I lived through it, i am surviving with it, but some days are tough beyond what I can describe.

  • My 18 year old daughter 17 years old at the time of birth of her Son suffers from postpartum depression �� �� but can’t find help here in Canada. Keep doing what your doing

  • Postpartum depression can extend to a year or more, i started recovering when my son almost a year an half, i know what had beed through, it is unbearable pain and you will always have this thought that you are not good person enough to be a mother

  • I went through post PP anxiety. It got worse with each kid. It was the worst time of my life. If anyone is suffering right now just know that in time it will go away. I got on meds and got therapy. Now I’m meds free and therapy free and no longer have this. My youngest child is almost 8. It’s hormonal imbalance definitely. I had horrible scary thoughts and I felt I had no control of thinking horrible things. I had to learn that thoughts can’t harm you and have no power. You will not suffer forever I promise. ❤️

  • Bless him. My postpartum anxiety and depression was so bad that we didn’t know if it was postpartum psychosis or not. I had never been suicidal before but I remember telling my dad I was just ready to go home to Jesus. The misery was constant. I can’t imagine the change this kind of thing would have made.

  • What an amazing man.. I struggled through post pardon depression after the birth of my son, and there was nothing like this to help myself. It’s very hard for others to see a disease that’s not visible to the naked eye. God bless this man and everything he’s doing to help all the mommas out there but not only the moms the whole family, because it is the whole family that suffers along. ❤️❤️❤️

  • I just couldn’t stop crying tragedy turned into something beautiful. God bless this young man, what an amazing way to honor your wife!

  • omg thank you thank u thank you so much your a wonderful man, im so sorry u lost your wife… Thank u steven for thinking of families.

  • I had PPD with both of my kids, I was in a constant state of fear, always thinking I was doing everything wrong, I would get so anxious to the point where I would feel physically sick and couldn’t eat. After my babies got to be a few months older I felt better. But that’s not always the case for other mommas. I think going through something as traumatic as child birth, hormone changes, lack of sleep and constant worry over your baby takes a toll on women physically and mentally. I couldn’t have gotten through it without my husband, he was always there for me and it made a world of difference having that support. I pray that anyone going through this gets the help and support they need, I know how miserable it makes you feel and I wouldn’t want anyone to suffer like that.

  • Idk how the older generations did it. Because most of them had a lot of kids, at least in the country where I live in. My grandparents had 12 kids.

  • Your a special man, your daughter seems very happy may you both ne consoled after loosing your wife and her precioys mum..you both will be rewarded for this effort

  • Hi. This is very heartfelt, postpartum depression is definitely a big thing.But also depression is tremendously big in stay at home moms.We lose our sense of the outside world and everyday seems to be the same or like a groundhogs day. You make a choice to stay and raise your kids while your spouse goes out to provide for home,It is very scary because days turn into years then they turns into decades. This is a wonderful platform for mothers and families to find the support needed.
    Wonderful caring safe place.
    Education is huge for communities.
    Greatful for people like you.

  • So heartbreaking… I had postpartum anxiety for a year after I had my first daughter. Luckily, I was never suicidal, but I was so afraid to harm my child that I was thinking to ask my husband to lock me in mental health facility. I was afraid to be alone with my daughter. I’m not going in to the details of my impulses, believe me, you don’t want to know. What got me thru is Brook Shields book ” Down came the rain” and couple other books I found. I was afraid to have a second child for a long time. When I finally had my second daughter it was totally different experience.

  • Im in postpartum depression too.i never imagine before that during pregnancy and after that its gonna be so hard that I could have suicide thoughts. I’m also thinking that one day I will open a help center for pregnant ladies where they could get any help like free cooked food,their chores etc etc.

  • I battled depression before and after pregnancy, and no one believed me BUT my husband. I struggled to fight it And because no one believed me I didn’t have the courage to seek help. I read and read, and I was pretty sure wiithin me I have depression. My own parents simply told me not to stress about things, meanwhile I have this very vivid picture in my mind on how I want to end it all. Only one friend of mine who lives on the opposite side of the world listened to me and said don’t stop talking about it, don’t suffer in silence. With those words I focused more on my desire to live through it because of my child. Thankfully my depression didn’t manifest in a way for me to harm my child. In my darkest of times, during a seven year period, my child was my glimmer of hope, my light at the end of the dark tunnel.

    When I child turned six, I decided it was time for me to go back to working as my child is then old enough to be at school, then I could expand my world beyond motherhood. With my conscious effort to shrug off my dark thoughts and with the help of therapists I managed to keep my dark thoughts at bay. However, my husband played a big role in giving me strength and support; and my son my North and beacon.

    Suffering from PTSD is difficult. A big thank you to for taking this awareness and initiative forward. And to women and men battling this condition, don’t stop reaching out, don’t stop talking about your emotions and your thoughts. Strength and love to you all.

  • Thank you for doing this for moms. My whole life was changed from PTSD and ppd. I had a very traumatic birth and pregnancy. I was 19 yrs old and finding out I had a heart issues along with pregnancy and I could have died at anytime. I was dying about 10 min after being put in the post partum room. No one paid attention. There was an angel that day in the form of a nurse. She had just switched from cardiology to labor and delivery. She worse diff scrubs and had a lazy eye. My heart and every being told myself to remember her. The post partum nurses weren’t English speakers. My heart rate was between 250 to 300 beats per minute. I called 911 from the hospital. Finally cardiologists showed up. I was a spectacle. I was rare. I was unique in their field. F that and throw it all away. I didn’t bond with my baby until later. After I spiraled into addiction and insanity. Again thank you to this man. I wish that my hospital had this.

  • What a great person! He is an inspiration�� His wife is beautiful and their daughter is going to be something very special I can tell ��

  • Can we like keep track of their relationship and see how they’re like when she’s a teen?? Cause everything about this video is heartbreaking. Praying for the best for them.

  • Way back, I have suicidal thought after giving birth to my second baby and nobody from my family seems to care even my partner and they think that I am being dramatic.

    I thank God ’cause my kids are now 3 and 2. And I am still f’n alive.

  • Wow this made me cry ��. I love how the little girl loves her mommy and how the daddy has kept her memory alive. Good job dad and the work you’re doing. Post partum depression is no joke at all.

  • I lost my husband to suicide in 1996, so I feel your pain. My children were 6 and 8 when daddy died, but I made it a point to never keep the cause of his death under wraps. I wanted them to understand that depression and mental illness can be life-threatening, just as any major disorder involving our vital organs. I also wanted them to know how much their daddy loved them. It’s not an easy road to walk, but I think you are doing an amazing job at raising your daughter to know the mother she lost at such a young age. Blessings.

  • In my country a nurse makes regular visits to new parents the first year after baby is born. They help you with any and all questions you may have about childcare. They also monitor new parents especially new moms for signs of ppd.

  • I know childbirth is gory and like I saw in a comment on here, childbirth is romanticized everywhere so it makes ppl unprepared or they have unrealistic expectations. i pray for his healing <3. he is strong beyond belief. God bless him.

  • Wished I had met souls like urs….when I most needed, like 3 yrs ago. Thank you god for an amazing strength I’ve found to create a different outcome. Now may god bless you with strength and mighty courage to help those in need of your help.

  • When I was younger my Mom told me to take my upper lip and stretch it over my head. That’s what it feels like to have a baby…��
    I decided not to have any children. Lol

  • OMG!.. 15 months post partum and I am still suffering from PPD, ANXIETY and PMDD…………don’t know where to get help from………..!

  • Hats off to the making of the Video. Very well put. Any Women can connect to this. I will love to share it with my network and suggest new moms to seek for help during PPD.

  • In America PPD is something we talk about openly and honestly, but that is mostly by media and the medical community. There is still some stigma behind it. This story is a great start to letting women everywhere know it is normal and OK to admit it aloud.

  • When the postpartum depression is discussed, it’s often termed as crazy or over thinking or having lacking of interest in baby. It’s really saddening for a mother especially a new mother. She needs help!

  • I had postpartum for all 3 of my kids. With my first I had no idea what it was I was only 19 when I had her I though it was just cause it was all new to me and hard. But when I felt it with my second child I knew something was wrong. I didn’t feel that excitement, I felt forced to feel the happy moments because others made me feel that way. When I told my husband abt it he made me feel like a bad human being. Like if it was me that didn’t love my kids. I had to go through it alone ��

  • Having personally experienced severe PPD and knowing the darkness it takes you into, I just feel so happy with what you’ve done.
    Even though I’m in Pakistan where awareness about these issues is just beginning, knowing that somewhere out there people are getting help is really reassuring.
    Kudos!!!

  • Wow I am speechless. God bless him. Triumph after tragedy. He could’ve taken a completely different route at life and yet he has made something beautiful from ashes.

  • I still recall the time when I got myself out from depression months ago thanks to this depression treatment method “fetching kafon press” (Google it). I was jobless on crutches in a foreign country living in a shoebox with a ruined soul. I feel a sense of alleviation right now since I want to become better and I am going towards the proper path..