How Might My Teen Be Sexually Harassed in school

 

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Here are just a few examples of sexual harassment that can be found in elementary, middle, and high school hallways: unwanted, unwelcome physical contact, such as touching, bumping, grabbing, or patting sexually insulting remarks about race, gender, ability, or class bragging about sexual prowess for others to hear. This sexual harassment at school has seriously affected my daughter’s ability to perform at school. She never wants to go to school, or participate in sports or music.

As you may know, she has been on the honor roll consistently since the first grade. Her grades have slipped to a “C” average. Most upsetting, she has fallen into a sad and moody. A 16-year-old high school student isn’t pleased about the way her school handled her recently reported incident of on-the-premises sexual harassment — and took to Twitter to make her feelings known. The Harvey Weinstein saga might hopefully shine a light on a problem much closer to home: the issue of teen girls being sexually harassed at school.

Adolescent girls get groped primarily in the hallways and classrooms at school, but girls also experience guys grinding on them on the dance floor at mixers and any place where they are not supervised. If sexual harassment starts in middle school, high school is where the problem morphs into an epidemic. With early occurrences of sexual harassment going unchecked, the frequency of harassment can.

In the spring of 2016, a group of students at a Boston-area high school staged a walkout to protest what they said was daily misogyny and sexual harassment at school, including instances of sexual. A tween or teen on the receiving end of sexual bullying is likely to be bullied, gossiped about, teased, insulted, cyberbullied, ignored, ostracized, shamed, and intimidated. Unlike physical bullying, sexual bullying can be difficult to spot because it does not usually leave a visible mark. Sexual bullying often happens when no adults are around. The only factor that had a greater effect than non-physical sexual harassment on teens?

Gender. Teen girls, in general, struggle most with anxiety, depression, healthy body image and self-esteem, which can compound the effects of sexual harassment. “Girls are also more negatively affected by sexual harassment than boys are,” Bendixen added. If someone stalks you, gets in your personal space, or acts threateningly, that may be a form of sexual harassment, too.

Pressure from authority figures. Harassment doesn’t just come from other. Let’s take a look at what sexual harassment looks like in the context of middle and high schools so you can know how to address it this school year. What is Sexual Harassment?

Sexual harassment is an umbrella term for any unwelcome comment, action, or behavior of a sexual nature. Harassing comments include catcalling, inappropriate/unwanted comments about a person’s body or sexual orientation, slut-shaming.

List of related literature:

Sexual harassment at school is widespread and it is likely that other students are experiencing what your daughter is going through.

“Girls Growing Up on the Autism Spectrum: What Parents and Professionals Should Know About the Pre-Teen and Teenage Years” by Shana Nichols, Liane Holliday Willey, Ginamarie Moravcik, Samara Pulver-Tetenbaum
from Girls Growing Up on the Autism Spectrum: What Parents and Professionals Should Know About the Pre-Teen and Teenage Years
by Shana Nichols, Liane Holliday Willey, et. al.
Jessica Kingsley Publishers, 2009

Teens who are victims of frequent or intense sexual harassment are often unwilling to face their harasser at school.

“Encyclopedia of Adolescence” by Roger J.R. Levesque
from Encyclopedia of Adolescence
by Roger J.R. Levesque
Springer New York, 2014

And when they do come forward, bringing school sexual harassment into the open, it is often dealt with quickly and nervously; it is swept under the rug, turned aside, or even turned against the girl who had the courage to complain.

“Failing at Fairness: How America's Schools Cheat Girls” by Myra Sadker, David Sadker
from Failing at Fairness: How America’s Schools Cheat Girls
by Myra Sadker, David Sadker
Scribner, 2010

• Provide family members with information about sexual harassment or assault, and about the kinds of responses that will be most helpful to teens (e.g., believing the student, being nonjudgmental, communicating support and validation).

“The School Services Sourcebook: A Guide for School-Based Professionals” by Cynthia Franklin, Mary Beth Harris, Paula Allen-Meares
from The School Services Sourcebook: A Guide for School-Based Professionals
by Cynthia Franklin, Mary Beth Harris, Paula Allen-Meares
Oxford University Press, 2006

Let the teen know that her false denials to others that are intended to avoid the embarrassment or stigma associated with abuse can be damaging should a trial become necessary.

“Investigation and Prosecution of Child Abuse” by American Prosecutors Research Institute,, National Center for the Prosecution of Child Abuse
from Investigation and Prosecution of Child Abuse
by American Prosecutors Research Institute,, National Center for the Prosecution of Child Abuse
SAGE Publications, 2004

When victims of sexual harassment tell someone, 61 percent tell a friend, 24 percent tell a parent or family member, and only 19 percent tell a teacher or other school employee.

“Sexual Exploitation in Schools: How to Spot It and Stop It” by Robert J. Shoop
from Sexual Exploitation in Schools: How to Spot It and Stop It
by Robert J. Shoop
SAGE Publications, 2004

See Catherine Hill and Holly Kearl, Crossing the Line: Sexual Harassment at School (Nov. 2011), available at https:// www.aauw.org/files/2013/02/Crossing-the-Line-Sexual-Harassment-at-School.

“Sports Law and Regulation: Cases, Materials, and Problems” by Matthew J. Mitten, Timothy Davis, Rodney K. Smith, Kenneth L. Shropshire
from Sports Law and Regulation: Cases, Materials, and Problems
by Matthew J. Mitten, Timothy Davis, et. al.
Wolters Kluwer, 2019

Communicate the school district commitment to ending sexual harassment.

“Human Resources Administration for Educational Leaders” by M. Scott Norton
from Human Resources Administration for Educational Leaders
by M. Scott Norton
SAGE Publications, 2008

If, upon notice of the complaint, the school conducted a prompt and thorough investigation, and if it was determined that sexual harassment took place and prompt punishment was commensurate with the severity of the harassment, it is unlikely that a court would find the school district to be liable.

“The Principal's Quick-Reference Guide to School Law: Reducing Liability, Litigation, and Other Potential Legal Tangles” by Dennis R. Dunklee, Robert J. Shoop
from The Principal’s Quick-Reference Guide to School Law: Reducing Liability, Litigation, and Other Potential Legal Tangles
by Dennis R. Dunklee, Robert J. Shoop
SAGE Publications, 2006

When asked if she has encountered any sexual harassment at her school, a teenager focuses only on unwanted physical contacts.

“Child Development and Education” by Teresa M. McDevitt, Jeanne Ellis Ormrod, Glenn Cupit, Margaret Chandler, Valarie Aloa
from Child Development and Education
by Teresa M. McDevitt, Jeanne Ellis Ormrod, et. al.
Pearson Higher Education AU, 2012

Oktay Kutluk

Kutluk Oktay, MD, FACOG is one of the world's foremost experts in fertility preservation as well as ovarian stimulation and in vitro fertilization for infertility treatments. He developed and performed the world's first ovarian transplantation procedures as well as pioneered new ovarian stimulation protocols for embryo and oocyte freezing for breast and endometrial cancer patients.

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47 comments

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  • it’s almost a year to this video and pirate crew still replying to each of the comments!! Congrats for a million views hope u get millions subs too sooN!

  • Sexual harassment…I thought he was just showing her the Attack, Decay and Feedback Stop Release on the Roland Jupiter-8 in that video.

  • But we do drop pants as a joke, like you pull of the pants to show the boxers and we need to get ridiculust one. I own a flamingo boxers and a hearts one.

  • All the girls, women, mothers in the usa must write to their ministry of women, to their President Donald Trump, to Human Right and asked for the abolished of all porn busness in the usa, in the world…asked to change the fashion busness who are made arround the girls sex, asked to order the american films producers to stop make their young actresses play only sex scene who dirty &denigrate all girls in the usa & the world…the western world is 100%male and all the girls must end it, stop dressing sexy to please men, make prayer &families their priority instead of sex&men….

  • I understand, UR NOT ALONE! Now I’m not going to share my story bc, I rlly don’t like talking about it but we all need to come together and stop this nonsense ��✋✋✋��������

  • I almost got raped when I was only 4 years old by my own cousin, I only see him once a year for some reasons.. and it’s just awkward because my parents knows it

  • You should’ve slapped the fuck out him then proceed to tell your teacher.I don’t know you but I wanna punch that guy in the face for you.Sorry you had to go through that.

  • this video kind of creeped the sh**t out of me. the fact that the guys were staring at her sexually even when her outfit wasnt even that provocative looking is very bothersome and cringey. i think this shows the kind of culture and level of sexualization people had of females back in the 80s is kind of mind blowing. i dont know whether these guys are kind of portraying pedophilic tendencies of being into girls that dress like children or the fact that its a girl didnt matter to them what she wore to be held to this form of treatment.

  • When I was walking in the hallway today, some girl slapped my butt and I turned and gave her a disgusted look. She looked at me like she didn’t do anything wrong. I told her that was inappropriate and she knows that I’m not a lesbian. She knows that I prefer boys. She then said she was just playing around. I said that it was sexual harassment and sexual assault. I’m 12 and she’s 15 and she got held back a few times. �� This video helps a lot. ��

  • I’ve experienced it and it still happens…This boy in my class touches his genitals and makes sexual comments right in front of me. I always tell him to stop but he doesn’t. He says things such as “OH yeaHA baBy” And it makes me really uncomfortable… He is also racist… I just told my mom and she told me that it is not good and to tell a teacher, but I don’t want to.. He is my friend…Or was..

  • I was sexually assaulted once by some drunk guy on the bus when I was 14 once by my stepfather and twice by someone younger than me

  • But the Topic that you guys selected is the real scene now a days in the workplaces and because in this type of hactic situations they surrender or finishes their life….

  • My stepdad secretly touches me when I’m asleep and It wakes me up but then he immediately leaves or pretends to do something and I want it to stop�� I already told my mom but she said that she’ll tell him to not do it again but he’s always still so suspicious and I know he still touches me every night, I can feel it.������

  • I hate these sayings
    “Did you lead them on?”
    “Boys will be boys”
    “Do you think maybe what you were wearing influenced that type of behavior”

    NO BITCH I NEVER LEAD THEM ON AND NO BITCH IF U SAY BOYS WILL BE BOYS THEN THEY WILL NEVER LEARN FROM THEIR MISTAKES ALSO BITCH I CAN WEAR WHAT I WANT DOESNT MEAN IM ASKING FOR IT

  • High time we lock these monsters up and start using them for medical experiments! They don’t deserve to live in a normal healthy society. Since they are a burden on this planet let them be of some use.
    PS: we will save thousands of innoncent lab rats n other animals

  • Irrespective of the country..
    Such great girls and sisters are the pride of any nation…
    To prevent a nation from disaster and collapse such females must be given their true share of rights and regard.

  • It’s a nice vedio bro but Jo end ai wo glt ai suicide hi hr prob ka solution Ni ai. Specialy for girls. Agr msg Dena ai ye do tht girl kick the ass these kind of assholes. Bcz suicide girls ko ek glt way dikhata ai n also for boys. So ye sikhayo to the boys respect the girls apki b sis ai wife ai wo v kl job kre gi then ink sth b aisaho skt Jo kro ge wo bhro ge

  • Something similar happened to me but I was alone in me ex best friends room btw she was another girl but I said no then she stopped

  • women get sexually harassed, raped, objectified and sexualized way too often. thank you for showing the truth. we’ve got to change the world.

  • Is it sexual harassment if it happened one time in a physical way?

    Situation: A girl and a guy get paired up for a school assignment. She didn’t know this guy very well, but she had friends who were pretty close to this guy. As the teacher explained what they were supposed to do, he started to touch/rub the girls thighs. No one noticed this. At first she thought he was joking around, but he didn’t stop. The girl soon started to move her chair farther and farther away from him. All he did was move closer. Then he started touching her back from the top to the bottom (near her butt). Does this count as sexual harassment?

  • Actualy by this logic you can call everything sexual harassment, and yes,you can accuse your badroom mirror for showing you naked you its called showing inappropriate sexual picture or video,

  • i dont know why but i have experienced all the circumstances listed at the start and yet dont really seem as upset as i probably should be in fact i know lots of people that have experienced this.

    THIS NEEDS TO BE SHOWN IN SCHOOLS.

  • 8:00 thats exactly what happened to me at 10th grade. But a very nice girl told him to stop that he is almost going to rape me, then he stopped.

  • Why the hell this kind of girl tolerate this bullshit..slap him… Search another job….aise boss ko shayad uski wife kam padti hai…son of b***h…

  • I was sexually harassed when I was 6 I didn’t tell anyone but when I became 10 I told my mom I still get nightmares about it but it’s fine now ig

  • Great video. Quite eye opening! Imagine what you would do in such a scenario…

    (Side note: awesome acting by everyone involved:D)

  • My story is so similar to yours. I told people, teachers saw everything, it wasn’t a secret. Nothing was ever done until I lost it one time and we got into a physical fight and started throwing chairs at each other. I gave the school faculty absolute hell and they apologized for not doing anything. Seriously… when people act like it’s normal you start to wonder whether it was you all along. Thanks for sharing your story girl ❤ we’re stronger with your voice out there.

  • You have to Stand up for yourself, even when your a girl dont cry, Use your strength to Get out and after that punch him hard as you could, Kick him and Run away as fast, then Call the police in a safe place with public, if you phone is not there Tell someone for help to call the police.

  • when was in year 7 i was dating his guy and he touched me in the breast twice when i said i was going to the teachers he said he would deny it and make me out a liar me being 13 and confused and scared didn’t say anything and i am only coming out to my friends today. he also looked up my dress and then told me it was my fault and this happened at school.

  • I was sexually harassed by someone I was dating at the time and always brushed it off as regular male behavior and blamed myself for not making it more clear that his behavior was inappropriate. I felt the same as you in that I’ve always been a feminist who stands up for women and encourages women to have the power to speak up and say no. This made it even harder for me to accept that I didn’t stand up for myself and as a result, encouraged behavior that in the long run has been mentally and emotionally damaging. I also worry that he will think that this behavior is appropriate to do to other girls due to my lack of refusal and rejections. I’ve grown sense then and learned that he should have known what he was doing was wrong and I can’t blame myself for what he did to me. I’ve also learned that standing up for yourself is not rude or inconsiderate. As women, we are raised with this notion that we must accommodate our feelings in order to please men. Therefore, we often give in to men’s sexual pressures and excuse their behavior in order to keep them from feeling guilt. Men need to be held accountable for their actions, and need to understand that sexual gratification is not worth harassing or assaulting or abusing a woman into getting what they want.

  • I was sexually harassed by a friend I was sitting down and he told me to pick up his pencil and I did because it was close to me he stood up in front of me I got to the pencil and he was in front of me and pushed my face near his dick he was laughing at me in front of his friends along with one my friend who was a girl it hurt me but I thought I didn’t get impacted until a week later the teacher assigned seats and they put me next to him and I started getting mad because I didn’t wanna sit next to him I didn’t remember but I got sent out in the since I never sat next to him when I was walking to the office I started crying because I realized it was because of what he did it took me a long time to get used to being at school again I told the dean but all they made him do was say sorry even though they said they were going to call have a parent meeting pretty much my school never takes stuff serious

  • One time at my school me and my boyfriend were hugging and he asked me for a kiss but I didn’t want to so I nodded my head no. So he kept asking me and I kept nodding my head no so I decided to push him away but his hands were really tight around my waist. And I kept trying to push him off but he wouldn’t let go and he just kept asking. So I tried telling him I didn’t want to miss my bus so I had to go but he wouldn’t listen and my bsf was just watching us and she wasn’t doing anything and she told him to just kiss me even though I didn’t want to. So he tried but I tried moving my face and he let go and I just ran away… And that wasn’t the first time he’s done that. He’s asked to kiss and touch me before and I let him because I thought if I didn’t he would break up with me… But I think I should have stood up for myself

  • This is so sad—I feel your pain, and sounds very similar to other stories I’ve been watching on you-tube & from older women too, who had same response: shock, confusion and blaming themselves—women are unprepared, but I think sharing helps us problem solve:) & hopefully with this movement boys/men will learn from other women it’s not acceptable to sexually harass

  • Is this also considered sexual harassment if the person constantly calls you daddy or that they say “I love you” when you never agreed to be with that person or when they forcefully convert your sexuality to what you prefer to something you don’t want to be?

  • The acting is really good, I feel bad knowing that such incidents are actually happening, thank you for creating a little bit of awareness about the seriousness of the situation is girls face.

  • I know exactly how you feel, this happened to me my freshman year of high school and it was so upsetting because I would never expect something like this to happen to me before but sadly it did. There was this boy who kept harassing me out in the hallway and was forcing himself on me to try to give me a hug after I said no, and then he was staring down at my chest area when he treys to give me a hug. Then at a summer camp I went to 2 years ago there was some jerk boy who kept running past me slapping my butt and I hated it and was so wrong. Whoever can relate to me and knows how this feels tell the person to stop immediately because sexual harassment is absolutely WRONG! ��✋�� STOP IT RIGHT NOW!

  • It pisses me off that EVERY SINGLE sexual harassment psa they have male perpetrators. There are plenty of stories about female perpetrators, don’t target men!����‍♀️��

  • There’s this boy who does sexual harrasment and gives zero respect to girls like I’m done with him I tell him many times to stop I even ignore what he does so he will stop but he never does

  • Yeah well perverts are created by the pornography industry, if you don’t want perverts to exist then stop creating them by getting rid of the pornography industry point blank.

  • MY TEACHER SHOWED THIS VIDEO TO OUR CLASS AND WE ALL DIED ESPECIALLY AT THE PART WHERE A GUY SLAPS SOMEBODY’S ASS WITH A FREAKING TOWEL������

  • Thanks for the support by liking this video! Help us make more videos like this! http://www.patreon.com/iwantmylauren Also Thanks so much for liking and commenting! Comment below if something like this has happened to you. Sad to say that things like this happen to women including me and a lot of my friends all the time. Hopefully this video can help people see and relate to my experience and stop treating women like this.

  • Thank you so much for this video
    This issue had to be addressed as it is still so common
    Happy to be a part of this project
    Grateful to the entire team of LearnAur. Keep up with the good work guys!!!

  • I touched a girl in middle school we were very good friends and I never had a friend that was a girl I touched her hair and leg slightly and she just laughed and I just felt so weird but now when she looks at me she just sees through me and I feel more than ever guilty for doing something so terrible I hope she can forgive me one day

  • Thank you for sharing in that way this story can get people talk openly about this problem and face it. Also new parents can talk about the value of the respect with his children.

  • I’m 11 and I’ve been harassed by a boy at my school. I pushed him into a bus, looked him strait in the eye and told him he was a scumbag. Then walked away with pride. I told my mom about it, he got suspended

  • Before doing sonething to someone
    “Think that your not alone soneone is watching you from the top of the sky”
    Then no need of paying consequences

  • This is a good video with an important message but I noticed that when you talked about sexual harassment in general you kinda acted like it only happens to girls and is only done by guys. That’s not how it works. at all.